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To go off topic a little, I'm very curious where the OP grew up so I could understand where condoms were illegal? Italy? Germany? Ireland? I know it was illegal to advertise them, but to actually buy them? Wow -- I had no idea!! Not saying it wasn't so, but just really curious. I've thoroughly read this train wreck of a thread, and even though I had a helluva time reading the OP's thoughts (please use paragraphs) I think I have to agree with just about everyone above. I apologize in advance if I didn't understand something. I've raised three adult children without blocking their sexual education. They were NOT taught about sex in high school and condoms were NOT available to them unless they went to a district health office. It was OUR responsibility to educate our children about sex and it was open discussion in our house. Believe me when I say it was always discussed. They know about our toy box and they know their parents are a bit "out of this world". Questions were ALWAYS answered honestly and they have all grown into wonderful adults who enjoy sex. They are old enough now to make their own decisions about sex, and if they wanted to talk about sexual experiences, fine by us. Sometimes TMI, but as good parents do, we listen. The Swingers Board website is pretty much always up on my laptop and I don't hide my laptop. It's either on my kitchen table, on the livingroom ottoman, chair, where ever. I've got my youngest two still living at home with us. It wouldn't take a rocket scientist to find it on our computer. There is an icon on our toolbar and one on my desktop. If they have questions, fine. While we are open to talking about sex with our kids, we don't share what our sex life is like. To our kids, that's a TMI, anyway and I know they prefer not to know anything about it. Would I ever introduce our kids to the swinging lifestyle? No. Our oldest child knows about our swinging lifestyle. I wouldn't be surprised if the other two know about it, too. Our one daughter who does know accepts our lifestyle, but she still can't wrap her head around how we can share partners without jealousy or wanting to rip the hair out of our spouses partner. It's totally incomprehensible to her. It's a matter of maturity with her, and she's not mature enough to understand, just like we weren't at her age. We lived monogamously for twenty-two years. We started exploring swinging a few years ago and have found that it highly enriched our marriage and the way we communicate. Even though that's a plus to us, our kids can't understand how having sex with others can make our marriage better. They may never understand and that's OK. When the OP talks about having a daughter meet a sex partner, it sounds as if the parent is pimping her out. Like many have mentioned, sounds illegal and against her will. In summary, I have no problem teaching my kids about sex education. I refuse to include our lifestyle in that conversation. If we didn't participate in this lifestyle, I still wouldn't bring it up.

Okay, I'm going to try one more time and then I'm going to abandon this thread in disgust. Also, I'd suggest you preview and edit your posts (and add paragraphs) because part of the problem people are having is just understanding what you are saying. 1. Sex is not simply a matter of DNA and desire. It is bound up in the needs and norms of society. You say condoms were illegal when you were young and now they are handed out in HS. Why? The needs and norms of the society changed. It is the job of parents to make children aware of these norms so they can grow up IN society (they'll reject it later on their own). 2. You need to understand that the thing that upset everyone was your suggestion that a swinging parent take his child (daughter, in your version) to a swing club, or hand her over to a swinging friend for experience. Here's what's wrong with that. It is forcing sexuality on your child. You give your child information, not experiences! 3. I want to address this point: " I have read so many threads about how happy a couple is about their first swinging experience and so many long time swingers threads about the thrill of hot sex experiences. Is it so wrong for you to educate your child about what you yourself think is the prefered sexual activity in your life second only to making love to your spouse? Is it wrong to flatly believe there is nothing to be learned about what is important in a marriage by looking for the things that matter most in choosing a lifetime love by having sexual experiences that relogates sex to just play?" Several flaws in your argument here. First, swinging is not THE preferred sexual experience, but the one that is working for them now. Earlier in life they may have preferred monogamy. Maybe later on they'll prefer poly. We change, we evolve. You can't assume that swinging is best for every person at every stage of his or her life. Second, you seem to believe (again, hard to tell because this passage is written so poorly) that sex is one of or the most important thing in a marriage. Wrong. It's great, but it hardly beats out trust and respect and love. I'd teach children about those first. 4. Final point, using my personal history. I'm into BDSM, a kink I always knew about but only started seriously exploring in the last year. Exploring this has enriched my sex life (and Mr. Ivory's) a great deal. Does this mean that my parents should have introduced me to BDSM? God no! Does this mean that my sex life in my 20s and 30s was bad? Absolutely not! It was great and now it's off the charts, but frankly, I don't know if I could have handled BDSM play earlier in my life. My point is that many of us came to swinging after establishing a strong happy relationship, after being happy with monogamous sex. You can't assume that all children want to or should be swingers, any more than you could assume that they all want to or should be poly, or parents, or anything at all. I've gone on at great length and I apologize for not being able to shorten this. I'm not good at pithy (that's Mr. Ivory). But I hope at least some of these points made sense.