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Unicorn here. Have been following this thread with interest Mr. and Mrs. UC. I do not know how all single fems feel but I would to step in with a few notes from my position. First off, what Mr Fun says is on the money with regards to profiles. It helps if the unicorn senses she will be regarded as desired or wanted by both of you for being herself, not just because she is one. The unicorn has plenty of options to just be a toy or lay in the swing world. But if you want to go from chasing to catching, you may be best served by helping her want to come to you over all the other contacts she receives. While the "His answer" gives the unicorn something to tie into, the "Her answer" says it can be any one....just a body that fits some undefined physical parameter. Tybee brings up another very good point. Mrs. UC, you may quite well not be a passive woman. But giving the impression in person, or online, of being passive will cause me to react as Tybee does. Passivity has led to feelings of wife is doing this for hubby, wife almost laying there with me doing most of the work, wife getting uncomfortable in playtime, me being an extra and not an equal part of the "romp". All of which has proven out. Plus, for me it is difficult to get excited about being with a couple when the sexual energy and overatures are only coming from one person. I clearly do not know you well enough to say whether you are passive or not. Nor do I know how you would be in a threesome sexually. But I can say, your chances of catching one or many unicorns increases if you make her feel you desire her. Practice letting Mr. UC start the in person conversation, or the email chats, or IMs, etc. to get the ball rolling but you jump in quickly. Become a part of it. Then 50% of the conversation. Then more. Until you can make those overatures on your own. If the idea is for you all to play as a threesome, then you need to show her who you are as well as who your husband is. It is both of you she needs to feel desired by. And if it is for him to watch and you and she to play, then by all means...it all needs to come from you. Lean on him but push yourself to not appear passive, sure of what you are looking for, and why the two of you could be the best contact a unicorn could make.

Two pieces of advice for you if you do decide to start opening up and being the one to approach someone: 1. You are going to be unsuccessful plenty of times so be prepared for rejection and a lack of 'results' 2. To get comfortable and proficient at walking up and talking to someone you're going to need practice, so do it a lot. Even just to be friendly. If you go about it not expecting any result in particular and instead focus on learning how to approach and talk to women you will start to see good results in how comfortable you get with it. There is no magic formula for how to do it, no lines or anything like that. Get comfortable starting the conversation, being friendly and talking then I think that other post that you were linked to may be of good help to you Good luck with everything and I hope you continue to post as well!

Hi Mrs. UC, nice to see you come out! Just know this...people make impressions about others very quickly. If you seem very shy and let your husband do all of the talking, people may get the impression very quickly that you are passive. They may think that if you're passive initially (socially), that you'll be passive later, too. See what I mean? It's not unreasonable for people to draw that conclusion. It may not be the reality for you, but it might be what comes across to them. People form opinions in a few seconds or in the first few minutes. Come out right from the get-go with a warm welcome, warm smiles, and something friendly to say. It's not that hard. Just practice it in different kinds of situations and it becomes easier. Your husband started this thread, asking questions on your behalf. It took all this time for you to join with your own post. On the 'net, it looked like you were "quietly standing behind him" and letting him do all of the talking. That gave the impression of passivity. When the two of you are making contacts on websites to meet up with people, is it also like that, with your husband doing most of the "talking"? In my experience, that always made me leary that the woman was passive and possibly even being dragged into this by her husband. Sometimes that was precisely the reality. Don't take this personally or feel defensive. Just consider all of this from the perspective of people who don't know you yet, and only know a little of you through a profile, or a conversation that's being carried mostly by your husband. Again, it's all about impressions, and you've got to do what you can to create the best first impression you can. If you're not really passive at all, show that to people in speaking for yourself, responding to them (written or verbal), etc. These are all just friendly tips to help you find what you want. I hope you keep us posted on what happens!

Guess it is time to jump in here. Since I have been in the real "Porn" business for 30 years now, in the Lifestyle longer than that and running a very known club for half that time. EVERY TIME that any well known porn people have showed up at the club the "Swingers" left. The others, nonswingers, which is most these days, were all excited and hung out. For those that go to clubs and don't swing they seem to be very into porn and porn stars but it puts a big damper on a good Swingers Party. Same pretty much holds true when a group of "Internet Girls" shows up. The Swingers hit the door and some of the single guys are cool with it until they meet the girls then wonder why they wasted their time. Even at the National Lifestyles conventions they found "most" of the time Porn and Swingers did not mix. There where a few exceptions but very few. Take it for what it is worth but over the years we have found it is not a good mix. It can be good for business if you are mostly catering to "todays non-swingers" that hang out at Swing clubs and parties but that is not the crowd that we try to attract. Good luck to you.