Same advise as everyone else. Meet ahead of time and trust your gut (not your groin). If something doesn't seem right, it probably isn't
We are security freaks as well. We have met single guys after chatting and exchanging a few emails. All has gone well. The only thing we have a concern about is him getting the room. We prefer to get the room ot half it and go in together. We are afraid that if he checks in, he may secretly video or webcam us us without our knowledge. Like I said we are freaks and probably being crazy overly cautious.
Above all trust your gut and call it off it something doesn't seem right.