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Well, three out of five of the responses the OP listed are positive ones, one could go either way depending, and only one was clearly negative. Read through the threads here and that's consistent...some women are really turned on by it, some are in the middle somewhere, and some are turned off by it. The vast majority of society doesn't understand swingers either but that hasn't stopped any of us from doing it. Although I'm not into it myself, I feel the same way about this subject as I do that one - don't want to swing, then don't. Don't want to suck cock, then don't. But for those that do, they're grown adults able to make their own decisions, so more power to them if that's what they like.

She came by tonight with her gay friend. I like masculine men. After a minute with this guy, I wasn't interested. She must have sensed it because she said to him, "show him your penis". He did and I must say she listen to what I told her about what I like because this is exactly what I want. I took it in my mouth semi erect. Within a minute I had a raging hard-on in my mouth. She was very excited giving words of encouragement. At her suggestion we moved to the bedroom. I found myself kissing him is a little weird. But he was excited and wanted me to f*** him right there. That wasn't going to happen and I told him so. We continued sucking each other's dick. God he had a great penis. It ended in a 69. With me on bottom.. this is why I suck dick. It was the best feeling I ever had doing it. Afterwards he left and she stayed. She was excited. She had endless questions.

Mrs Doc seldom wears underwear when we go out on a "date", Usually an easy access dress, sundress or skirt/top and maybe (if its a chilly evening in SWFL) a thong. If we go back our place or their's and things seem to falter a bit, she'll approach the other guy, drop her dress or pull off her top and say, "lets get this party started". She has, on occasion, done the same to the other woman saying, "I think the guys would like us BOTH naked". It's never failed us!

This. It's not unusual for me not to come, and it's for the reason above...I'm so concentrated on pleasing her as long as she wants to be pleased by not coming too soon that in the end I don't at all. Doesn't mean I didn't have a really good time

Well, condoms suck so that's a big factor too, but I've experienced the same failure to launch both with and without condoms and with different people including on a few rare occasions, even the Mrs. A totally vanilla monogamous friend of mine has a saying like "three and forget it" meaning if you successfully repress the urge to come three times, then after that, forget it, not going to happen at all no matter what you or she does. So, I don't think it's just a swinging thing, it can happen with your spouse of many years too if you are really concentrating on holding back and trying to make a regular session into a marathon screwfest.

Padoc: That would work for us! She's a beautiful woman! Pebbles: Sounds like you were able to find another couple to overcome your 'problem'. Congrats and welcome to the club.

It is NOT an assumption and nobody will usually 'force' them self on you without asking permission first. Even straight sex is not assumed without asking permission. Swingers are among the nicest, politest people you will ever meet.

I really needed to see this thread. Thank you. My husband is interested in the whole swinging and threesomes stuff, I have no experience with it. One of my biggest concerns has been guys wanting to force the issue of anal or if it was like an assumed automatic thing when in a MMF three some. I have only recently started being okay-ish with anal and really that's only with my husband. Idk how I would feel about any other guy.

I'm just pointing the guy in the right direction Sun. I don't care how many dicks he sucks or how he does it. My point was that if he wants to suck dicks he'd be much more successful on gay sites or Craigs list. How that makes me anything other than honest defies logic. Boom boom yourself (whatever THAT means).

Soooo yesterday was a totally unplanned day that ended up with us bringing home, in the middle of the afternoon, a lovely couple from Colorado, they were in their late 50'2, early 60's. We met, had a coke, came home, talked for half hour and got naked in the RV and had a blast! At first I thought OMG, 60! Yippee... Then, after it was all said and done, I said "you've totally transformed my profiling of the 60 year old man!" Amazing! Then, a surprised had been planned by my hubby.....a 27 year old BBC! We had no problems getting the ball rolling yesterday!I'm pretty sure I didn't imagine or dream all of this soreness up!

