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The wife and I have been here a few times and always had a great time. This last time was for the Valentines party and was it packed!! We got there around 10pm so the only tables left were in the smoking section back by the pool table . Anyway, they had a mix of music but played WAY too much hip hop for my taste . Around midnight we moved to the "play" area that has several beds (attendant changes sheets), 3 beds with large viewing windows, a sex chair, a clit vibrating saddle, a HUGE multi-couple beanbag chair and a sex swing, The swing was free so I immediately took the wife to it and undressed her. Now, we are new to swinging so she just allows me to fuck her in front of others on the back beds so her fucking in the middle of the room on the swing was a BIG step. Anyway, I put her in the swing and she leaned all the way back where her head was pointing to the floor. I brought a lipstick vibrator and started to play with her clit while eating her out now and then and she was going crazy . People started to stand around us and I LOVE showing off her body. She has D size cups (man made) and a nice landing strip that I was showing everyone that wanted to see. A couple walked to the front of her and the woman leaned down telling her she was sexy and touching my wife's breast.....she didn't object and I could tell she was cumming. WOW, what a HUGE step. I then took her to one of the beds and fucked her till she came again along with me. WHAT A NIGHT!! We got home about 2am and hit the hay but the next day she said she got up around 6am so horny and used the vibrator again......I think she's starting to loosen up.....what you all think? Also, I highly recommend this place so if you're in SA you may want to stop by and have some fun

Every person/couple in the lifestyle shares a common experience: we began. The "why, what, and how" is unique for each person and each couple, but the act of taking that first step binds us together. The anxieties are predictable, the concerns heartfelt, and the physical/spiritual/emotional tensions all surface. Looking back, the angst is not about sex, it's about intimacy. Looking back, the angst is not about 'dating', it's about 'relating'. Looking back, the angst is not about what we do, it's about who we are--and who we aspire to become. That step forward into the lifestyle, at least for couples, is all about the foundation of their relationship, the meaning of sex(ual exclusivity), why they (we) chose to live our lives together. Candidly, that's really scary territory for many couples. Surely it was for us. Yet we began. We began our journey into "alternative lifestyles" with our first trip to a nude resort, now more than two decades ago. Exposed. Vulnerable. That, in fact, is the root of the angst. That by joining an alternative lifestyle--nudism, swinging, whatever--that somehow will place your relationship with your partner at risk. It is a common refrain that swinging exposes every fault in a relationship, and yet those who stay in the lifestyle are stronger for it. Swinging does not expose the faults--the faults (we all have them) were there and simply expressed differently. Why is "beginning" a courageous act? Why do vanillas say "I would never be so brave with our relationship?" Remember the wisdom of Thucydides, "The bravest are surely those who have the clearest vision of what is before them, glory and danger alike, and yet notwithstanding, go out to meet it." Those who begin in the lifestyle have bravely done the hard work of introspection--not of themselves but of the relationship with their partner. What does that relationship mean, what do I bring to it, what does my partner bring to it. Some who step forward will step back. Others who step forward will continue. Yet all who take that first step, become 'newbies'-- they have earned our respect. They have asked themselves what they mean to each other with greater clarity, requiring greater transparency, and have started to find answers. What surprises so many newbies, yet us utterly unsurprising to those who have been in LS for a while, is the degree to which couples "fall in love with each other all over again". Why that should be is a topic for another time.

The only thing I'm looking at is if she is happy and having fun and enjoying herself. If she is achieving all of those things with a guy who has a big cock, then great. Same goes for guy with average size cock, same goes with guy with small cock, etc. It's not just about the cock, it's about the whole package and the experience.

Rob is 56 and I am 35 with a 20 year and 3 month age difference. We definitely have had troubles connecting with couples at times when the other couple are about the same ages. With 55-55 age couples, the women seem to be threatened (?) by me and the men Rob's age can be pushy to get going with the sex. Rob thinks younger women my again can be concerned that he is their father's age and are turned off. We have better success with couples who in their 40's to split ages between Rob's and mine. It's more difficult than we ever thought it would be for two couples (4 people) to all connect and get along with each other in the lifestyle. Julie

JamesCurious I have read "Divine Sex" completely and have started to reread it again. I applaud you for opening up to your wife with your thoughts and feelings. Even if nothing else happens, the improved communication with your wife will certainly make the two of you much stronger. While my late wife could not wrap her head around "Sex outside of marriage" we did talk a lot. I have since remarried and my now wife and I communicate very openly. No, we are not active in the Lifestyle but we talk about it almost all of the time. I believe it is all about communication and getting past all of the misinformation that exist about those in the lifestyle. I wish you the best! ifonly1

People always want to make this so much harder than it needs to be: ASK THEM. Say something like "we really enjoyed meeting you and wanted to get to know you both better. Tell us about your style of play and interests in general". Either they will or they won't. Either way you will know what you need to know. Good luck.

My wife and I recently returned from a vacation at a lifestyle resort. There we meet a sexy and super fun couple. The unfortunate thing was we really didn't get a chance to get to know them. We arrived and they departed two days later. We really only had a few hours to talk. Since returning home we've been chatting a little. The issue is we're struggling with keeping the conversation going. We had such limited time to get to know them we really don't have much to say. We want to get to know them. We want to know more about their style of play and interests in general but it's hard when we're basically starting from scratch. Any ideas on how to keep the chat moving along? Or, should this happen easily and the fact it's not is a clear sign it's not for a reason? Time to move on!

Swinging is all about honesty, trust, love, communication. Cheating is the exact opposite...deception, disrespect, sneaking, and lies. We want good honest couples that we want to be around and have a good time with. We want to be able to trust them the same way we trust each other.

