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Want to hear a real-life story from a female? DH and I discuss swinging. We do swing with a single male friend of his. Have an amazing time! He lives in another state, so it was done. Enter male#2. Practically lived with us - 3-4 nights per week. Mr NC had an odd schedule, and often worked weekends. Male#2 was always around. Single, no real dating prospects, no where else to be. He knew about our experience with Male#1, and wanted a piece of it. Well, me to be more specific. I loved the attention, oh how I loved it! The flirting got heavier and heavier and it almost got sexual, without Mr NC around. Let me tell you, I absolutely wanted him. No doubt. Mr. NC, like you, wanted to swing, not have an open relationship. This whole situation was making him extremely uncomfortable, but it didn't stop me from pushing the idea that there wasn't much of a difference, really. One night I finally convinced the both of them that we should try MFM. It was awkward, to say the least. Male#2 even wanted to stay in our bedroom and cuddle afterwards, and Mr. NC absolutely did not like that. It got to the point that Mr. NC hated going to work on the weekends knowing Male#2 would be around, all day, kids or no kids. We took him to a swingers club one night, tried the MFM thing again. It wasn't working. Bottom line: Male#2 got too comfortable in Mr. NC's shoes, thinking he was playing second husband when Mr. NC wasn't around. It took Mr. NC coming unglued, confronting Male#2, for me to even realize what I was doing. Male#2 is no longer around. We talk via phone once in a while, but that's it. Haven't seen him in months. It took me over a year for me to understand what really happened, and my role in it. After 13 years together, completely monogamous and faithful, my hormones went raging after our first swinging experience. The tigress had come alive, but in all the wrong ways. Thank GOD Mr. NC knows me so well, and figured out what was going on, before it had gone on any further. He not only confronted me, but he did confront male#2. It had to happen. I seriously could have ruined my marriage with the way I was carrying on. Now, a year and half later, we swing with couples, occasional singles, and life is grand. But what an experience we had to work through to get there. I seriously hope that your conversation with your wife Sunday does end the situation. But if for one moment in your gut you feel things aren't right, stand up for your marriage and confront it, with both of them.