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Big Rock, I think those who stated their need for discretion made their point clear that "outting" themselves would ultimately pose a risk to their livelihood...not that swinging is innately immoral, just that the misguided perceptions of their peers, supervisors, managers and clients (people not in the lifestyle with them) could render irreparable damage to their careers. Honesty is extremely important in the lifestyle...but you need to keep that concept in context. Honesty about my lifestyle with my boss, mother, client, or the Starbucks barrista is not only irrelevant, its ridiculous. Honesty must take place between the parties involved in the act of swinging, but it is unnecessary with anyone else. And calling people hypocrites because of this is a little shortsighted. Additionally, no one ever defended the act of denying or lying about involvement in swinging when asked. They just implied not offering the information in general conversation with a vanilla audience; keeping discretion with people who don't really need to know.

Keep'emSeparated: A married couple that plays like two singles. They will only do separate rooms with another couple. If you happen to accidentally get both halves of the couple in the play area, one half will need to leave the play area. When out at the club they rarely talk to each other, and when they do, they are usually fighting about something. AfraidofCooties: You've played with them before and establish a good relationship but if you play with a couple or person they don't like, they drop you like a rock like you're now contaminated with cooties. JackSpratandWife or JillSpratandHusband: Similar to the mismatched couples but just the weight mismatch version. You can't help but hear the nursery rhyme in your head when you see them together (wife or hubby is 3 to 4 times the size of spouse).

I feel you are swinging. This is not really hotwife nor open marriage and certainly not cuckolding. The mutuality and complete communication are hallmarks of swinging. I think this is one of the best examples on this board of a couple doing a thorough, caring, and careful job of breaking into swinging. I congratulate you two. I disagree with other poster's upset over the man being a co-worker. You two were very careful in that regard, and her need for someone she trusts trumps the risk of him being a limited contact co-worker. I hope that you understand (and I trust with your background you do) that many posting here find it difficult to step out of their own personal experience and concepts, and see that you are in your own unique situation which is not the same as theirs. The co-worker polemics are one case in point. Whether you are swinging or not is another. I applaud the care and consideration you've shown for each other and for those who have responded to you here. You two are welcome members here and I look forward to your adventures as well as your input to any threads that interest you.