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Let her be picky. There are SO MANY single guys out there in the L/S, let her find the one she wants. Don't bother with strip clubs...you may find a guy but not a guy with experience in the L/S. Stick to swinger clubs, house parties, meet and greets, etc. BTW, there might be more to her not being able to find someone...maybe she is just making sure that it's going to be okay and that you don't have problems with it. Take your time, there's no rush (other than you wanting it to happen...now!). Just enjoy the ride and don't keep pressuring her to get this party started.

Hello all, I’m a total newbie here and this is long so my apologies in advance My husband and I have been together for 18 years, married for 6. I recently discovered that he had a long time affair with another woman. He broke off the other relationship immediately and we have been going through the process of repairing our marriage - honest conversations, full disclosure, STD testing, marriage counseling, etc. Our sex life, which was basically nonexistent the last few years, is back to where it was when we first got together as 20 somethings. Between the reignited sex and our conversations, we’ve started talking about threesomes and various kinky scenarios. I’ve always thought about those scenarios in a hypothetical, fantasy way but I’m now realizing that it’s something I’m really into exploring. Obviously, we have work to do on our marriage to recover from his affair and we are both committed to doing that. But the deeper I think on it, I feel it was the hiding and secrecy of it that hurts me. The actually thought of sharing a woman with him or him watching me with another man drives me insane (in a good way). Is this a really bad idea? This is something I really do want, I know he wants it too, and I know we should take it slow considering we have other issues to overcome. But I don’t know if I’m being too naive.

Mouthwashes that contain antibacterials--phenol, chlorhexidine, cetylpyridiunium chloride--reduce bacterial load more or less indiscriminately. Generally speaking, most reduce gingivitis and plaque formation. Translation--they lead to healthier mouths in patients with oral/dental predisposition to infection. Note the statement "reduce the bacterial load". That is quite different from "kills everything". Killing bacteria anywhere invites repopulation with a different flora. It is possible that sufficient cleaning and decontamination of one's own mouth with a harsher mouthwash might allow overgrowth with a rarer flora, or even possibly flora acquired from someone else. We are unaware of such reports because no matter how hard one works at brushing, flossing and cleaning, there is always residua of one's own flora left alive in one's mouth, and it grows back quickly. We would not change our oral hygeine habits based on concern for repopulation.

Our Dungeon We are curious to see yours ...

Having hard rock and metal playing, along with some weed, helps complete the escape. Sex becomes a fully separate experience, away from the fact that granny is slamming cupboard doors in the kitchen. This behavior flowed into our group activities. No one ever complained about her selection of music, although I think it was out of 'kindness'.

And that's why I was and am so in love with my husband. It took me a while to give him the same, but he was patient, and never demanded or even asked for another woman. But when I finally came around, I found that I got so much more too.

As the saying goes, "There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those that can do binary and those that can't.

Music engages my mind almost completely which makes it a distraction while having sex. My wife feels differently. She likes music that has a lively beat while having sex. When it becomes a choice between here preference and mine, I concede to her preference.

What do you mean by "aggressive stance"? Are you talking a 3-some MFM or are you guys into cuckolding? We are not into cuckolding ourselves but I do very much enjoy my wife enjoying herself. The clubs or such are a crapshoot as you don't get enough time to get a sense of a person. Our best experiences in MFM have been from vetting people on the LS sites and in some communication before. My wife also involves herself in the communication leading up to a meet and we always meet first and see if we "click". That's been the best way for us.

Our first lifestyle experience was MFM, but actually it was mostly the bull and me playing and my husband watching. He was enthralled. After a couple of hours, I kicked him out of the room so that I could enjoy the rest of the night alone with my bull.

There are no rules in the lifestyle other than those that you make for yourself. My female half doesn't need my permission to communicate with other men and I don't need her permission to talk with other women. Of course other people here may have different views but it's really something between your husband. If you gave the other guy your social media information I don't see how it's his fault for contacting you.

A little harsh there, luvin eye. OP, work on your relationship. Perhaps counseling would help. The best of luck.

