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Influenza generally spreads from the southern hemisphere to the northern hemisphere. 1. This year's flu season in the southern hemisphere is the worst it has been since the H1N1 outbreak that we experienced here in 2009. Despite use of appropriate vaccines, the case count and case severity have both been quite high. The US has had a string of mild flu seasons. We are overdue for a bad flu season, and it's shaping up that way. 2. It doesn't take sex to transmit influenza; however, an intimate get together or attendance at a house party more or less guarantees exposure if even one participant is infected. While the vaccines against flu are never completely effective, they are highly recommended. Costs are low, risks are minimal, and if you play you can more or less guarantee exposure. One more thing. If you experience flu symptoms, contact your healthcare professional immediately. "Tamiflu" (oseltamivir) is partially effective as a treatment--but it ONLY works if administered immediately with the onset of flu symptoms. Flu is different than the common cold. Flu typically includes fevers (colds do not); flu often causes muscle aches and severe fatigue (colds typically do not). If you think you might have the flu, see your healthcare provider promptly.

It seems y'all have been set back a bit, Cinnamon Swirl. I'd suggest y'all keep talking. Keep assuring your husband that he has nothing to fear. My late wife and I went through something similar. Years later we met a couple who helped us to put all doubts behind us. My best to both y'all!

Alura,thank you so much for your advice and encouragement! Wow, Luvin Eye Full what a stern rebuke. Of course I know that my marriage is the most important thing and I would never do anything to hurt that or my husband! I do understand his concerns and that is why we as a couple are not swinging. I do know that he feels my disappointment. Crushed was probably too strong of a word I will own that but at the time it was all fresh. To answer your question about things not going well we had one couple turn out to be just a man, a man that did not tell his wife about us and a bi male poising as a straight male. Anyway thanks for your advice and I will head your warning of not moving forward.

Another vaccination to consider is the Meningococcal meningitis vaccine. Meningitis is deadly and easily spread through kissing and close contact. There have been known outbreaks in gay bars, it could easily happen in a swinger club setting. In our state the vaccine is required for kids at 7th grade and college students. Hep B is also a required vaccination for kids. Hep A is strongly encouraged if you are travelling out of the US to the Caribbean or Mexico. Right now it's influenza vaccine time in the US. Get yours! Adults should also get the new tetanus vaccine that also protects against pertussis (whooping cough). Pertussis is actually pretty common and adults can transmit it easily to young babies who are at risk for death.

When you say things did not go well - what happened ?and have you really gotten over it as a couple? you say you understand your husband - do you? surly his emotional well being takes more of your time and feelings then letting yourself feel "Crushed" by his choice? By the way do not think that he does not feel your disappointment which makes it worse now for him. Now if you really want to ever get anywhere with him in this LS you are going to have to work out all problems 1st, then take it as slow as the slowest goes. The fact that you feel some disappointment is ok but feeling anywhere near crushed tells me you are nowhere ready to go forward. It's simple is your "desire" to screw some man/woman more then the "Desire" to keep your marriage? Because this feeling of yours left unchecked can and more then likely will start some resentment and on it goes. now if you want to talk about how you can help your man to feel better and there by help fill your wanting in this, then give some details and lets see if we can help. Good luck to both of you

Hi Gang, We've been in the Lifestyle for going on 5 1/2 years now, and we've played with couples, single females, and single males. We've enjoyed all aspects of these fun times. Lately, I've been feeling more and more excitement and arousal in seeing my wife being fucked by another man. It's been getting more and more interesting, and I have more and more feelings of compersion (and less "hey, I'm left out"). It's totally hot to watch her take another man, revel in the sexual feelings and lose herself in the pleasure he's giving her. Making sounds she has NEVER made with me, and fucking him for HER pleasure, not mine (although it's SOOO hot to watch). I'm not sure what has cause this rather interesting change of arousal and interest patterns, but I wondered if any of you have gone through this as well. No cuckolding here, but just when there's a guy she wants to fuck, I TOTALLY enjoy setting it up for her and watching (and participating) her be completely satisfied. The change from even Steven to loving when she gets it has been totally non-volitional and I wonder if any of you others, male or female, have gone through the same?

Hi all. My husband and I have been in the LS for about 7 months. Had some things not go as planned but got right back on the horse. Met this great couple that we did soft swap with. Set up a second date with the intention of full swap. Husband and I were both comfortable and excited or so I thought. Days before we were to meet my husband came to me and said he no longer wanted to do this lifestyle and gave me his reasons which I understood. He was scared of this changing us, of the unknown or us getting hurt. I could go on and on. Which we had discussed all of this prior to making the leap. I understand things change and this can be such a roller coaster ride at the beginning. I am so surprised at how crushed I fell. I was really looking forward to being with this couple. However; I do not know how to deal with the desire to still experience this. I feel like someone gave me a chocolate bar and right as I was putting it in my mouth it fell into the dirt. I am not sure how to just turn this off and be okay with it.

