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Quick update, I know you've all be on the edge of your seat waiting to hear what happened next. We had the opportunity to get together with our friends last Friday. I had expressed in our group chat that I was planning to slow things down. I wasn't sure where that stood to be honest because I never received much feedback. It was as if it wasn't really an issue to her. Even though she never really expressed an option on the topic I decided to follow through and slow things down. I slowed things way down, half speed and I would conclude it was a huge success. She was more vocal while we fucked than she had been in the past. We fucked three times in the same night (I didn't cum every time, we would take half hour/hour long breaks as a group) and that hadn't ever happened before. I also received more flattering messages in the days that followed than I had received in the past. She expressed just how much she had enjoyed herself and said that they couldn't wait to see us again. I feel like it's pretty obvious my slowing down lead to her enjoying herself more than she had in the past. So thanks for helping a fella fuck a little better. At the end of the day we all just wonna be able to fuck a little better, right? :-)

We are talking about Hedonism. That means Jamaica. This is not intended to apply to other Caribbean islands. Since people have asked, here’s a couple of things about arrival and departure in Jamaica. We’ve been going every year since 2006. (Not to Hedonism yet, though we have visited.) You will arrive at Sangster International Airport, Montego Bay (MBJ). It has improved 5,000 fold over the last dozen years. Used to be pretty primitive, but now it’s really nice. Be prepared. Get an immigration form on the airplane and fill it out – ONE PER PERSON, not per family like the US. And if the flight attendants try to tell you otherwise (United really need to train theirs better), just insist. When some of them tell people one per family it really screws things up and causes bottlenecks. You MUST have that form filled out before you hit the immigration hall. Fortunately there are plenty of staff checking and assisting along the way. I disagree that it is too crowded and slow in immigration – these days. It does vary some by day of the week as with any airport, so try to plan travel on off peak days if you can. And yes, as with any airport it varies with the amount of aircraft arriving at any given time. BUT it’s no worse than any of the US or UK international airports and a lot better than many of them. They have a butt load of desks and most of them are open most of the time. Also they have had self-serve kiosks for the last 3 years. So you scan your passport and answer some quick questions, it takes your photo, you get a receipt and are prescreened. (It’s a lot like a US Global Entry kiosk.) So when you get to the agent’s desk it’s a breeze. It can feel like a long time when you are standing in line and itching to get to the beach, but it really isn’t. They are actually very efficient. It is a long walk from the gates to immigration, but it still leaves places like Chicago in the dust. The “VIP” lounge. This is run by an independent private company. A friend of ours works there as it happens. It is called Club Mobay. There is also one at Norman Manly in Kingston (Club Kingston- imagine that!), but not at Ian Fleming in Ocho Rios. Yes, there are 3 international airports in Jamaica – remember that for the trivia competition at the pool! We always use Club Mobay for departure. $30 per head and well worth it. Priority security lane and a great lounge with free drinks and food, etc. (It’s by gate 12.) And as far as I know it’s the only VIP style lounge there. So unless your airline gives you passes with a first class ticket, you have to pay the $30. It is not free with any credit card or mileage card. We usually book on line well ahead of the trip or with our resort booking and they do it for us. If you leave it to the last minute you might find it is fully booked at certain peak times and not available. Regarding using them for arrival, my personal opinion is forget it unless you need physical assistance. Frankly it does not buy you much for almost twice the price (you can only get departure or both not just arrival). And there is no actual arrival lounge. By the time you have stood in a corner of the hallway waiting for your group to collect before they walk you all the way at the pace of the slowest person, you can be through immigration anyway, even with their VIP lane. Even if it is your first time, most of us know how to follow a crowd. That being said they are a great company. Customs is also a breeze, you are most unlikely to have anything to declare anyway and they have red and green lanes like anywhere else. The most we have ever had to wait is about 3 couples ahead of us – maybe a minute or so maximum. Usually it’s pretty much straight through. Once you walk out into the arrival area you will find your resort’s welcome lounge right there. Ignore everyone else, they are just trying to part you from some of your money. Anything they are peddling you can get for less later. The resort staff will be expecting you and will tag your luggage to go to the resort. As far as I am aware all the all-inclusive resorts provide transfer to and from the resort included in your booking. Apparently some people are taking private cabs and paying for it. Beats me why. We have never waited more than 10 minutes for the shuttle – which can be from a small min bus to a full size bus depending on the number of people arriving at any given time. Very occasionally it could be a car if there’s only you. All are run by reputable companies, the biggest being Juta. Tip your driver a few dollars when you get there. They humped your bags on and off the bus and probably gave you a guided tour on the way. They are not resort employees. Also the uniformed airport porters will lug your bags out to the bus and back again to the airline desk when you leave. It is customary to tip them $1 per bag. Don’t be cheap, it’s worth it and you just spent thousands on your vacation for crying out loud. It is interesting how begrudgingly cheap people can suddenly become, trying to save literally a couple of bucks. Take a beer – or two – for the ride. The resort lounges usually have refreshments. Unless you are going to somewhere close like the 3 Sandals resorts or Riu in Mo’bay, it’s going to be about an hour and a half to 2 hours ride, but the roads are good these days (unless you are going to Sandals South Coast, which is up over the top on very rural roads.) They don’t exceed the speed limits these days, so don’t expect them to. Too many speed traps. Since they legalized pot they have time to enforce other laws. A typical speed trap has both Federal and local police AND Jamaica defense force very visibly packing an M16. Not a good idea to mess with them. They try not to interfere with tourist buses unless it’s a gross violation – not good for the tourism industry which is by far THE major source of the Nation’s income. Very often they will make a pit stop about half way for restrooms and more beer or whatever. Oh yes, and of course you can take your favorite vibrator. Put them in your checked bag and you will not even get a knowing smile and wink at outgoing security. Like doctors, they have seen it all. We always have some small toys, lubes, etc. in our bags. Jamaican customs don’t care and they don’t ask if you have sex toys!! - only the usual fruits, commercial pharms, samples, firearms, etc. like anywhere else. Just don’t try to smuggle in your pet. Leave that “emotional support dog” (sure it is……) at home. BTW: While pot is freely available and basically legal during your stay, don’t try to bring any home, you will most likely either get caught leaving Jamaica or arriving home - not worth the risk and you don’t want to see what the inside of a Jamaican jail looks like. Hope this has been helpful. It has definitely got a LOT better in recent years. One last thing. It’s safe in Jamaica. There are parts of just about any big city in the world you just don’t go to unless you are stupid. Same applies. You are not going to be dumb enough to rent or drive a car yourself. Take tours and cabs ordered at the resort – not for safety but for a reputable company and reasonable price. We have gone places on our own and never had a problem. Just don’t go to the wrong places!!