Pretty much the same advice - use a hotel room... never your place - he can get the room or you can but he should since he is the one getting the fun too - Best to use something like kik instead of txt. Do not give out your phone number to him and especially hers. Kik allows communication w/o phone numbers. - make sure he understands your rules and abides by them - If this is a first time meeting, best to meet in the bar for a drink and see if he is who he claims to be from his profile. She needs to make the final decision if she wants him or not. - Always us protection... never without.

I think using a hotel for your first swinging experience is a good idea. First off you don't need to worry about what the neighbors might think or incur any of the usual interuptions one experiences at home (phone ringing, older kids coming home instead of staying at their sleepover they told you they were going to do etc...). The last thing you need to worry about is the hotel staff. They have no idea nor do they care. I do think that you should be the one reserving and staying in the hotel room as opposed to going to the guy's room, just for the very reason you state. You want to be comfortable and relaxed and in control of the situation. If the other guy doesn't like it there are plenty of other men who would understand and respect your choices. I've had a handful of mfm experiences (wish there were more!) and the hotel room meet up I think helps keep your personal life in the vanilla world separate from your extracurricular activities. My opinion only.

Let me share my own experience, for whatever it's worth... My wife and I had tried swinging "before" and stopped when we decided to start a family. Some years later, our marriage hit a low patch. She had a one night stand, in part to break us up. It didn't work out as she planned. Instead, we reconciled, we talked, we rebuilt trust and eventually got back into a good place with our marriage. Later, we started swinging again and it's been great. I'd say you have to separate swinging and cheating in your mind, because they are two very different things. Cheating, for me, is something that happened when our marriage was weak and broken. Swinging is something we do now that our marriage is strong and whole. All relationships have their ups and downs. If you feel yours is in a place of strength, than do things that you enjoy together... including threesomes and kinky sex if that's what feels right for you. If, on the other hand, you have the idea that swinging will somehow prevent cheating, don't do it because it won't. My $.02. Take it for what it's worth.

I find the notion that swinging doesn't fix relationship problems a bit hypocritical. Strong, secure, flawless relationship is a great foundation, sure,.. but just how perfect do you have to be to try swinging? And would you even be interested in naughty fun if you were *that* perfect? ;-) Lots of swingers are normal (not perfect) people, with normal (not perfect) relationships. Also, problems in long-term relationships can be due to boredom and lack of communication. Swinging can actually improve these things. If you felt pressured to try swinging to satisfy your partner's needs, that would be a red flag, but if you're both willing, I'd say go for it!

Now the affair was wrong on his part but it could be he was simply wanting the things you say you'd like to explore. In other words, the excitement of someone different. If you're thinking the same way, which you mentioned you are, then this could be something you two will share and that will strengthen your relationship. Someone here wrote something years ago that I've always remembered. "Swinging means never needing to cheat again". I've always felt that was true. I once told my wife, "I don't want to cheat on you, I want to cheat with you."

I too like to peg not only my Hubby, but our guests as well. I don't bite down on the balls, but love to suck them. I do like my Hubby to take a cock in the ass like most wives do, but rather film it instead of directing. Guys do tend to suck our pussies better when being fucked with a cock (or dildo), for some reason, they can make us ladies gush... Laura Laura and Dave Vegas Nude Couple

My guy is a bottom only so I can control him. I like to 69 with him on top while the stud behind fucks his ass. I get a great view and can punish my guy's balls if he balks at getting fucked. I bite down on his balls and pull forcing him to hold still to be Impaled. I love big cocks fucking my guy's ass. I made a deal that if we swing then he has to take dick for me which is a hot turn-on. He is an excellent pussy eater even when getting his ass fucked. I also like sitting on his face holding his legs high in the air while the stud fucks his ass so I can see his cock rise and fall or even come as he is fucked. I bring my strap-on to the party and bend the stud over to balance things out.

I thought I was done too!! And I thought he was never going to be done. I lost count of how many times I came and it was really hot looking over and seeing that my husband was ready to go again! yup, we are definitely looking forward to playing with this guy again.

