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I know what you are thinking... what does a person standing on stage scared to death have to do with swinging. Well... this is a different kind of stage fright, I call it this for lack of a better term. This is something that most people think of in swinging as only affecting the men. Here they are ready to play with some new woman, a woman they have wanted for hours, month's or even years, and just when everything is falling into place and it's time to perform they can't. How many times have we seen this, or had it happen to us. I know I've seen it plenty, and the thing is it's not the guys fault, and it's not the girls fault either. I mentioned earlier that this affects more than the men, and it does because women have the same problem, it's just not physically visible. Usually with us it's shows itself in that we aren't able to cum. What causes this? you ask. Simple, not being comfortable in your environment. In a normal dating relationship you don't have sex with a person until you are comfortable with them, this might be the first date, or it might be 3 months later, at any rate, by the time you get around to swinging you are definitely comfortable with your partner. You know what to expect. When it comes to swinging you could be playing with someone you barely know (if at all), that you only met an hour before and haven't really even talked to. How comfortable can you be, completely naked trying to have sex with what is basically a perfect stranger? Ok, so some people can, but most can't. So what is my advice? The same as my advice has often been. Get to know the person you are with ahead of time, my usual rule is 3 dates (but that's just me). At any rate be comfortable with who you are with. If you aren't comfortable, don't do it (or her or him). If all else fails, there's always Viagra... I hear it's helped many men at least stay hard (but it doesn't help them cum). And hey, remember... you aren't alone, it's actually quite common. This should be looked at from another angle as well, a warning so to speak to all the single guys out there who think swinging and group sex would be just SOOO cool. Things are much different in real life than in fantasy.

UPDATE: Well after last night were are now a full swap couple. It was AWESOME! So 2 weeks ago we had plans to visit Trapeze with our playmates. Unfortunetely J had a death in her family and they had to travel out of state. So my buddy and i rescheduled a vanilla date nite of bowling and drinks with a group of friends. Their babysitter fell thru at the last minute. Mrs 2b and i decided to hang out at the bowling alley for a little while, have a drink, and wait for our playmates kids to go to sleep. So we head over around 11.My buddy and I go to the garage to have some rum and a smoke while our wives were in the living room drinking wine and watching a movie. After a few shots we were all back in the living room finishing the movie. It's about 1am at this point and i know my wife really gets sleepy this time of night without stimulation so I'm thinking nothings going to happen at this point. Boy was i wrong. All of a sudden D goes over to his wife, pulls down her pants, and starts eating her out. This gets my wife's attention and she starts giving me head on the other sofa. After a few J brings my buddy oct and tells him to sit beside me. We are both laying back getting blowjobs for a couple minutes then J leans over to me, and starts sucking me. My wife switches places and starts giving D a bj. This was my first time making eye contact with my wife with another dick in her mouth. It was tough not to cum right then asty that site. Also J is very talented so that watt making it any easier. They gave us nough double blow jobs and then the girls started eating each other out while we watched. After they got each other off J came to me and my wife went to him. My wife and i are both giving oral. So while I'm eating J pussy, my wife turns around to join me between Js thighs. D sees this as his opportunity as my wife's magnificent ass i200ys pointed in the air, to go for. Next thing i know i see my wife getting entered from behind. J looks at her husband, pulls me up to her missionary, and i stuck my dick in as far as i could! So we stayed at it for about 15 minutes with each other's wives and went back to finish with our own spouses. Somewhere in there Mrs2b got her MFM as well. Overall it was the most thrilling sexual experience I've ever had. All of us for that matter after chatting today with them. It felt surprisingly comfortable, effortless even. All the trepidation i had leading up to the event went away immediately. Like jumping right into cold water instead off wading. I guess that worked for me. My wife is my superstar. I feel so hot for this woman words can't describe it accurately. She mentioned this morning that this lifestyle was a longtime fantasy of hers. Well it did blow my mind, hers as well and we feeling right at home here. So we'll be sticking around. Thanx for any advice given

I wrote up the below for a New Member brochure for our local club. Thou Shalt Not Touch Without Permission. Don't assume that because someone is ok with others touching them that it's ok for you to touch them. No Means No (Always). If someone says no, it does not mean try again. If you say no to someone and they persist, report it to a staff member. Communicate Communicate Communicate! This is most important between you and your spouse, but also between you and those you may swing with. Be Honest. If you aren't comfortable, say so. Be honest with your partner about how you feel, and be honest with others. If you aren't interested, say so. Don't lead people on. Move at your own pace, not the pace of others. Don't allow others (including your spouse) to push you to move faster than you are comfortable. Be Discreet. No one needs to know who else you've been with. What goes on in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. Never Assume. Just because you played with someone in the past doesn't mean you are playing with them again tonight. Your relationship is the priority. Don't do anything to jeopardize it. Know Your Boundaries, and stick to them. Set rules together and abide by them. Have Fun! If you aren't having fun it's time to take a break. What would your 10 Commandments be?