My wife and I got into the lifestyle recently, about last six months. We did a ton of research. Actually, this forum helped to answer many questions we had before we ultimately decided to jump in. Jump in we did. We made a couple of profiles on free sites, and began talking to some couples online. At first, we really didn't know what we wanted, other than to spice up our sex lives. The first couple we spoke with, in hindsight, was pretty aggressive. I won't go into details, but we ended up hooking up with them on a first date after a few weeks of very flirtatious chatting. They ended up being a little too different from us. After a couple of other dates with different couples, we realized that we were looking for friends with benefits. I mean, we're not club people, and sex parties never sounded appealing to us, but we still wanted to bang other couples together! The only other couple we've hooked up with since we got into the lifestyle, seem to be what we were looking for. We made a good first impression, and on the second date, we made it to the bedroom with them. It started a little rough, and not in a good way. I had some performance issues the first time with her, but those have since been resolved. We chat with them on a regular basis(several days per week), and we've seen them several times since our first vanilla meeting. My wife and I, are looking forward to continuing to build our relationship with these two. They are good people, and I'm happy to call them friends. Friends that have a good time together on a king size bed, banging each other's spouses! All that said, I don't know how big of a part we will play in this couple's lives, but we're going to ride the wave till the end. Why not, it'll be fun while it lasts!

We are passing on Desire, going to Caliente. We don’t look for trouble. Apropos to SW PA, we were in Israel and Jordan in October, 2017 and there was a terrorist attack in New York City, in which we find ourselves frequently. You never know.

Oldest was home from college watched our youngest* free night those are hard to come by for us LOL so we headed out to the club for our second visit. Hoping Saturday night be a bit more productive we got to the club/bar around 8 only us and another couple ordered couple drinks and waited and sized up other couples as they entered. Around 9ish several ladies came in one sat one seat over from me on my left wife was on the right. out of the blue the lady reached across me with her hand out interducing herself to my wife without even enknowleding me LOL..They talked a few minutes like I wasn’t even there LOL.. I leaned over to the wife and said I think she wants in your panties and I’m not invited lol. We stayed around another hr or so nothing exciting happened decided we head home had some great sex seems we get excited about our club visits!! As we layed in bed catching our breath we laughed about the her first experience being came into by another female..Told her hell I’m lucky your so hot and getting all the attention we may find us that unicorn on day!!

Sucks to be him! If it's uncomfortable for my wife, he'll not get close again.

Mexico is rapidly approaching failed state status. I'd certainly take the State Department warning into consideration if I was planning a vacation.

I could be run over by the number 23B bus that I typically ride on Bower Hill Road. I could get knocked over the head by a mugger while on a vacation trip to New York City. I could eat a bad oyster at a seafood restaurant on Lake Arthur. I could get blown up by a terrorist bomb in Mexico. I could stay at home and die of boredom.

Thank you for the advice chiccouplexx!!!!!! After being topless (the only lady topless, not good) at the Garden of Eden, Julie had a bikini top painted on at Garden of Eden to match her actual bikini bottoms. For street wear, she had a short little school girl skirt over her bikini bottoms with a white button blouse. After the G of E, we checked out Hog's Breath and asked a bar tender. Off came Julies blouse top and skirt. We hung there for an hour and a half or two with Julie in her body painted top, her bikini bottoms and sandals, not a problem at all. We never saw another women with body paint so were really cautious. Rob

My advice would be to cancel the party plans, but then the OP was several days ago so that ship has sailed. Our life gets busy sometimes too, but I've never had a situation where my wife didn't explain why she was not in the mood. I mean if she's super stressed and doesn't feel like doing anything she tells me all about it and why she's stressed and why she just wants to watch TV with me and go to sleep. Then, she will make time for us another day even if she's not 100% in the mood. Anyway... communication is needed here. Actually communication and a pause is needed.

