Leaderboard

I have written about my experiences before. Our first time swinging we were in different rooms. We met a couple on a cruise and we swapped spouses. I went to their cabin, my husband stayed in our cabin with the wife. That night was fabulous. It was the first time with someone other than my husband since we got married. I can say we made love. I know have taken exception to that comment. We did make love with kissing, touching and sex. It's not that I did anything new or much different than I do with my husband, it was different because he was different. Looking back, and memories do change, I was totally comfortable kissing and having sex with this new friend. I didn't think about my husband or what he might be doing in our cabin. It was much different when we had sex with them in the same room. My new partner changed. In front of my husband and his wife we had sex. It felt detached and more like putting on a show. The romantic oral from the night before was replaced with him having sex with my mouth. When he entered me the long sensual strokes were gone. I also saw my husband watching us as he was getting a blow job. It just wasn't the same. Even though we have been in same room situations since and I have become more comfortable with it, I still prefer different rooms.

If you bring it up at this point he will realize that there is some truth to the rumor (since you were still thinking about it). IF he brings it up again, we usually play it off as a joke: Sure we do, can't you just see us at a swingers party trading partners...whips and chains, maybe, but swinging...?!! Most likely he isn't going to bring it up again unless you are both drinking again. Easiest solution: avoid drinking all night with him again.

My wife and I are looking forward to playing with another couple. We have talked about what we both want and how we hope it goes down. We want to be in the same room for safety and getting to see each other enjoying others. What I don't get is why anyone would want to go in to separate rooms? Since we have never had the opportunity to enjoy the lifestyle I am sure there is something I am missing. Please let us know the advantage of separate rooms.

Spent Easter at my parents' place. I love my family, and always enjoy getting back to see everyone. Especially during the holidays, when everyone is together. I came back on Saturday to visit and help get things prepped for Easter dinner the next day. I cracked open the big ass bottle of wine I brought with me and settled in to relax. My sister and her husband and their kids are staying with my parents temporarily while they're renovating their house. The whole clan rolled in from my nephew's hockey game, causing the house to erupt in busy, happy noise. My sister got the kids fed and ready for bed, put the baby down to sleep, and knocked off for the night. My brother-in-law, however, was not ready for bed. J - my brother-in-law - is an extrovert of the highest order. A dyed in the wool party animal. He came home with a head start on the holiday festivities. When my sister announced that she was ready for bed, he said he wasn't. "I'm ready to rip." he says. Translation: he's feeling energetic and festive. And wants to drink. J is a bad influence on me. To make a long story short, he and I stayed up drinking, talking, and arm-wrestling until 6:00 AM. My sister was pissed, and because she's as vanilla as the day is long, she was even a little suspicious of our shenanigans. Now let me say this straight up: I love my BIL dearly. He's family. He's the brother I never had. That's it. I had an awesome time drinking myself into a stupor with him, talking the whole night through, really getting to know him. The man is so in love with my sister, and I love him for that. But to the problem. During our long night of discussing everything under the sun, we had a really awkward conversation. "Sho, I heard shumthn about you guys." Yeah, that's him slurring his words. "Oh yeah? Wh'sat?" I asked. "I-I hear you 'n (Mr. intuition) were, uh...kinda freaky." I scrunched my eyebrows up a bit. "Yeah yeah, I heard you guys are...'sperimental." he says, leering at me a bit. "I don't know what you're talking about." I said, looking purposely guilty, trying to play it off as a joke. "I knew it!" he said, "Yeah you guys are a couple of freaks, aren't ya?" he teased. "I heard about you two." Heard about us?? "Um, where did you hear that?" "Oh, it doesn't matter." "Uh, yeah, it kinda does." I said. So he told me. We're from a small community where everyone knows everyone, so yes, I know who he was talking about. But we had ZERO interaction with this person in a lifestyle capacity. Mr. intuition figured it was because he had recognized our photos from one of our profiles. "J, we are not talking about this." I said suddenly. "Think of something else to talk about, because this conversation is done." He's a gentleman, so he dropped it and we went on to talk about something else. The next day (or more precisely, three hours later), I got out of bed, took a shower and tried to make myself appear human. The hangover didn't hit me until about mid-afternoon, but I wasn't going to suffer the shame of wallowing in self-pity. Take some advil, suck it up, and accept that you're going to feel like shit for the next two days. It's your own damn fault. J had no sense of pride that way and stayed in bed until dinner time. He was not a pretty sight. Like I said, J is a bad influence! If I go back there again for another visit, he can have all that gut-rot homemade wine we got into that night to himself. I suffered for three days trying to get that paint thinner out of my system. My poor liver! He didn't say much to me the next day. We didn't get a chance to sort of clear the air about our awkward discussion. I'm trying to decide if I should try to clarify things a bit? I do NOT need my family to know about our lifestyle. J has a bit of a big mouth, especially if he's drinking, and I'm a little concerned about him accidentally blabbing about it. Plus, my sister is decidedly NOT okay with swinging. I'm just wondering how - or if - I should approach him. I'm thinking something along the lines of, "Uh, I'm not sure exactly what kind of impression I left you with after our super-fucking-awkward conversation on Easter weekend, but I just wanted to make you sure we were clear..." Any thoughts or suggestions?

I would have said almost exactly the same. I will add that Web sites like these also have information about private parties. But private parties are typically a little overwhelming for people new to the lifestyle. Taking small steps is wise.

