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What sexual or swinging event do you remember constantly? Something so hot, off the wall, or out of character that it is etched in your memory for life. One of mine was at a hockey game with my wife and her friend. My wife was drinking and acting all alpha to her gf. At one point her friend looked at her with a frown and said "You would love to grab a strap on and fuck the hell outta me wouldn't you?" My wife's eyes glazed, "Yes I would". Screw the hockey game, we made a bee line for the toy store.

Our local health department offers it for a small paperwork fee. We haven't done it yet but plan on it. We have made that our policy for any bareback play. Mandatory recent (less than 2 weeks) clean STD test for EVERYONE involved.

We started with my wife's best friend. I was uneasy and asked why. Got over that and enjoyed and have had plenty of fun with them. Like most men I feared she would like sex better with him than me. They made the whole experience fun. You say you like him as a friend. What better partner than someone you enjoy in the vanilla life. You say you already did it with him, now let the experience open up. You should enjoy it not dread it. Have fun.

Time for a time out? If you are uneasy with a situation it is time for that talk. I know the talk can be as difficult as the act. Unless you and your husband have the talk you will always have trust issues. I say this from experience. Believe me you will feel better after talking. You can tell him what you like and what you don't and more importantly why you are uneasy being with his friend. If you took the advice and read the threads after searching the term friends, you will see so many that say don't do it and a few that say it's the best. Having sex with people you like and having fun with it. You need to search your own wants and do what you need. The best is when you and your husband are on the same page and the worst when your pages are in different books. Possibly your pages are in the same chapter.

There are two schools of thought about this (do a search for 'friends'). Some think that (and it really depends on the person/people) it's okay while others (us included) think that the risks far outweigh the benefits. If anything goes wrong...bad blood, he falls for you, things just go south, are you ready to lose his friendship and for your friends/family to hear about what happened? He also might not be interested when the offer is made. If you are SURE that the friendship is strong enough that bad things won't happen, then it's up to the two (three) of you. Otherwise, with how many guys looking to swing with couples, it's just easier to find someone who doesn't know your friends/family. Either way its up to you, only you know all of the details. We would rather make friends out of swingers than swingers out of friends.

That must have been a better Oprah episode than Tom Cruise jumping on the couch...