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I think if you want to be taken seriously when posting pictures, make sure you post a picture of the both of you together with clothes and in a normal setting. How many times do you look at a profile picture and it's a selfie bathroom picture or the wife in a sexual position. If all you have are nude sex pictures we just pass you by. We rather you didn't post any pictures. Dick and crotch pictures say absolutely nothing. Don't want to paste a face picture? Then crop the picture. If you post ONLY pictures or him or her alone we feel maybe you aren't a couple. In today's world it is so easy to take a couple picture. I am not saying the nudes are bad, just you should have a nice g rated picture to go with it.

I'll throw this out there: We know very few couples that have been swinging 10+ years that have kids that don't know. Children mature, become teen/adults, and some even develop excellent critical thinking skills. They figure shit out. Some figure it ALL out. Some figure out enough to know that "Something's up with Mom and Dad. Not sure what, but something". But everyone needs to accept the strong possibility that they will figure it out if you play this game long enough.

Although I continued having sex with my ex-fiance from day one, it took me almost two years after I met the man that would become my husband before I let him play with another woman, and it had to be someone I chose. And I was jealous, insanely jealous. But I came to love that feeling, an emotional intensity seeing another having sex with someone that you have such great desire for. It has peaked again when I was able to watch hubby having sex with another woman, and later under different scenarios. I'm not S&M in any other way, but I crave that pain.

When I looked at my previous response to this thread, I saw my post was over seven years ago and it needed an update. It's no longer me, my boyfriend, and my husband with an occasional girl for him, we are now a poly family with two other women (and five children). 1) My boyfriend will now do it with any of the girls, but it has to be his cum. 2) No change - hubby will eat any cunt with any cum. (Am I the only woman that actually likes the word "cunt" for both the genitalia and as slang for a woman? It sounds so strong.) 3) Still true. 4) I'll lick Lora or Clair after one or both of the guys pumps semen in it. There's a totally different mind set for me depending on whether it's before or after I've orgasmed.

This is a perennial question. It depends on so many things. There are a couple of verities, however. 1. Once acknowledged, it can't be reversed. "Mom and Dad have special friends...with benefits." Nor can mom and dad do anything other than ask the child to be discrete. Being "outed" is a possibility. So the first question is "how mature and adult is the child?" In other words, can they keep secrets and do they understand discretion? 2. The real question is why you would want your child to know your sexual behaviors. Most kids think "Ewwww" when it comes to their parents having sex. We know we thought that of our parents. Yet our conception was surely not immaculate. There is a tension between being private and being truthful. What seems to matter most is how sexual matters are generally discussed in the home. Most homes, not only is sex private, but discussions of sex are closeted. Surely in such situations, swinging is just as closeted and needs to stay that way. What about the alternative? What about the home where discussions about sex were -- and are -- no different than discussions about politics or hobbies or the movies? The picture changes a little bit. Our adult daughter knows that we have special friends, knows the attend adult parties, and know that we have been on a lifestyle cruise and are looking forward to the next. Her view is that we are unique among parents --referenceing her friends--in that not only are we still married to each other, we are still madly in love and show it in so many ways. The question arises--she has asked--are "you two" (meaning us) so happy and secure because of your special friends? Or are you able to have those special friends because you are so happy and secure? We are pretty sure it's the latter. And while she has no ambitions at present to be in the LS--her current boyfriend is quite enough for her--she's paying attention to the fact that we _are_ content and comfortable with our sexuality.

When Mrs. cplnuswing is first penetrated, there is usually a short, sharp breath intake and a quiet moan which is accompanied by her eyes getting big and wide. I never get tired of that I was standing around casually chatting and flirting with a woman one time and she leaned in for a kiss and sort of out of the blue said "I want you to fill my mouth with your cum". It wasn't the words as much as it was the sudden and unexpected move from 2 to 10 and the husky voice the message was delivered in.

On our second date, the late Mrs. Alura and I agreed to never become angry when a question was asked and promised that we would always answer honestly no matter how long the discussion took. When we decided to have children we simply extended that consideration to them. Our sons grew up knowing they never had to fear our reaction no matter what question they asked. When they discovered we were regulars on Swingers Board, they asked if we were in the lifestyle. Laura was quick to zero in on their major concern and explained that we had stopped swapping for months before she stopped taking "the pill," and we started trying to conceive, simply because we wanted to have no question as to their parentage. We didn't feel we were "in the lifestyle" since it was not that important to us. We sometimes swapped partners with other couples because it was fun, and we did it together. We explained the difference between "making love" and "fun sex." We explained that some people would not understand. Consequently, their discretion was needed. We never worried. They asked if we swapped with "John and Mary." Sensing a "teaching opportunity," I explained that, when I was a teenager, I went to a dance school which was really "Dating 101." Miss Skilly taught us that one question that should never be asked was, "Did you kiss her?" It was a lengthy discussion after that, but both went on to graduate high school and university with honors, and never got in trouble of any kind. One is involved in what seems to be a permanent relationship. The other says he hasn't seen enough of the world yet. I'd still rather be the man who bought the Brooklyn Bridge than the man who sold it. "Honesty is the best policy," no matter how much easier one might think the alternative might be. When I visit Laura's grave, I thank her for our thirty years together and update her on "The Boys'" activities. I always seem to smile through the tears. Alura

They thought that because their kids had anxiety issues it would be better to tell them then not tell them? That seems backwards to me. That's just one more reason to not tell them. Why does my daughter need to know anything more than, "We are going out on a date night." If they have anxiety issues or not, it doesn't matter, that's something you would tell them even if not in the lifestyle and if that really was all you were doing. So just tell them that and carry on. I agree with what others have said, It really depends a lot on age and maturity of the child. My daughter is 6, so it's really hard for me to really understand the situation, as I have not been there. I still do no think we will ever tell my daughter unless she is in her 20s and has suspicions and asks us. I would not lie to her when asked a direct question like that, but no way would I bring it up. If the question was simply what are you guys doing tomorrow when you go out, then yeah, not gonna volunteer any additional information. Just, "we're playing it by ear, gonna go grab something to eat and then decide." No reason she needs to know any more than that.

