Getting back to the original OP and his question, I think the suggestion that look for a couple for your wife to have an FMF with is a great idea for how to get started. Join some of the lifestyle sites and put that has what you are looking for. I would suggest you be present, but plan on not participating. These things once started sometimes expand and it may be the two women will decide to do you as well. Good luck. And oh by the way most of the time threads are not hijacked, so come on back and post your questions or observations. I think you will find there is a wealth of knowledge and experience on this board and the folks are willing to share with you.