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So we had our first hall pass experience. A male that is part of a couple and we have played with got a hall pass so he asked if DD could play separately. We discussed it and figured why not. I've been working a ton of hours so they had their encounter while I was at work. Dd took the lead and laid out the plan. She wanted to walk in, bend over the back of the couch, get nailed and leave, no small talk or anything, just sex. Dave (not real name) asked if she could wear a sundress with no panties for the meeting, so DD went and bought one for it. It went well and according to the plan, and both had fun. I was concerned how I would feel about it but I was fine, no negative feelings. Now DD wants to set something up for me, she started trying to pick a woman out for me, luckily I like her taste in women. Lol. Never thought we would end up playing separately; while fun, we both prefer same room full swap since seeing each other have fun is a big part of the fun for us. Just thought I would share a success story as opposed to some of the negative stuff on here sometimes.

As a single woman I am extremely suspicious. Most of the couple contacts I received ended up being the male half telling me he had a hall pass. I took couples off my interest and will only play situationally at parties.

We met a couple at house party last night. The wife has a hall pass. She calls her husband from her hotel tryst and tells her husband what happened, to his excitement. The husband said he has a Ferrari and he lets other guys drive it every now and then. It seemed to work for them. I am a little concerned for my wife's safety. We've only gone as far as separate rooms at times.

If you think that they are too small, they will get smaller. They only get bigger if you think that they are too big... ( . )( . ) Either way, they will get lower as time passes.

Our first kind of hall pass, we were in a hotel room with our SM friend we played couple of hours it was very exciting, when he was done he went to he's room he had, me and my wife went at it again because the excitement was very hot, we were talking about it while we were having sex, I asked my wife if she would like to go to he's room and visit him? She was exited about it and I said hi ahead have fun, even though thought of her been with our friend alone was a huge step to take for both of us since we have never done this before, so she went to he's room and had wonderful time hour and half later she came back to our room, I was anxiously waiting for her to tell me all what went down, so she did and turned me on very much so we went at it again, it was kind of bitter sweet though, because I would have loved to be a fly on the wall and watch her having just sex with someone else besides me with comfort and lust, but still was a great time, looking to expand that the next time maybe a overnight hall pass.

Same here. I once suggested (very naively) to a friend, who is the female half of a couple that frequently hosted parties, that it would be a good idea to have those "Hello My Name is ..." sticky tags, and her response was "have you seen the hair shirt on my husband?"

Team sport, doesn't matter who made the mistake. Nobody should be 'blamed'. All that matters is that you learn from it and don't make that mistake again.

Thanks for all the advice. Wife and I had a talk last night and agreed next time if all parties aren't on board, nothing happens. This situation was 100% my fault, not hers. I was actually happy for her that she scored a guy so hot!

Here is my two cents and it's not the greatest. Some people, predominantly women (but certainly not limited to) have a very difficult time having unattached sex. Particularly long term with the same partner. Luckily for you, your partner has a similar issue. I say lucky for you as he is obviously still very attached to you. Unfortunately for you, it would appear he is attached to his play partner as well, and she is attached to him as well. Apart from getting over your anger regarding his 'behavior' it would be time to reconnect with him. He is obviously getting something from this relationship. So the question becomes, what is he getting? This is where for me this train of thought derails. I have no definitive answer for you. I think time together without outside partners would be the best course of action. The question is will your SO really do it? How will convince him to willingly do it? To those to questions I unfortunately have no answer. Wishing you the best.

Put yourself in the woman's shoes. If your husband was cheating on you, wouldn't you want your good friends to give you a heads up? If she finds out, and it comes out that you knew all along, do you think she'll continue to be a friend? It can be done anonymously in many ways, but I'd have a tendency to alert her.

Dexter, I think you've been quite patient with the guy. I have zero experience in the BDSM lifestyle, but I believe swinging and BDSM parallel one another closely in the need for honesty, trust, and excellent communication. My husband would not take kindly to some guy - whether single or married - texting me with long, wordy conversations that made it obvious the guy would rather that the love of my life wasn't even in the picture. And the sexting/requests for XXX photos...that's just a dealbreaker there. But maybe that's just us. We have a few good friends with whom we might send an occasional "Hey, how are ya? Say hello to the Mrs/Hubby." kind of text, but we're quite sensitive about whether or not the other people have respect for our relationship. We don't play separately, and we make that clear. We understand that some people have different comfort levels in this respect, but if it becomes obvious that there's a lack of respect for our relationship, or if we sense that they find our relationship inconvenient for their purposes, we tend to back away from those people. Does this guy know that you're into BDSM? Does he have any experience at all with it? Or did you get an impression from him about what he thinks of it? I have to wonder if he might misunderstand the concepts involved, and may even be purposely provocative, trying to take you down a peg or two. Hopefully I'm not creating a suspicion out of mid-air, but if your gut is telling you this... It's just a thought. In any case, you might have the Mrs. let him know that, while she appreciates the attention, she's getting a little uncomfortable with the number and kinds of texts she's been getting. It probably should come from her; if it comes from you, it may come across as defensive, and may not stop the behaviour. If it comes from her, it should come across very clearly. Not sure if that helps at all, but best of luck with this.

We don't seek out singles, so no real experience there, but if we were to meet a married single I think we would want to meet the other half. As far as hall passes for ourselves, we don't have anything specific setup. There have been were we venture out on our own to meet and greets due to the other not being available. Only once did my wife play after and that was with friends (couple) who gave her a ride (pun intended).

The unicorns we play with are from couples we know, so when one of them tells us they can play alone with permission, we believe them because we'll see their spouse at another event or party eventually. I do the same when I play a unicorn. I don't think cheating entered into the equation. It's more of a practical thing that these are the people we know and have played with. But if someone I don't know tell me she or he has hall pass, I certainly would be suspicious, regardless of gender.