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There's a subtle difference again from hotwife, where there's no humiliation intended but the female takes the lead. This isn't something I get into much detail about on this forum, but in general, Mrs. E has always been the submissive partner. Having a conservative background, it makes it a little easier for her to open up if I take charge and coach her to where she wants to go. Even if she wants to do something, some anxiety will take over about her upbringing and why she shouldn't. It helps a lot to have me there leading her along so it's not all her idea. I know some people raise their hackles about power dynamics in sex, but this has really turned out well during MFM play, as having both me and her friend's husband leading her keeps her mind busy and it's easier for her to relax. Hotwifing/cuckolding is this whole other scary thing where she has to take charge of it all and that's pretty off the wall for her.

Well we actually did both. Met up with the couples wife. Very charming, and attractive!! Chatted for a little bit. We did connect with her husband through the phone, seems very nice. Looks like we got along just fine, and set up a second date this time with her husband towards the end of the month. After our good byes we went to get something to eat, and decided to stop by the bar. I was a little nervous but just like everyone said it's like if nothing happened at all Someone mentioned about receiving free drinks well.... I did receive 3 from the bar tenders LOL. Also made plans with one of them, that just wants to hangout with us for the Octoberfest in the Keys. Got overworked for nothing.

Stag and Vixen... I stumbled across this phrase the other day while surfing the steamier parts of the 'net. The definitions I found suggest that, while similar to the cuckold/hotwife dynamic, the "stag" is different from the "cuckold" in that cuckold implies a submissive aspect while stag does not. The stag is a dominant or equal partner who enjoys sharing his wife/partner with other men without being diminished by the act. One posting referenced the ancient custom of cuckolded men being forced to wear antlers as a sign of their shame, and described the stag as "reclaiming the horns" which I though was interesting. As the term rather better describes my own personal kink (and also touches on an interesting pagan religious dimension), I was rather excited to find this. I wondered if anyone else had come across this terminology or knew anything more about it?

What sexual or swinging event do you remember constantly? Something so hot, off the wall, or out of character that it is etched in your memory for life. One of mine was at a hockey game with my wife and her friend. My wife was drinking and acting all alpha to her gf. At one point her friend looked at her with a frown and said "You would love to grab a strap on and fuck the hell outta me wouldn't you?" My wife's eyes glazed, "Yes I would". Screw the hockey game, we made a bee line for the toy store.

Unicorns have wings so they can fly...

See? Queen of the bar! Let us know how it goes with the bartender.

Thank you so much for your response! After all the support from here, listening to my gut that something wasn't right, the dust settling etc... I'm over it! Definitely a learning experience that I have gained valuable knowledge in. I know that I am a vibrant, sexy, thoughtful, kind, passionate unicorn! Where in Washington? Club Sapphires is in Seattle area.

Sorry to say I've been "that woman" too couple of times. I wasn't really thinking in these situations, and if you had spoken up, I would not have been offended and in fact would apologize profusely. My husband is perceptive in this kind of situation and he usually gives me a nudge.

It's the weekend, time to go have a drink at your favorite place... Let us know that things went just as we said.

Why are you wasting more time on him? What is he giving you, what need is he fulfilling? Why are you even THINKING about doing anything else with him? You are his admission ticket, nothing more. Please, realize that you don't need him, that you are so much more without him than with him. Let it and him go! As I posted (just before this) in another forum about you: ...You and this guy are more f*ck buddies than even FWB...and barely even that. You are just his ticket to getting into someplace that (probably) doesn't allow single guys to go. You are doing the right thing and you will quickly find that you have your pick of almost anyone there. It WILL be okay and you will probably enjoy yourself more since you will be the one making the choices. Embrace your inner unicorn and just go for it. You are the diamond here (rare, beautiful and valuable)... You deserve better that a guy using you as an admission ticket. Stay where you are and you won't find what you deserve...