Trace Ekies, you may have hit the nail on the head!! That being said, nude can be sexy and it can be non sexy. It just depends on the circumstances. Nudists understand that. But if you are a constant horn dog who just likes being nekid too, I get that the original poster doesn't get it. Actually I think you do get it because it would be pretty bad if you feel it is sexy to be naked with your young kids wouldn't it!! It's just that for long term nudist who are frequently around lots of people naked, you just get so used to it, it's really is not about sex or sexy, you hardly notice unless the right circumstances arise. Not any different from being clothed.

Normally, the wisdom is don't mess with your friends. But you've already been doing that, and (up till now) there's been no repercussions. You've been taking it slow, the two of you have been communicating well with each other, the other couple is on board. Why not take the next hurdle? Your nervousness is understandable, any time you try something new and a little uncomfortable you're filled with angst.

Congratulations. You've found a great way to begin your LifeStyle journey. Enjoy it. You seem to understand one of the axioms, that things always change. When they do - you may decide to try out other fantasies, or relationship with the couple you've found may change - be open to that as well.

Congratulations! You have clearly described a common pathway in the LS. From the outside looking in (aka vanillas, interesteds, just about to dip the toe, breathless reporters,.. )the LS is all about sex. That's what is talked about, envied, disparaged, ... From the inside looking out, the LS is all about your primary relationship with your spouse or S/O, and how that journey unfolds. For a few in the LS, it really is "all about sex". For many others, it is about building relationships with like-minded couples. The friendship piece really does matter. Trust, intimacy, honesty in a space where no one is embarrassed to be having fun\. Compare that to the issues of ordinary life.

Just slow down. I don't like distracting myself from the moment. Squeezing or pressing doesn't work for me but I've heard that advice as well. I like to focus on what's going on, take it all in. My advice is pay attention to what you're feeling and back off the edge quickly if it feels like you're even getting close to it. Pull out and rub or slap her clit with your cock. Go back down on her for a quick break. Anything to ease that initial intensity even a quick position change. Do it in a sexy way to keep bringing her along. If she has any experience at all she'll know what you're doing, most likely she'll take it as a compliment that she's so hot(maybe you can even tell her that which will pay dividends) and she'll appreciate the effort. It only takes me a minute or two to get over that "oh shit this feels too good" feeling and I'm able to last as long as I want. You mentioned condoms. Extra strong condoms can help because they are thicker but stay away from the ones with the delay stuff in them. You'll put that on thinking it's works right away and go balls deep and finish before you get started. Best case is you'll get off the ledge by your own doing and then won't be able to cum. If you aren't using condoms ask her to taste herself on your cock.(I find many, not all, women like to have a taste but most don't like to suck a cock with a condom on) The time it takes to move to that position and back may be all the time you need to get off the ledge. If she's assertive I like to let her get on top because I rarely cum that way. Another position is jockey(man on top straddled the woman's closed legs). You may imagine this would be too intense but it is more like coital alignment, it limits the ability for long deep thrusts and is more of a grinding position that will stimulate the clit nicely but doesn't overstimulate me. Whatever it is you are doing pay attention to what your body is telling you and back off quickly. It usually only takes a couple of minutes and you can be fucking as long as you want. Also...Practice, practice, practice. The more in tune you are with that feeling the quicker you can learn to deal with it and get past it.

I understand when your play partners are too far away. We have looked at online couples. We haven’t acted on it yet. I am too nervous meeting complete strangers. I am thinking doing it quickly and not going back and forth with emails helped. You also were strong in what you wanted. I am thinking you checked my posts too. The bi thing would have scared you. Let me tell you that it would have scared me too. lol.

Tried it and love the thought of it. It hasn't always gone easily in real life. But I'll keep trying

Tried it with a toy and a penis and enjoyed it. It would greatly depend on the size of the penis. With an adequately sized penis I wouldn't really have any urge to do so, but with a smaller penis (or if the guy isn't getting totally hard - as was the situation when I tried it) it would definitely make things better.

You know through the entire thread I was just waiting to get to the bottom to say are you sure there isn't an untreated psychiatric disorder going on here. Though must question your statement about recovered from her addiction, it is not just an addication if she has been diagnosed as above. The above can be controlled with medication, Borderline however is a whole other issue and a life long issue. I hope your wife is continuing with professional supports. P.S. I also agree Gang bangs are a fetish and not part of the lifestyle. I have also noticed that every time Bigman posts the numbers at his wife's alleged gangbang change. More than two is still tooooooo many for my taste.

That was a pretty long post. Let's see if we can break it down to it's essentials... Your wife met some guy on the internet who proposed that she pull a gang-bang for 30 guys, none of whom you know, at some undisclosed location 100 miles from where you live. You, being a nice guy and all, are totally OK with all this, you just want to know if it "might get out of hand?" Dude, it's ALREADY "out of hand"