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All of this, especially since you state "I got her drunk." This situation actually sickens me.

Not speaking from any experience here-- our lone "dip in the pool" was at Sea Mountain where we kept to ourselves (hope to change that next trip though)-- but it seems presumptuous to speak to anyone, regardless of the setting, and "expect" some particular conduct. It also seems to oversimplify things, and people, to ask them to behave in a certain way. Again, not speaking from experience, but it seems there are as many varieties in the "lifestyle" as colors in a box of crayons. It seems you can coordinate the colors, so to speak, by not pressing and going with the flow. In our case, our boundaries are something in the soft to very soft realm (no need to give details). With that said, we are even then not looking for immediate and random encounters. In fact, part of our quest is to find a like minded couple we can have fun with on multiple levels (we literally have no couple friends in our since "transplanted in" home town). Given that, those who push the "let's get down to business immediately" MO are probably not a good fit for us. In the end, it should all work out in the wash. Of course, those who enjoy full swap and any other variants, I say "rock on." You are doing what pleases you. It would seem if you are not pleasing yourself and working within your limits, there is no point. So in the end, if we've learned anything from what we have read, is just have fun and treat this whole experience as a journey, not a pre-defined destination. My two cents and that may be overvaluing my opinion!!!