It sounds like a great setup! I would just utilize the online sites like SLS or whatever is most popular in your area and go from there. I think if it was me though, even though I had a great place at home to host, I still would set up initial meets somewhere public like a restaurant or bar. Not everyone you meet is going to be compatible, so work on getting your circle of compatible swinging friends built up and then use that to host some great parties

When I was in the service I was stationed in San Antonio and loved it there. My daughter and her husband lived in SA while he was in college heading for the ministry. We visited over a holiday weekend, took them to dinner Saturday night and claiming exhaustion from the trip, dropped them off at home, went back to the Omni, changed and headed to Players. We had a wonderfully sexy evening which included several other naked couples on a bed and multiple orgasms. Next morning at brunch the kid said, "Dad, didn't you sleep well? You look more tired than you did last night". Mrs Doc nearly choked on her bagel! I agree completely, Players is a fun club. Our advice to the OP is to recognize that swinging is an erotic journey you two are on. It sounds as if your wife is starting to really enjoy the trip.

We met friends from a Bliss cruise in Texas and New Orleans. Offer to meet for a long weekend in a mutually convenient place. If they say no, you know where you stand and you tried.

Fairly simple. You have had a chance to meet. You have likely decided that you want to spend more time with them. Send a note asking if they would like to get together for a weekend. That might seem forward. The worst they can say is "no". When we did this, the response came in 24 hours: "Are we coming to see you guys, or are you coming to visit us, or are we meeting somewhere? Our calendar is good for the weekends of...how about you? Can't wait to see you!"

Are you planning to meet again? If there's interest on both sides then just slot a date in your diaries and from then on the conversation should flow easily because you will all want to build up anticipation and excitement. If you or them are not interested to meet, and you haven't identified any other common interests, then I'd say that ship has sailed and move on.

We haven't crossed this bridge yet, but I can tell you that my wife has had all sizes prior to marrying me 20 years ago. One of her previous boyfriends was very big. Bottom line: there is a whole lot more to attraction and pairing up (mating) than size of the unit. Most women look at the big picture and how all the elements add up from personality to humor to body and everything in between.

Sexy turns me on. If you feel sexy you will look sexy. No one of us is perfect. I would like to have six pack abs and a beer can thick cock.

So my 2cents worth here - Yes he raped you - So be pissed off as much as you want ( at him only ) This last bit of your post tells you alot - lets have a look at it. "I can't get over feeling like I have no reason to complain...I mean, I DO choose to have sex with other men." Yes and your own words say what - YOU CHOOSE - not you let men choose to have sex with you with out any input or refusal by you. "If I so willingly give my body over to other men, why should it bother me that someone took advantage of me?" Because when you do give your body over its YOUR CHOICE to do so - not just there's " I hate drama, and part of me wants to forget it and stop bringing up the drama internally." Look the "drama" is real and you need to go though the emotions of being at the very lest used ( and at worst raped ) Many years ago one of my kids who was about 5, went to a family party with her friends and their parents - the parents had the kids all in one room and set them to bed at about 8:30 at night - at around 11pm some pedo went into the room and abused her orally - she was sacred but told the older girls once this pig had left the room ( woke her up and told her ) the older girl got the whole lot of the kids out and to the parents and told the mom - stunned and upset the mom said they needed to leave and half way home told her husband what had happened, drunk and full of rage he went back and nearly kill the pig - we were awoken by the police asking us to come to the station and then found out what had happened . Any way my point is the husband (our friend ) that took our girl with his and that had done everything he thought was right to keep them safe felt like he was to blame because they were in his care. - Well when i got to see him in the morning he was full of tears and was saying sorry to myself for letting it happen - I told him this and it is true for you as well - He did the same as i have done when his kids where with us = He is not to blame the sick mind of one man only is to blame and he must tell himself every time that it comes to his mind ( that it was some how partly his fault ) Just as one man thought he could do that to you as well - it was never your fault - be pissed at him if it helps tell the world if that helps but never say to your self again that some how it was your fault because that is just not true. Now that happened 22 years ago and every school holiday i still find myself shaking and upset - so it takes time for everyone. "

I posted my first story and will the second. I showed her the second, and she said that she didn't like the language and that it lacked some romantic feeling. The content, though, she had no objection to! She challenged me to write another story, but with nicer language and with the romantic vibe she suggested. Challenge accepted! As far as the homosexual issue, I read in 1co6:9 homosexual people (in many versions male) won't inherit the kingdom of God. Im not sure what that means but im sure it will be revealed in time. I'm reading Divine Sex (mentioned in an above post) and am finding it very interesting. I'm putting in a lot of thoughts in the margin so that when I ask my wife to read it, she'll see that I've given the book a lot of careful thought. Also, I asked her not to judge me or reject me for my desires or my thoughts and she agreed without reservation. I know she loves me, and she says that she doesn't share very well with others. Anyway, onward and upward...

Thank u all so much for your well chosen words. I totally agree with the trust thing. I think that's the thing to work on before anything else. My other problem is intoducing the idea that maybe we've been sold a particular interpretation of the bible based on a bias of the time. The idea that what's in the bible as written might just be not what we think it says bothers her. We have a gay daughter and we'VE had to change our perspective A LOT over the last 3 years to accept that God still loves her even though she's gay. I'd not want to know a God that sends her to he'll because she loves women! And I think my wife thinks the same way, even though she would not admit it. If the interpretation in the bible is wrong about gays, then what ELSE is it wrong about! My wife has a labial cyst at the moment (painful!) so I'm leaving her be so she can recover. After that I might give her the next story I've written. Either it will go well or very, very bad! Also, I might post the stories, see what people think. All of this is going on while I'm publishing my latest novel. I'd shamelessly promote it here, but I don't want to out myself!