We recently enjoyed a MFM and I had almost forgotten how arousing it is to watch her really enjoying herself with another man. I thought i was done after round one and they kept going and it was just as enjoyable watching and hearing them together as it was participating. It has been a while since i got off twice in one evening but.......wow needless to say it was a great night.

Our local health department offers it for a small paperwork fee. We haven't done it yet but plan on it. We have made that our policy for any bareback play. Mandatory recent (less than 2 weeks) clean STD test for EVERYONE involved.

Without a doubt, the first time I watched my husband have sex with another woman.

My most memorable moment didn't even involve sex. We were having a custom home built. The builder I'd selected was about our age and my wife thought he was good looking. His wife was a complete knockout. We became more than clients and had become pretty good friends during the months the house was being built. One evening we were at their home. During conversation something was said about something and a certain man's name was mentioned. This was a man that my wife and I had swinging experiences with and we, instantly, knew that if they knew him too then we shared something special with them. There was a moment of silence as all four of us knew what had been revealed, then there were big grins all around. That sure expanded the friendship.

We've only had a total of four play sessions with the same couple, but our first full swap was very vivid. Mrs. E bent over one side of the bed and Mrs. E's friend bent over my side, both getting it from behind. I'm not sure who Mrs. E made more eye contact with, me or her friend while her friend's husband fucked her, but it was one of those dazed "desperate for cock" looks that I really prized.

Events that stand out most in my memory... The time, at the club, when a guy had my wife bent over a foot rest/ottoman and thrust into her so hard both the ottoman and the wife basically went flying across the room. We promptly decided to relocate to an actual bed... and four or five guys from the audience followed, and eventually joined in. The time, also at the club, when I was watching my wife in a threesome with two guys and another guy, sitting next to me, said how beautiful she was and how he wished he could have a chance with someone like her. I encouraged him to ask her, once one of her play partners finished, and sure enough he got his wish. Finally, my first time with the young lady who was my friend-with-benefits for about a year. Seeing a strong, smart, kind of sarcastic young lady suddenly look shy and hesitant as we kissed for the first time... just wow. Given how that whole thing ended, that one's bitter sweet but I don't regret it.

Wow! I mean wow! That's so hot! I hope we have experiences like this in the future. Keep posting!

An equal balance of MMF or MFM allows my husband and I to share. We both started with FMF and FFM, that's where our love of Peach juice came in, but when we bet MFMF or MMFF or MFFM or FMMF an ogry is our secret love over the last 13 years. Lubricants with sweat leads to all sorts of oral-genital-anal variety an a room filled with mattresses, or outdoors in the summer.

I like two guys giving me the attention at first, each at a breast, pulling and sucking my nipples, then alternating licking my clit and ass together while I watch them kiss deeply. Then a DP or both in my pussy for awhile, then me on my back, one in missionary or anal, the other behind him first rimming the middle, then fucking so all three of us are in sync. Use of oil or another lubricant (I prefer canned peach juice) is helpful on all three of us.

I took a g/f to a swinger's club. She didn't need much encouragement. It was much hotter to see her with others guys than try and find another couple for both of us.

Having had orgy experience before meeting my hubby, I have found that guy on guy really does turn me on, I have had several MMF MFM, FMM times before, and find that the position depends on the body style. It was no problem getting my husband to be ok with a stud in our bed on occasion, but the size (both body and cock) makes a difference on the anal. We have had no problem, BUT it helps that all three are athletic like us. We also last longer.

Would he be ok if you matched up with a pair of bi males for this? Hubby might also be ok if the person in the middle is female with a strapon. With the 69 thing also works with two women, & hubby doing the cock part of it.

Good lord this is making me wish my hubby was even a little bicurious. Nothing to add except to say HOT!!!! Wish I was a fly on the wall ;-)

I have been in the middle and the top in this situation a couple of times and I enjoyed it both ways. I can say that it does depend on the other male partner as to the enjoyment factor. And it does take a bit of dexterity...LOL

This is how we have done it. I have been in the middle and it rocks. Don't last long for sure.