Like the topic said is there something you haven't done but want to do it and try it. I never did a guy with a Prince Albert piercing. I only meet 1 guy years ago with one when I was 19. It was not long ago I had my clit pierced, the ring style. I meet the guy at the Hedo. I was afraid that it would get stuck in my clit piercing and rip it off. I read old blog and piercing web site that it has happen before. So I gave the guy only oral. It was fun and a weird sensation that hard to put in words. Since then I never meet another guy with one. Still afraid but still willing to give it a try and take it off from my swinger bucket list.

I have a fantasy of doing a 69 with a hot girl as her (hot) husband does her from behind. As I lick her clit and pussy it becomes indiscriminate as to what and whom I'm licking and sucking. As things heat up they both cum and gush all over my face. My girl could be sitting on me as the other girl licks and sucks us... I've done this as the guy from behind as the two girls do the 69, but being the one underneath would really turn me on. You asked!

I've probably been around here too long, CinnamonSwirl, and posted similar things so often that many members will say, "What? He said that again??" With that in mind: My late wife and I made a pact on our second date that we would never get angry because a question was asked. The agreement served us well for the next thirty years. It removed the fear of talking about anything, including her death. I've written a memoir about her last day entitled, "A Golden Butterfly Fluttered By" and will be pleased to share it with you. I've copyrighted it and you will not be allowed to share it with others. I need you to send me an email asking for a PDF copy. I will attach it, without charge, to the reply. I think your marriage will be long and happy.

My ex and I had an old Victorian home, we renovated the bathroom. It's very distinctive. On XHamster I saw a shot of a woman's legs in that bathtub! But, unless my ex has lost 30 pounds, it's not her. I'd love to know the story behind that picture!

I'm not sure you need to own that "crush" was too strong. We are dealing with strong emotions here, all of them are not positive, and I thought your choice of words was perfect for what you were trying to communicate to us, the readers. Sorry for your first "clunkers" which was also a perfect word, thanks to njbm. It seems that one of the supremely positive outcomes of successful swinging is a higher level of communication than couples imagined. This may be, swinging or not, a result of your experiences. Hope so.

I think that a good part of lifestyle success comes from getting off to a good start and building on positive experiences. You guys got hit with a couple of clunkers. Keep the dialog open and you may have another opportunity down the road.

I am not a woman but I will offer advice that I have read from female members of this Swingersboard when similar questions have been raised. Ask a friend whom you know well and trust and who can also be trusted to not tell people what you are up to. Have her accompany you to a swing-club party. This trusted friend need not be a swinger. This is just so you do not appear to be alone.

My wife had told me stories that her and her friends have. Things guys never talk about. I wonder what they say about me.

I sent Julie the message after having difficulty starting the thread. It was a smallish invitation only party after a meet/greet. I had been on the bed with my date and I think he was there after with someone and actually just assumed I was interested, another issue I am having lately. Later I spoke to the host and he said same thing happened with his girlfriend and this and he had to stop and remind him. He said “they (he was half of a couple) were creepy that way.” I asked why invite them and it’s because that couple has a nice place they hope to use for future parties. I wouldn’t attend anyways and now question the hosts judgement. Passing on his parties. I am meeting too many aggressive/assuming men lately just because I am there or have conversations. It’s taking the fun away.

I'm going to admit the girls do talk. Not only do we talk we can be be more open than guys are. I think me and my friends can get pretty raunchy when we are talking. In talk, sizes are talked about. I think we all say size doesn't matter but in girl talk it is takked about. Maybe it's done for laughs, there is some truth to it. And guys, if you only went 20 seconds, we did laugh about it. We have joked about how much you ejaculted, how hairy you are,sounds you make, and if you are good going down. Sorry if this makes guys uncomfortable but I think we are more open than all your locker talk. BTW, my husband is the best lol.

Attractiveness is quite subjective. We've found that we've had a LOT more fun since we modified our selection process from finding the "perfect" couple to finding a "doable" couple. For us, this is recreational, we're not necessarily looking for people to introduce to our kids or take to an office party. We're looking for people who are attractive and fun. The advice about an on premises club is great. Go, be friendly, be open, and show your affection for one another. Its amazing how people want to share the fun when it's clear that YOU are having some.

I think a lot of people put in their profiles that they don't have sex on the first date to cut down on people expecting it to happen. That way if things work out and they want to, they can and all is good... but it's a whole lot easier to just say goodbye, maybe we'll see you later and end the night and move on when there's no expectation. Most people are NOT good at blatantly stating "hey guys, nice to meet you but there's no interest here." And for others, in a couples situation, it may give them more ease to be able to go home and talk about it more rather than to try to communicate non-verbally that they are/not into the couple before their partner commits them to something they aren't totally into.