Well, I had drifted away from the poly meetups in our city and our friends had fewer small social gatherings for nearly a year. A leading couple that hosted split up, then divorced. The dust needed to settle. Over a year later I'm hanging with the group again. I started going to their birthday parties, then a house warming party, then a local Burning Man festival. There are 4 of us guys that have been partners of partners (metamours) for 8 years. There's 3 women in the orgy core group. 1 has been in our pod for 6 yrs. The other 2....one year or less. So, there's 7 of us. I'm not officially dating anyone in the group, and the same for one other long-timer of the pod. We certainly feel honored to have been invited. It was their 2nd birthday celebration orgy, but our first time. There were 8 people the first one (3 men and 5 women!) The women would love to see some guy on guy action. I'd be more than happy to oblige, but only one of the other guys is bi, and he didn't want to play with me years ago, so without adding people, there will be no male/male fucking. We have had some discussion on a messenger about who we might add. It's so exciting to discuss it, but it definitely feels dangerous on messenger, even more so than it might face to face. Well, here's to hoping to lots of longevity for our orgy group! I'm kinda in NRE right now with the group, but also the women too, to some extent. I'm so having to refrain from starting contact with then every day online. I'm the only one that is "single". Err....I'm about to pop with excitement and anticipation! - I was with swinging couples till the age of 29, then had a few poly threesomes, but they were not super common. I was missing the swinger couples from times past, but now my poly pod is grooving like I had wished for in my early 30's. I'm 37 now. To top it off, I couldn't get a full erection. Then my 75% erection deflated after starting intercourse. I had a peyronies injury occur 3 years ago. It makes things more complex for me. But....I was able to give a woman an orgasm via oral! I couldn't get that done for nearly 8 years! Damn, I was relieved. ....whew.

I know, it's a little daunting, but . . . Our eventual solution was pretty simple. One of us got the partner of the other sex close and said, "Hey, I really think you're sexy. Would you like to?" She/he would either say to me/her, "Sure!" -or- they'd say to their SO, "You wanna?" Usually, within a few minutes we were all making out. Every great once in awhile, the person that got the question would skitter off. In that case, we knew they weren't really interested in going further that night. Either way, it was cool, and we'd gotten them off the dime.

We have no experience with it, but the idea of getting "completely naked," of showing all of yourself as you really are, is always a turn on. As another poster said, "we all have scars," we all have imperfections.

Not only did I like your post and agree with its sentiments, your use of the word "complement" in the correct context is noted and appreciated.

This December we will have been together for 25 years and I am the only one she has been with. Myself I have been with others before her. She has agrred to going to the green door in Vegas to watch. She won’t go to one locally being afraid of running into someone she knows. Also she had made comments before about other women. Just trying to walk softly. And she will watch threesomes porn. I thank you all for your insight and advice!!!

Put me on this list as well. There are times when I will stop (or pause) when I'm getting too close...just for a few seconds or so, and then I can continue. Other times it's because I'm focusing on just pleasing my partner. Usually it's because I don't want it to end and when I cum it usually signifies that the end is near. If I do this more than once or twice, sometimes I will get to where I won't cum at all. This doesn't mean that I didn't love the experience, quite the opposite. If a woman doesn't have an orgasm, does that mean she didn't enjoy the experience (please, nobody say yes here). If someone says that they had a great time, just accept it as a fact (unless you later find out that they never want to see you again). Sometimes giving can be every bit as good as getting.

One cannot help recalling the complaint voiced by Madeline Kahn as Lili von Shtupp in the movie “Blazing Saddles”. ... “I’ve been with thousands of men...again and again ... and they’re always coming and going and going and coming...and always too soon!” In the quest for total orgasmic control, we have achieved ... overcontrol.

How many time I have to say the same thing. Swinging REQUIRES and abundance of love, trust, and communication. Usually this only comes from being in a long term relationship of at least several years (there are always exceptions, but this is more true than not). That it's your boyfriend and it sounds like you are both young does not help in establishing the basic love/trust/communication triangle. Granted, most people (usually men) are somewhat obsessed when they are given the green light to start down this trail (they want to 'do it' before the other changes their mind), but it sounds like he is a little too obsessed. He needs to slow WAY down and only you can tell him that. 'Always makes me' doesn't sound loving and 'perturbed' sounds even less so. Sounds like he has forgotten how lucky HE is for having someone who is even willing to consider this (and doesn't sound very loving again). You may very well be but this is a total lack of trust. Once again, a lack of love and trust. I'm trying hard not to be judgemental and negative, but the bottom line is neither of you should be doing this right now. Until you can openly talk without either of you shutting down, until you both can shore up your relationship and increase the trust you need for each other, you need to at least put this on hold. Swinging is a magnifying glass: it will make a great relationship grow so much larger, but at the same time, it will make any cracks or weaknesses so much easier to see. Continuing down this path at this time will most likely damage if not end your relationship. Good luck and let us know how things go. We wish you the best.

So how did it go?

Lots of guys are "situationally Bi" My hubby was that way before I met him, then he found out that I like to see my male lovers suck a cock with me. I am one of those gals that asks, "You want some?" while holding a massive cock in a threesome. I agree that it is a great way to see how a lover is secure with his sexuality and by the way, all mammals are innately Bisexual, it is our society that generates the rules. My current husband shares my feelings and bisexuality.