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We would both do what the other wanted because we love each other and sacrifices are part of the commitment we have for each other. We do occassionally play alone and there are always peaks and valleys when one of us might be playing a little more than the other and that's never become a bone of contention for either of us. We both love the lifestyle but if Bob said stop, we would stop. Would I miss it, absolutely! I just don't see it happening anytime soon.

"So great weather we are having isn't it?" Seriously, we don't tell people for myriad reasons, this being one of them. But if they somehow find out we would say something along these lines, "we respect the choices you make and don't judge you, you are free to live your lives as you see fit, and so are we. If you want to discuss the lifestyle because you are curious, we would be glad to talk about it with you in private, if not there is no need to continue this discussion. If my choices make you uncomfortable and you prefer to end our relationship, then I understand. I value your friendship so I hope you don't make that choice."