Back to the OP, if this is your first time out we would recommend using SLS to find a SM for a MFM. You will find a nice selection of good looking, respectful, experienced SM's to choose from. The trick is to make sure they have several good certs. Don't even consider a first time encounter with someone without at least two recent certs from attractive couples. Maybe with more experience you can give it a try but why take the chance? We never host so we also make it a requirement that they must host. This also weeds out most married men. When you make contact on SLS keep communications short and sweet, 2 or 3 emails should be all it takes to set up a meeting at a bar or restaurant. Don't chat or text with anyone until you've met in person. The formula for success is simple, don't overthink it. And, yes it is a big deal how the letters line up, it will make a big difference in the number and type of responses you get.