Leaderboard

We’ve gotten to the point that we use sites like SLS to mainly check for events to meet people in the flesh, so to speak. When we do dialogue with people on those sites, we take it slow and and easy since we have no idea who they are or what the deal is. We have had people open their photos without us expressing any interest in them and then they demand we open ours. Red flags go up for us when that happens. Either it’s a Photo collector or drama is on the near horizon. Digital has some use but it’s not the end all for us.

paddoc, your process (guy looks, wife approves or not) was pretty much our routine after we'd been in the pool awhile. The wife always had concerns about her physical attraction (she didn't think guys liked her) until she actually was in their presence. And she hated rejection. So I got to be the one that took the rejections. The only difference for us was that if we were going to meet another couple (vs. a single man) I insisted the girls talk together - I didn't want to waste a meet/greet night on a 'oh, sorry, the wife couldn't make it, she's sick, but I'm here!' I found that if the girls talked, even briefly, the chances of an actual meet skyrocketed.

That describes it exactly I think. And it has certainly brought on some examination! This is one area where I am thinking more like I would expect a guy to! Lol...we are certainly talking and exploring the things this brings up. I had not thought so much about the confidence thing...wouldn't a guys confidence be better since I am going home with him? That's what I initially thought...but likely that's not the case. For me, seeing him thoroughly enjoying the attention of another woman was strictly a turn on..I asked for any new things that she tried that I could learn. It didn't occur to me to be jealous! But obviously he is wired differently! It's funny how after 30 years together, there can still be things in there that we don't know about each other ( or ourselves!)

My wife liked to come in a nice outfit, such as a skirt and a button down blouse that she could slowly unbutton one at a time, until it was wide open, revealing her bra (if she was wearing one.) Then, she always brought a nice piece of lingerie (Christmas was a particularly good time for that stuff) to change into at the appropriate time. Me, like the others, nice slacks, button down shirt. Boring, but about as effective as you can get.

With our first time not that long ago I know exactly what you mean about mixed emotions and being different than you imagined. We still have mixed emotions, but are both completely sure that we want to continue. Over the years we've obviously exchanged fantasies and most things have been covered and while I don't class myself as bi, I do appreciate another woman's body and although nothing was discussed before meeting about doing anything bi.....it just happened......more mixed feelings, because I'd be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy myself. Communication is key and as we've found out its key at all times.

Warned you about teachers...

At a hotel take over and meet and greet 300+ miles from home, we ran into our former Lutheran pastor and his wife. Initial shock but was fine and fun. We didn't know pastor's wives had that kind of lingerie. LOL. Julie

Have also run into a former teacher. It can be a shock, but also cool to know someone else shares a secret interest.