I have been a party to it prior to marriage back in my college days. I am still patiently waiting on it to happen with my husband. Also more recently a few of the couples we mb with have done it while we got off. From what I remember and what I have recently witnessed, the pillow underneath in either direction the female is facing is a big key. I liked it from behind with pillow under arching me upwards bent over. The two ladies I saw recently, each one had their legs up past their shoulders with a pillow underneath. The first male was in sort of a power drive position thought neither power drive. They simply arched, spread, and took it what the second guy did. I did notice A LOT of hunching with slight withdrawal, more than thrusting, and all three were in unison with that motion. Also the communication was amazing. The middle men always ran the show. He did most of the work while the third (back guy) balanced and let him ride his penis and the lady rocked with his grinding. You would have to have seen her legs swaying & rocking) to understand what I mean. Obviously they had all done this before, it was quite beautiful to watch and the orgasms were amazing!

My first ever mfm the woman and I did a 69 while her husband fucked her from behind. We almost had to peel her off the ceiling. Just a thought.

It didn't do much for me but my husband said it was amazing being the middle (he also tried at the end). We also used a pillow underneath my hips which help with the positioning. The hardest part was the thrusting. If you don't get in the right rhythm, it's easy to slip out of the middle guy. It was easier with only the middle guy moving back and forth while everyone staying put. I would suggest trying this first before thrusting in unison, which takes a few tries. Good luck!

We have done it too using the position described by JandKinBoise. We have also done it with Jo lying on her front and being fucked doggy style. Brian has been both the guy in the middle and the guy bringing up the rear (pun intended!). It is a wonderful experience for all three parties although getting into the proper rhythm for the the guys to thrust in harmony together can be a bit tricky. If you haven't tried it you should.

We've done it several times but I've never been the guy in the middle. A few years ago we were seeing 2 guys that both liked anal so it seemed to be a natural thing to do. We only used one position. My wife and the guy would start missionary (it helps to have a pillow under her butt). I would come in from behind. It isn't the easiest position. One has to be mindful of any weight he is adding to the stack. I found it to the be a balancing act to some extent. Both guys admitted that it was the most amazing sexual feeling they had ever experienced. J actually loved it as well. As I pushed into him, he would be pushed into her, she said it was like I was fucking her with his big dick. I say go for it! I've seen porn where everyone is on their side. We just aren't built for that position, even with just the 2 of us.

I don't know how practical it is because we have never done it, but the wife wants us to try this really bad. Don't know if I'm ready for that yet.

DigginIt you are a wise man and really have a talent for reading people. My wife had to stay home and take care of her dying mother during her teen years - so she didn't have a normal youth. At 17 she got pregnant by a 28 year old man. Against her father's wishes she married this guy and had her son two weeks after her 18th birthday. She was a stay at home mom and wife until her husband suddenly died when my wife was 22. She spent the next 8 years stuggling to make ends meet and raise her son. She worked a lot and went to school and really didn't date much. During this time she developed a weight problem and blew up to about 250 pounds. I met my wife at a bar when we were both 31. After 9 months of partying and fucking on a regular basis, she got pregnant with our daughter. I did the right thing and stuck by her and we got married and lived a good life - even though we never were really in love. She ballooned up to about 375 pounds. I drank a lot and jacked off a lot - we had sex maybe 5 times a year for many years - she had zero desire for sex and felt unattractive. 5 years ago she had gastric bypass surgery and lost over 200 pounds. She now looks great. She feels sexy. She cares about her apperance. She is getting attention from men that she never got before. People treat her different. and the sex is off the hook - we do it at least 10 times a month and it is the best I have ever had. She spent all of her life either tied down with responsibility and/or a fat slob and now, at age 48, she finally feels normal and worthy. This is why I want her to get what she needs to make her happy. I admit that I never fell in love with my wife in the beginning but after 17 years I love her deeply and just want her to be happy - no matter what it takes or what sacrifices I need to make.