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I suspect a lot of profiles on SLS are men doing it without their wife's knowledge. I have had a few chats turn into texting, then when it came time for the wives to chat they vanished or made up excuses.

Deep down it's one of my biggest concerns (about myself), but I try not to let it get in the way. Confidence is so sexy! Insecurities of any kind are not. So no matter how you feel inside, act like a winner! I find that swinging actually helps alleviate these anxieties because in the end we are all real people and no one is perfect. Exercise helps too because you know that you've done your bit and you are the best you can be.

We agreed to not log into our SLS account for a little while for one reason...lack of time due to having already made a few recent contacts with couples that we have had chemistry, and are currently dating. Limited to only a few days a month it was starting to get overwhelming trying to schedule so far ahead, that we didn’t want to put off couples by telling them that we can only schedule a meet in the next few months (that would turn us off as well). It doesn’t help that we don’t play on 1st dates. But that is our comfort level, and we “are” finding what we set out to when we started our account (FWB). We prefer a small circle of friends over a notch in the bed.

To be honest, I’m not sure what it would take for me to love my body. I say time, but that’s immeasurable and surgery isnt always the solution. I had breast concerns after nursing my children for 15months total. I researched and went ahead and got a procedure (breast lift and reasonable sized implants) hoping to change my outlook on myself and boost my confidence. I got the breasts I wanted...with the cost of having huge scars under my breasts, up the underside and around my areolas and am now ashamed of the scars. I suppose the grass isn’t always greener and presumed remedies don’t always remedy an unhealthy personal outlook.

We asked for profiles after reading your post. They said they don’t have written profiles for the other couples. Three of the couples are married and the other couple is younger than us and single. They know our concerns with the wife playing with other women and said she shouldn’t worry. They didn’t have any plans of how things would go and again reassured us that they would steer the party in the right direction. They had bought some games as a party starter. I think we are excited.

You situation is very apparently making you bitter. I do not know that it would make you feel any better for me to say that the world of swing in which my wife and I live is different from the world you describe. I have paid attention to your earlier posts. You need to straighten things with your husband.

Bingo, Erik 13. When the “rubber” hits the road, the men cannot make a date to meet because they didn’t tell their wives they were trolling for dates. I wish these guys did not bother us, but we can generally sniff them out. No certs is one giveaway.

Deep breath and no pressure. IF anything happens, then just go with it. If you put pressure on either of you, then it becomes less fun and more work. Go and have a good time and then go home. Instead of pressure or nerves, think antici...pation and excitement. Also realize that during and afterwards, your brain will most likely be telling you that this isn't happening when in fact it is. Just live in and enjoy the moment of spending time with someone you love.