I truly appreciate all the support from you guys... so last nite I texted him Hi. I of course was at work. He texted back "Hey sexy" with a kiss, and some pics of his daughters and dogs out on his boat yesterday afternoon. Lovin eye full above said as well to tell him what I want. Here is the text I sent: Ya kno... I so much love when you share stuff like this w me. You are such a wonderful father to your girls and pets... makes you overwhelmingly, even more attractive, and sexy than you already are physically, speaking of which I have had a visual that I cannot stop thinking about... your masculine, fit, sexy, tan body on top of that hot young gal, Hilary... watching you ride her, her legs behind her ears, or bent upwards so you could penetrate as deeply as possible, seeing that ass of yours tighten up as you pumped your stiff cock into her wet pussy... I loved the sound you both made. I saw you quiver when you came in her ))). I could hardly keep my mind on her boyfriend. Needless to say I've been making myself cum every nite since then. Do me me a favor woulja? Fuck ME like that sometime.. pretty please. I know I'm not as young, but I'm strong and I can take it too. I still need to have my way with a Marine damn it! He answered back: Okay now I'm super hard after waking up 20 minutes ago you write the most sexual stories I love it and watching your body with him was amazing too, that's the part of watching people having sex, it's erotic. I really don't think he even knew I was alive when he was in the midst of doing her... but that part is ok. I told him today that there's a party I am going to next weekend that has a military theme. I mentioned I was going to get my own membership there, I can go stag or take him as my guest. He said he hopes he can make it. We WILL be having s conversation beforehand. The last 2 parties I ended up with the gal he was fucking partner and I wasn't really into them. I think this can be a sticky situation... I may just go stag because I'm mad at the fact that I put his needs over mine. How do you not hurt feelings. I shoulda said go with her... he asked if they swapped, they said yes. It's hard because each scenario is different and unplanned. This will never happen again! It may be that in time I'll find that we really are not compatible in this arena. There's such a grey area cause we are not a couple. I hope I can help someone else on this forum at some point:) thank U

In my opinion, the 'perfect couple' just became even more perfect. Even your husband agrees!

Bottom line, try talking to her. The discussion opened up for us when we were doing 69 and I mentioned that I always loved watching her give me head, and wouldn't mind watching her suck another cock. A couple days later we're in the car and when we pull into the driveway she goes "...did you mean that or were you just saying things in bed?" "I meant that." "I could be into that." Took us a while to get there from talking, but making sure she understands what you want is the first step.

One of my favorite memories is the time that my wife and I had her first full swap with another couple. Up until a certain point in that night, we had to been having a soft swap out with the other couple. Lots of wandering hands And oral between both couples. At one point my wife looked up and said "all right now, I don't care whose dick it is but somebody is going to fuck me now! " it was so hot to hear my wife be so blunt and into the experience. I promptly obliged and began to slide inside her briefly. I then watched another man have fun with my wife for the first time :-)

Lionheart is succinct and spot on; communication. When you think you're done communicating, communicate more. Keep communicating. Also, the very fact you are asking this question is great! It means you are conscious of the possibility of problems, and are proactively looking to nip them in the bud before they become a problem. This is very, very good! I would add; make sure you do things as a team. Even if you are playing separately, keep doing it as a team; make sure the other spouse always knows what is going to happen, and talk about what happened afterwards. My wife and I really enjoy that. It's like re-living the escapades. SASS has some great points too; She notes that she doesn't truly understand her husband's desire. Well, as a husband I can say this; *I* don't understand my desire to see my wife having sex with other men Seriously. I don't. I know even the thought of it turns me on, but I can't explain why. I enjoy her being able to play with other men, with or without me. I've come to accept I might not ever fully understand why, just that I do. I also 100% agree about loving many at the same time. I think it bizarrely illogical that we can love two parents, four grandparents, many kids, but when it comes to romantic love, suddenly we're incapable of loving more than one? That just doesn't make sense to me. I'm deeply in love with my wife. I'm also in love with a girlfriend from long ago, with whom I am still very close friends (but nothing sexual happening). My wife knows this, my old girlfriend knows this, everyone's fine with it. My old girlfriend loves me too, and so does my wife. My wife has had sex with her primary partner (other than me) probably more than a hundred times. They are in love. Not to the same depth as she and I are, but they are in love. I don't feel our love is somehow replaced by her love for him, nor replaced by my love for my old girlfriend.

In the last four years my marriage has been seriously tested and almost rocked off course and it has been somewhat "open" for 12 years. Early on, when he first asked me to be open, it almost broke me apart. But I was honestly curious as to how it would be and after months of contemplating I agreed to try it. We talked A LOT in those months about why he wanted to bring others in, what our expectations were, what are rules would be etc. I still don't truly understand his desire and motivation but I have discovered my own. I find that I really enjoyed some of the experiences we had and felt especially close to him again when we had so much new and exciting things to talk about. I feel my relationship is "secure" because he tells bears his soul and so do I. I believe love is a choice as well as a feeling and I am secure in his choice and his commitment to love me till death do us part and I also believe that the heart is larger than we think and is capable of loving many at the same time at the same intensity. I feel this way because after finding a male play partner, I fell in love with him, but was still head over heals for my husband. If anything, I loved him even deeper, while falling for this new guy.