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Meeting this couple as a couple. Everyone was on board. I didn’t need much encouragement

Whoever you are using sure drives faster than the ones we get. More like 20-30 minutes for us.

You could choke on a Cheerios at breakfast, sure, but why go into a drug cartel war zone in Mexico? There’s many safer alternatives.

I too want to welcome you to Swingersboard. You have come to the right place to ask your questions. I perceive nothing in your story that indicates to me that your wife is associating the size of your penis with her ability to have an orgasm. And I perceive nothing that indicates your wife is signaling that she wants to experience sex with a different man. Take care that your imagination and your fears do not carry you away. I agree with what cplnuswing wrote: you should talk to your wife about your concerns and ask her about her feelings.

Hello, and welcome to the site. First, I doubt size matters like you think it does. There are many many aspects to pleasuring a woman that have nothing to do with penis size. Second, if you aren't able to honestly communicate about how you each feel about your sex life together, then I assure you swinging is not going to work out well for you. Good communication is the foundation upon which swinging is built, and if you don't have it yet, then that's what you need to focus 100% of your efforts on, improving the communication. Third, swinging and surprise are two words that should never be said together, so no, arranging something without her knowing is not a good idea. One, it goes back to the communication thing, since by their nature surprises don't involve two way communication, and second, doing something like you are suggesting is not showing much respect for your wife. If a couple are already experienced swingers then some sort of special surprise on something they have already proven they like and are into by their past actions, then that's one thing, but to hit someone cold with swinging, that's a good path to divorce. Just talk to her, and keep talking, and the answers will come.

Anytime we caught a whiff of a cheater on SLS, he/they were cut off. Having said that, we weren't nearly so concerned at our club or a house party. I have no doubt some wiggled their way into those, and it's possible we played with them without knowing it.

So, we are new users, and this will be a long post, but we wanted to share our experiences. Most will be written from my, the husband's point of view. I enjoy writing, and see this as a great outlet. There will be several posts to this thread with numerous stories full of detail. As a little introduction, T and I had talked and joked about swinging for years. We never had a serious discussion about it, and didn't really talk about it in bed. I knew that she had an interest in other women, but had never had any experiences. We had experimented taking photos and sending them to a voyeur site for a while, but T was a little self conscious about her body and being recognized. This first post will be a general overview of how I felt at the end of the year, and now, two years out. After a year in the LS, I am happy to say that we are still together, and things are actually better than ever. Whether it is due to the lifestyle or not, who knows. We did not get nearly as crazy as many couples do, so if you want to read a Penthouse Letters type review, that is not what happened, and not what you will find here. As I look back on it, I have mixed thoughts about going in to the lifestyle. That being said, we will experiment and play with other couples again. I am not writing to talk anyone out of experimenting, or to advocate experimenting for that matter. I am just going to lay out what happened so that you can make a more educated decision for yourselves. The Cons of the Lifestyle for me were: - It introduces a level of stress to your life that you probably have not experienced in a long time. "Do they like us?" "Will they show up?" "What is wrong with me?" are all questions that you can plan on asking yourself. - There is no taking back or re-doing what happened. It is done. Final. In the books. Make your decisions and set your boundaries ahead of time. - I discovered a level of insecurity within myself that I never knew I would have. I questioned my attractiveness, my manhood, my wife's level of attraction to me. It led me to seek out a Dr. that would put me on Testosterone therapy, which I have since gone off (Another topic altogether). The Pros of the Lifestyle for me were: - It adds a level of excitement to your sex life, even outside of your lifestyle experiences that cannot be matched. - We built a much deeper level of trust and communication between each other. - Strange to say this, but it is almost a "Hobby" that you have in common. - It is a secret that you keep from your family and friends, which makes it exciting. - We grew to appreciate each other more. Our names will just be initials, and the names of others will be changed as well out of respect for them. I look forward to hearing about other's experiences, and answering any questions that you all may have.