The big differentiator is adult children vs. teenage children. Our adult children know. They suspected and we confirmed their suspicion. All were (are) OK. Teenage children we would not have told. Teens need time to decide about 'things' on their own.

Thanks for the update! That was fantastic you find such a great couple to play with! Your wife's anxieties are perfectly normal. I've heard various Catholics say things like "I'm Catholic. I can feel guilty about anything!" It's true! Seriously though, the religious aspect is a personal journey that can take time to adjust within. Not that it makes it 'right' in Catholic eyes, but there have been several popes that have openly had orgies, threesomes, and moresomes. It was common knowledge. For my part, the religious journey was in part a realization that there was no victim in anything we were doing. We have always ensured the people we are playing with are not cheating on anyone. We are not cheating on each other certainly. So, where's the 'crime'? It is also worth noting that the Bible has many figures who had multiple wives, concubines, etc. The idea of one man, one woman isn't exactly all that the bible says. Also, the term adultery...one of the commandments speaks against it of course...isn't exactly what we think it means today. You might want to research into this, to help with the discussion about religious guilt.

Talking Heads

Fundamental Law-- how old is your daughter??

I agree that what parents/Adults do on their time is really none of their children's business. Especially if they also interact with their playmates in the vanilla world (i.e. family barbecues, parties, etc.). That is just asking for trouble, for them and their kids. Them because, let's face it, unless it is something they don't want their parents to find out, kids are hard pressed not to tell a secret to their BFF(s). And then their BFFs will tell their BFFs and so on, until somewhere down the telephone game line, it happens across a child whose parents are not swingers, and then Kaboom! for their kids because when the telephone game hits the wrong kids, they are going to have a hard time in their social groups, especially in the teen years (those little buggers can be really cruel and relentless). We had a situation (since we haven't had the opportunity to meet the right couple to be more than friends with) where our teenage daughter (late teens) discovered a few adult toys by accident. That talk kind of went like: "We are older, yes, but we are not dead, and these toys just help add a little spice or fun to keep our physical relationship fresh and exciting". Upon which, she said, "Oh, I knew what it was.. my friend (when she was in 5th grade at the time)used to sneak her mom's out and run into the bedroom and say see what I found in my moms room! So i assume it is pretty common". Fortunately she didn't discover the whips chains and leather mask.... lol just kidding we're not into BDSM (not that there is something wrong with that, just not our bag).

Thank you for the support. I have a fairly new "favorite" partner who I am in lust with and it has been strangely difficult for me to come to terms with his interest in others. He is very discreet about his other "dates" but we are involved in a rather small community of people so I do tend to find out now and again what's going on and I have been shocked to find how jealous I am. Plus I have found myself lacking any interest in meeting new people, which I believe is exactly the wrong thing to do. Hubby is aware of my feelings and has been understanding and supportive and we are trying to expand our circle of friends so that I switch my focus off of my "favorite". I just never expected to react this way. I really thought I could maintain emotionless sex and this has thrown me a curve ball...

Lionheart is succinct and spot on; communication. When you think you're done communicating, communicate more. Keep communicating. Also, the very fact you are asking this question is great! It means you are conscious of the possibility of problems, and are proactively looking to nip them in the bud before they become a problem. This is very, very good! I would add; make sure you do things as a team. Even if you are playing separately, keep doing it as a team; make sure the other spouse always knows what is going to happen, and talk about what happened afterwards. My wife and I really enjoy that. It's like re-living the escapades. SASS has some great points too; She notes that she doesn't truly understand her husband's desire. Well, as a husband I can say this; *I* don't understand my desire to see my wife having sex with other men Seriously. I don't. I know even the thought of it turns me on, but I can't explain why. I enjoy her being able to play with other men, with or without me. I've come to accept I might not ever fully understand why, just that I do. I also 100% agree about loving many at the same time. I think it bizarrely illogical that we can love two parents, four grandparents, many kids, but when it comes to romantic love, suddenly we're incapable of loving more than one? That just doesn't make sense to me. I'm deeply in love with my wife. I'm also in love with a girlfriend from long ago, with whom I am still very close friends (but nothing sexual happening). My wife knows this, my old girlfriend knows this, everyone's fine with it. My old girlfriend loves me too, and so does my wife. My wife has had sex with her primary partner (other than me) probably more than a hundred times. They are in love. Not to the same depth as she and I are, but they are in love. I don't feel our love is somehow replaced by her love for him, nor replaced by my love for my old girlfriend.

Unfortunately, it depends a lot on where you are. My suggestion is always to take advantage of any free trial they offer and use that to search the site and get a good idea of how many people match what you are looking for locally (as well as check out their features). Then make a decision from there based on which one you're most likely to use. I won't promote a site that doesn't at least have some sort of free trial attached to it for that reason. There are new sites popping up every day claiming to be swinger sites and claiming to have hundreds of thousands of members. Looking back at your OP, you are looking for single females... your best bet is not going to be the internet. Most who have any success finding single females do so in their regular life or via vanilla clubs. Most single females (bi or not) aren't looking on swinger sites.... and unfortunately, most of those you will find (if you try to go the method I suggested above) are not real, so that's not even a good avenue. Some sites do more to cut out the fakes than others, but they all have them. AFF is probably the worst for being riddled with SF ads that are nothing more than promoting some girls cam, website or 800#.