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One of our first experiences turned out to be a disaster for myself and the other wife. My wife and he had a ball. (other room) Somehow (after) neither one of us could come to terms with the sound of our relative spouses screaming down the hotel. My imagination was giving him such an undeserved boost in the sex department. The feelings of jealousy were overwhelming. I started running away from my relationship because I wanted to put some distance before she (in my mind) left me for him Now this is where I'll probably raise a few hackles here but we invited him over for a threesome and I forced myself to just watch it. It didn't take long to realize the "reality" of it was it was "just sex". There was no emotion, no love (the real root of my feelings, fears) and it was OK, hot in fact. A couple of months later the other wife who was also experiencing bad feelings asked me how I got over it. I flat out told her she needed to watch them. She did and had the same revalation. It was just sex. Nothing earth shattering! Basically by confronting the fear it brought it back to a reality base and chased away the fears and feelings associated with it. We've had better than a dozen encounters since with no problems. Your therapist will probably shoot me but honestly facing the situation and realizing that I had given it far to much power over my thinking helped me and the other wife deal with the emotional aftermath. I know this type of confrontation therapy is used fairly successfully for treatment of phobias for snakes, spiders etc. And I understand that what worked for us is likely not everyone's cup of tea. Good luck in any case I hope you work it through one way or the other.

My lovely wife has the same fears, despite the fact that I find her as hot as the day we met (although way more skilled now ) she still has some fear that she won't be found sexy. The truth of the matter is she has never had trouble getting a playmate eager and willing, in large part because of her great attitude towards others, and the fun and friendly spirit she exudes. It all boils down to how you click with the other couple, more than any idea of physical perfection (what is that anyway?) as to how satisfied you will be with the encounter anyway. I can almost guarantee that if you go to a meet and greet somewhere, dressed in a sexy get-up, and just talk with a few other couples, your confidence will go up, and nothing is sexier than confidence. Just meeting real people (who may or may not already be actively engaging in full swap) will help you find people that you are both comfortable with letting into your relationship to a greater or lesser extent. If you go to a party/ M&G with the express intent of just getting to know a few people and get revved up for some of your own playtime later, you take away most of the fear of rejection and you can concentrate on having fun and finding others that like you for who you are, not what YOU think you look like. Plus any evening that winds up having some hot , fantasy fueled sex with your own wife is a win for both of you right? Oddly enough, there are quite a few people in the lifestyle community who find thin people unattractive. What I'm saying is don't pre-judge your desirability because you two are exactly the couple some other couple is looking for. Warm, honest about what you want, and enthusiastic in the bedroom right? You'll do great. Come on, the water's fine! Well, that was certainly long winded enough. I'll go back to