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We have come to look at potential playmates not as 8 out of 10 or 4 out of 10 but as simply "doable". We tend to look for HWP couples but we've at one time or another been attracted to people that surprised us. Which kind of proves that attractiveness, particularly in sexually charged situations can be quite subjective. One time that comes to mind occurred at Trapeze. We had met a couple around the dance floor and talked a bit but Mrs Doc said she wasn't interested in the guy, he did nothing for her. Later, we were in the back on the big bed under the mirrors playing together. Its kinda dark back there and at some point another couple laid down beside us. After a bit of kissing, I reached down to fondle my wife and found another hand there and she seemed to be enjoying herself. A little later, the woman crawled over and began to give me head. I was surprised to see that it was the couple from earlier. Anyway, we spent about an hour with them and had a great time. Mrs Doc had a better time than I but, hell, who's complaining? As we drove back to the hotel I asked her what changed her mind about the guy

I'm a little confused by the question, for example, not sure what having kids has to do with anything. But anyway. To begin with: I don't own my wife, or her body, or her sexuality. If she 'gets fucked by another [person]' then that is because she is fully invested and consenting in that fucking. The only way it reflects negatively on me is if she chooses to do so in a way that is contrary to our relationship's ethical foundation - and then it's not a reflection on me personally, but rather on the relationship itself. We've decided that sex with others is a possibility, with the understanding that: a) We will be honest with each other. b) We will be open with each other. c) We will follow a shared set of safer sex practices. If she were to say to me: "I want to fuck that person", my response is: "Need anything from me?" D

NO. You are a newly divorced male just looking for some easy pussy - not what swinging is about!!!

^^^This... Physical attraction has to be there at some point but I find a woman to become less or more attractive as I get to know her. Sexual confidence, a flirty attitude, a look, a touch, something showing interest in me(yes that's shallow), a compliment that seems sincere will all adjust my attitude about a particular woman's attractiveness. Now, right off the bat, no conversation just walking into the room, I'd say I notice classic beauty, nice cheekbones, pouty lips, bright eyes good skin tone, not too much makeup(yes, guys do notice) rather than someone more exotic like really high cheekbones, big lips, pale skin, freckles, art. Not that I can't find any of those traits attractive, I do. It's just what I'll notice first. In any woman The smile has to be there. I love a bright, easy smile, lots of teeth showing, If eyes are the window to the soul a smile is the window to a confident personality. I can be won over with a beautiful smile. Once I get past all of that I'd say I like clothing that shows off the goods. I can't rank tits or legs, once you've seen one pair you want to see them all.

Funny you should mention it... no but I have thought about asking it myself. I would answer and would tell why (nice eyes ) whatever.

Another sorry single guy who thinks swinging is about HIS dick. Perhaps there's a good reason why you're "just divorced"!

How do you go about soliciting these opportunities?