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Wow. Somehow I had avoided this thread until today, when I read the whole thing start to finish. The funny thing is, I knew on the first few pages what I would find on the later ones, I just didn't know if the drama-bomb had yet gone off. Given there were 27 pages when I started reading (28 now) and they began in the summer, I correctly assumed it had. I can't give any advice or make any observations that haven't been made a couple dozen times already. I think you both realize that the events of the last 6 months were the stimulus that brought other issues crashing to the surface... the last straw so to speak. Whether or not you can survive all of this depends in what your true hopes and motives are. Not what you write here or say to each other, but the thoughts you only share with yourselves. I don't wish you a break-up, nor do I wish you a continued relationship. I wish you whatever is the right road to create the maximum love and happiness in your lives. Whatever happens, please do us happy swingers the favor of NOT blaming swinging for any of your troubles. Swinging is a couples sport, to be engaged in for the enjoyment, benefit, and bonding it creates for a couple, and what you participated in is so far removed from healthy swinging that it doesn't deserve the use of the name. We face enough prejudices from vanilla society as it is, for someone to point to you guys and say, "See, that's what happens when you swing" just isn't right. I wish you luck, now that I've read this whole sordid mess, I suppose I'll keep abreast of whatever updates you wish to share. One final note: The very last thing your relationship needs at this point is even the idea of including other people in your sexuality. If it ever gets to that point that you feel that would be healthy for you, and IMO that's a very, very big if, forget the idea of having a little side-thing. As a couple, go to a swing club (and I'd recommend the first time with the rule that you are only there to observe.) 22 year old males do nothing but think with their cocks, and most 22 year olds are so happy to be getting any pussy from anyone under any terms they'll way too easily let themselves slip into relationship thinking. I would be very wary even of a married couple of that age for precisely that reason.

STOP !!! A husband and wife arguing over the internet??? Really? Cutting?? Seriously??? Lawyers, suits and undertones of abuse??? Come on, turn off the fucking computer, cancel the cell phones and FOCUS. You drug a child in the middle of this, she is seeing your bullshit first hand, she should be soooo proud The longer this crap occurs, the more damage is done to her !! Got problems?? I'm sorry, get help. FOCUS on that help, the methods, the processes, ect... and be serious about applying it !!! You are not the only victim on this board. I can't believe I'm reading this.......... And by "You" I mean both!

That would, on the surface, seem to be a kind and reasonable approach. If you pop positive, stop playing to save others the same fate. But, after further review, is it really reasonable? At any given party of say 200 people, unless an argument can be made that swingers as a whole don't have the same statistics of the general population, there will be somewhere from 40-50 people who have HSV-2. (And, of course, that particular statistic could be quite low if my original hypothesis is correct.) Of those 40-50, 36-45 of them have no idea they're infected, so out of 200 people only 4-5 of them have HSV-2 and know it. Even if every person who knows they're infected decides not to participate it only reduces the actual number of HSV-2 participants by a handful. So, on the one hand, it's the ethical, reasonable, and kind thing if you know you have HSV-2 to not participate, or at least participate only after full disclosure. On the other hand, one only needs to go through a relatively small handful of playmates before one has a virtual certainty of having played with someone HSV-2 positive, whether they know it or not. Frankly the expectation that it won't happen to you is, statistically speaking anyway, unreasonable. I'm beginning to think an HSV-2 infection is inevitable if you participate in the Lifestyle long enough, unless either the stats are wrong, or an HSV-1 infection (which virtually all of us have) offers statistically meaningful protection.