So, you want to swing. You’ve had all the discussions and you think now you’re ready. But wait, how do we get started actually finding people to have sex with us? You could always ask a close friend that you are comfortable with but this is not recommended by most. Some have had good luck with it and others have lost friends by even mentioning the fact that they are interested in exploring an alternative lifestyle. The two most popular ways are placing a personal ad on one of the many different adult ad sites on the internet and attending a swinger’s club or event. Both have their advantages and disadvantages. Geographic location also plays a part in which of these will work best for you. The club route: If you live in an area where there are clubs available this is a very good option to start meeting people with. Clubs come in many different forms...Off-premise, On-premise, Socials and Meet & Greets...you also have house parties in the mix but they are not something I would recommend for a newbie. Off-premise clubs are basically like any other night club you would attend, with the only difference being that everyone there is a swinger or is interested in becoming a swinger. They are great places for new people to check out the scene, interact with others and ask questions in a no pressure atmosphere. There is a sexually charged atmosphere, lots of dancing and talking and getting to know people. No sex occurs at an off-premise club, if you meet someone for playtime you have to leave the club and obtain a room or head out to someone’s house before play can occur. On-premise clubs are the same as off-premise with the exception that sex can and does happen on-premise. Usually in rooms that are provided specifically for playing, which range from private rooms to group rooms. Socials are basically like off-premise clubs, but are usually held at a hotel that has a large meeting room or ballroom, and are usually held only once a month. You will find dancing, socializing and lots of flirting going on. Sex does not occur at a Social but the advantage over an off-premise club is that you are only a walk away from a hotel room if you happen to meet someone for playtime. Meet and Greets are basically just a group of swingers who get together only for the purpose of meeting face to face for dinner and conversation. Hook-ups can and do occur but it’s not the main focus of a M&G. All of these have the advantage of getting to see the people you are meeting right away, there’s no waiting for pictures to be sent and no time between e-mails and/or phone calls trying to arrange a time that is convenient for all to meet. Play can and at times will occur the same night you meet someone, if everyone is in agreement. The disadvantages are that you can be overwhelmed at times with numerous people vying for your attention as well as having those you would rather not play with asking to play and then dealing with having to turn them down gracefully. The ad route: Ads are a way of meeting people when you don’t live in a place where there is a club close enough to visit and/or you’re just not a club type of person. By placing an ad you are able to spell out everything that you are interested in exploring. What type of people you enjoy spending time with, if you’re just looking for a one time hook-up or if you’re looking for long term play partners. When placing an ad you’re able to tell what type of experiences you have had, what type of experiences you want to have, what you like to do sexually and with whom you would like to do it with. You are also able to search ads and find people you are interested in and contacting them. One of the things that you will have to deal with when placing an ad is answering the responses you get. Some will be from people you might have no interest in. You will have to write back and let them know. Another possibility is that you might wind up playing tag with those that you are interested in trying to find the time to meet. Also, you will have to deal with those who are not really serious about swinging and those that will stand you up once a date has been made. No matter how you decide to meet people for sexual play, be it via the ad route or attending a club, you will only get out of it what you are willing to put into it. You must be able to put effort into your search. If you’re at a club get up and talk to people, don’t wait for them to come to you. If you have an ad out and you’re not getting the response you want, look it over and see what you can do to make it more appealing to others as well as looking for those you’re interested in and making the first move with contacting them. Always remember, there is no right or wrong way to go about it. Find the way you’re comfortable with and have fun in your adventure.

...and dispite popular beliefs, prostitution (or escorts) are not legal in Clark county (where LV is located).

I know this a forum not a “hook up” site. We looked at the hook up sites and decided we didn’t want to sign up. This forum tells you more about a couple than an ad on a swinger site. We found you can tell more about a poster by her posts than by a well thought out ad. The way people describe themselves or by their answers tell more about the true person. For us a man who boasts about his penis or how he “plows” is a turnoff. It may turn others on and we aren’t making judgement on those posts. Some women like to do things I would rather not do. So far the way we met a couple worked for us. Yes it took time and work to find a couple we built up the nerve to write to. We didn’t know if it would work.

This sounds like a rerun of a post that got almost universally panned on another forum website. No one believed anyone would pay thousands of dollars for their wife to go halfway round the world and have quick fling with some character in one of places with the highest rates of AIDS and other STDs in the world. Not to mention personal safety. In the other version she already had sex with him and made a big deal about him being Black. I have to agree it would be incredibly stupid. It is just not believable. There are tons of eligible men close to home, no one is that dumb. Think about how ridiculous the whole premise is!! The next town maybe - couple of gallons of gas at most - but friggin' Africa!!! It sure smells like pure fantasy - which is fine as long as the author admits it. Hopefully the people this forum are not that gullible. I hate to flame, but really!!!??? And I apologize to the regular readers, but this one is way beyond asking for it.