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There's the pitch...the swing and {crack}...a long fly ball to deep center field...back, back, back, and that one is GONE. Home run out of the park!

I would write and ask the hosts your questions. 160 people seems like an awful lot,even if it is a mansion and they valet park. Sometimes people run unlicensed clubs and call it a house party. I think you might be better off going to Trapeze. If your friends are on the website you could share their profile with the hosts and ask if they would consider inviting them. If they are not on the website,I wouldn't.

Angie, I would say you probably have a couple things really going in your favor of having a good time tomorrow night. First of all, it sounds like Randy knows the "rules of swinging" and isn't going to place you in a bad situation. He is saying the right words anyway. Secondly I can feel the excitement in your words. Excitement is good, dread and fear are bad. That excitement will show on your face. There will be some trepidation and even fear there also, especially when you are going and when you first arrive, but if it is anything like our club experience within the first hour you will be feeling much more comfortable. Until you go to the play area it will be just like any other nightclub experience. I would say your chances of fulfilling your fantasy is probably pretty high. Especially if you hook up with another couple you allow the other husband to watch also. I believe that would open up more opportunities for you at the club. Have a blast and we will be expecting a report back as early on Saturday as you can get out of bed and get a cup of coffee. Figure around noon.

By the time my husband told me he loved me I had already left my life and my country and moved halfway around the world to be with him, so I can totally understand "knowing" that someone loves you even when they're not very verbal about it. BUT I don't think you're getting the non verbal signals either, the little passing caresses and looks that let people like cplnuswing know you're in love with each other and let you feel secure in the relationship. I don't think this is really about the big gestures, sexting or anything else, this is about a lack of micro gestures that show someone's true feelings regardless of what they say or don't say. In order to be a happy swinger, you have to feel loved, not just think you're loved, but feel it in the very core of your being, that's what gives the confidence to share your partner, because you know that that love is there. I'm sorry but I don't think you have that with your current partner and until you do, swinging will always be an uncomfortable experience for you.

We had an amazing couple who were new but dove right in, then after a while they said they were taking a break because he needed surgery, they subsequently deleted our ongoing kik chat and we never heard from them again. We pretty much shrugged and carried on carrying on, who knows what is going on in their relationship. I once went through a phase where I couldn't even stand to hear my husband comment that he found another woman attractive (which is especially weird when you consider that I'm bi and love looking at other women). I wasn't feeling completely comfortable and appreciated in the relationship so all extra curricular activity stopped until I was feeling secure and appreciated again.

GoldCoCouple covered it pretty well so we'll just add that we usually ask the host/hostess what they would like us to bring. If they say whatever you want then our go-to is a bunch of cupcakes. We figure they are individual so that you don't have to worry about someone finger banging the ones they aren't going to eat themselves. Lol. We also bring whatever beverages we will want for the evening with enough to share.

First: go with NO expectations other than having a fun night out with your SO. You don't need to be feeling any pressure, especially self induced. Just have fun...it's just a bar with dancing and other couples just like any bar...of course you will probably see more skin than you would ever see at a normal bar and maybe even watch what some people only do in the privacy of their bedrooms, but that's the point in going, right? Second: You're not interested in full swap at this time so even the slightest possibility of full swap is off the table and not going to happen. Maybe remind your man of this just so you are both on the same page. Never move faster than the slowest person is comfortable with. You are not comfortable with this at this time so it isn't going to happen (currently it should be one of your 'rules' and should not be changed unless discussed and agreed upon in the future outside of the possibility of it happening). Now, go and have a good time. It's okay to be shy, but at the same time, be nice. Say hello and be polite like you were taught. Swingers are friendly people and want to get to know you. There IS a big difference (and it's easy to spot) between shy (uncomfortable to be there) and not interested (I don't want to be there, go away). Walking thru the door will probably be very hard and uncomfortable to do, but by the end of the night, I strongly suspect that you will look back and think how silly it was for you to have been worried about it. When you get there, if you tell the desk that this is your first visit, they will usually give you a tour, show you were everything is, and make you feel more at ease with everything. Let others know that this is your first visit (great conversation starter). Usually, IF anyone is thinking about wanting to play, someone will mention 'what are you looking for?'. Don't be afraid, just tell them what you are interested in. Finding a single woman will probably be hard (they are called unicorns for a reason), but finding another couple willing to allow only the women to play is a very real possibility (if we were there and felt a connection, we would be game). Just plan on having a fun night out and you will do just fine. Most swingers don't bite (too hard and only if you ask) and are very nice and friendly. I think you will find that it was much more exciting than you expected...and it usually leads to some great sex when you get home (sometimes before you get home ). Let us know how things went and we will you a great evening!