I have had male friends tell me to stay away from a certain woman. I was told that she was a "dead fish" in bed, and then played with her a few weeks later. He was 100% right, she laid there completely silent, with her eyes closed, and didn't move. I felt like I was fucking a blow up doll. After about 10 minutes I just gave up. If a woman isn't into it, I have a very difficult time getting into it. Me and my wife try to never speak bad about anyone else in the lifestyle, and try to change topics when others do. Women may talk more, but guys do talk.

I'm pretty sure we do have a narrower definition of fun. Guys can get off pretty easily... if you get off if it was fun. Short of a woman literally laying there like a dead fish and killing your boner you're going to have fun. We women are bit more difficult... and if we don't get off, we probably aren't going back for another round. If a guy makes no effort to make sure I'm getting off then he's definitely "no fun" and not what any woman would want more of. That said I've been talking with a SM friend of mine about some of our experiences and he's shared a few that fell into the not so much fun category for him... he got off... and all would have been well but the good experience was then followed by the female hashing through drama and pillow talk that was less than enjoyable... that lead him to say the encounter was not so fun and not one he'd likely repeat...

For us guys, sex is like pizza... when it's good, it's really good, but when it's bad, it's still pretty good. I've been with some pretty dead fish, and still enjoyed myself. For girls, though, there's a lot of dead fish / selfish / untalented / jerk guys around. My wife has had many "no fun" experiences with guys. It's amazing how many don't even try.

Just because you go doesn't mean anything will even happen. Look at it as a weekend getaway that just happens to have some people you know being there at the same time. This way there's no pressure or expectations on her. After that, whatever happens in PS, stays in PS...

My wife love inside, she says she likes the feeling of warm cumm running inside and her play mate pulsating his cumm inside. Anyone else?? Wow, I'm dripping already!

I LOVE watching my wife flirt with other guys, feeling the sexual tension building, wondering who will make the first move. When we play with another guy I love watching her help him undress and vice versa. We usually play in our hot tub and my heart skips a beat when I reach down and find his fingers buried inside her already. The best is positioning my wife between us so one of us can take her from behind while the other plays with her clit. Or having her stroking both of us while we take turns fingering her and playing with her clit. It has taken years to get her to this point and she still has some reservations but I'm hoping one day to sit back with a video camera and simply record the two of them rolling from orgasm to orgasm.

You hit the nail on the proverbial head for us as to why the MFM threesome works so well for us. It is almost like a euphoric sexual drug for me when I see Mrs being flirty and getting sexual with another guy in front of me. The peak to this sexual high comes when she looks at me and asks me when I am going to join in on the sexual fun with her. She is totally aware of my arousal and really plays to the situation for myself, and the other guy. Totally and very sexually arousing for myself and the other guy when she is sucking his cock while looking at me and she stops just long enough to ask me how much I enjoy seeing her doing what she is doing. No, this is never a cuckolding situation. Nor is it ever a bi-curious or bi-sexual situation. Rather, it is an experience that myself, my wife, and the males we usually play with all enjoy together. As myself and the other male always agree that the Mrs is completely in charge when it comes to play (what she does or does not want based on her mood and arousal at the time), we all feel that it enhances the sexual experience.

I'm not a guy, but I can say that my efforts to push or "nudge" my now ex-husband were well-received, but not successful. When he was having trouble with performance issues, I encouraged him to seek separate play and more apart encounters, but it really didn't help. Matter of fact, I think it made things worse and made him focus more on his failures and challenges to the point of making swinging no longer fun together or apart. Can you flip the situation in your mind and imagine how you'd feel in his shoes - if he was encouraging you and pushing you to swing or make decisions and effort toward enjoying swinging more? For me, that would make me less interested and undervalued. Guys? What say you?

From my perspective, it would seem the more guys your wife is fucking, the less each one of them means to her in any way other than sex. Think about it, if your wife is having sex only with one guy she will get to know him, they can perfect their routine, they have an opportunity to perhaps, maybe, develop some sort of relationship. (Not that there is anything wrong with relationships; some people, like my husband, are fine with it.) But if she is fucking multiple guys, they are nothing but sexual objects to her (and to you). She may have get tremendous pleasure from it, as you should hope, but in the end they mean nothing. You, however, are the one to indulge her fantasy and the one she will love.

Hey kids Believe it or not, my bride and I have only been discussing the Lifestyle for maybe six weeks. The lead up time now, that took years. Not because of communication like you might think, it was health issues. She is an eight year survivor of Breast Cancer and she is pretty much just getting back to feeling good. I went shopping for some really sexxxy bodyware for her and we started talking. No drama, no questioning loyalty. Just "Yeah, that would be cool." and down the road we go. We've met a compatible couple with a lot of our same intrests and we are busy planning a visit to the Estate in the very near future. I gotta admit, my best friend is the coolest ever. Bless