Update. My girlfriend talked to me last night. She said she doesn't want to swing in any way. The fantasy of it is great, but she said she wouldn't feel right actually doing it. I told her everything is fine. If she doesn't want to I support her feelings. The one thing I have learned here is communication is key to everything. Our relationship has grown a lot in such a short time. Our relationship comes first. Every relationship no matter if it's normal or in the lifestyle needs strong communication and trust. As for writing my book on the lifestyle, that is now on hold. I was going to use interviews to gather information but no one has responded. I even posted in here. Anyway, I want to thank everyone for your advice. It has helped my current relationship so much. Maybe soon we will be married. Due to our communication we have never been closer.

How about: I really don't want to talk about this right now with you. Or turn it around and start asking her very personal questions about her sex life so she can also experience how awkward this feels from your point of view.

To actually FIND other swingers, at the top of the page is a tab labelled Find Swingers. However, you should start by talking with each other, making sure your relationship is rock solid, that the lines of communication are wide open, establish what you are looking for and your boundaries and rules, and maybe then start looking for others to join you. Good luck.

Don't forget that we were all "Vanilla" at one time, then someone introduced us to the idea. you yourself said the friends involved were the ones that introduced you to the Lifestyle. If you truly think she suspects and she was trying to get an invite.........well that sounds like someone's curiosity is peaked!(or titillated)

Drink good vodka. You're lucky a 2 dayer was the only price you paid.

I really don't have any friends, now that I think about it. Many, many acquaintances, and I'm an open book with just about everyone...to an extent. I am as open with others as they are comfortable with. But I am very picky about whom I actually call 'friend'. I think I have y'all beat. While I don't have any friends who might find me out, and I don't really care if any of my coworkers discover my secret, I do, however, have family. Had an awkward moment recently...I think it deserves its own thread, though. Lioness, you've got a couple of options: you can be matter of fact about it and tell the truth - because there's no shame in it if you don't feel any - or you can take advantage of the outlandishness of the idea and lie. No shame there either. EDIT: just saw your last post. It sounds like she's inquisitive, and the fact that you said you don't want to talk about it is as good as admitting that there's something to talk about. All I can suggest here is to keep your feelers out to make sure your friendship isn't suffering because of it. There's no need for it to; if hard feelings begin to develop, or persistent awkwardness, simply address it. Let your friend know that you've noticed your friendship becoming strained, and she means a great deal to you. Can you clear the air with her, please? If she presses you, just let her know why you don't want to discuss it. She may be hurt that you don't trust her with your secret. Just focus on your friendship and things will be okay.

I do understand the whole "benefit of the doubt" thing. I also very well understand looking for the source of the problem within ourselves first. These are both laudable and civilized. They are also sometimes NOT the best response, Be Careful.

Me, and my girlfriend have had a crazy love/hate relationship. We would argue a lot but would always end up having hot make-up sex. I was the freakier one of the two but there were times when out of the blue, she would surprise me and do something daring. She is a pretty 5’5”, caramel colored Latina, big round ass, and huge 42 DD’s. She had large dark areolas and big nipples that I loved to nibble on! She has always turned me on. She was always in the middle of my sexual fantasies. We would fuck all day and night! Whenever we would go to a bar, we would get hit on by sexy couples and single guys. It turned me on watching the guys try to hit on her whenever I walked away to get us drinks or use the bathroom. Men, including my guy friends, were attracted to her dark brown fuck me eyes, thick curves, long dark brown wavy hair, and pretty face. We had couples sit next to us and strike up conversations with us all the time. After a couple of drinks, their true intentions would come out as they try to get us to go home with them. I was not the jealous type and I didn't mind her dancing or flirting with other men as long as the guys were respectful and didn't cross the line. She knew that I had experienced threesomes and group sex in my past. She on the other hand, never had done anything like that before. She was a bit of a tease. After being together for a while, we began to talk about ways of making our sex life a little more exciting. I brought up my fantasy of meeting another sexy couple and swapping partners but she didn’t want to see me with another woman. She said that she could not see me fucking another woman. So meeting another couple was out of the question. After some prodding, she admitted that she would be down to have a threesome with another guy. So I took a shot and asked her if my friend Mario was somebody that she could see joining us for a threesome. I had noticed that she would flirt with him a lot. She would flirt with him right in front of me at times, which turned me on and intrigued me! She was attracted to his looks and personality but didn’t admit that to me at first. He would drive down and stay with us for a weekend every month to get away, so she felt very comfortable with him. At first, she would just smile and reply back with something quick like, "in your dreams"! Finally, one night while watching a hot fuck flick, I know she was hot and wet so I brought up the idea of having a threesome with another good looking guy like the guy in the flick we were watching. She smiled and without taking her eyes off of the TV screen, said quietly said, "yeah, maybe." On another night, I told her that I would tell her a secret but couldn't say anything to anybody, especially to our friend Mario. After assuring me that she would not say anything, I told her that Mario had a crush on her and also had confessed to me that he had a sexual dream about him and her. She laughed and looked at me in disbelief and said, yeah right babe! After some more prodding, she admitted that Mario was the one friend who she could see having a threesome with one day. I was so turned on by her admission that I fucked her right there and then! While I fucked her, I whispered in her ear if she would like to feel Mario's cock in her also. She moaned with her her yes closed and nodded her head yes. That's all I needed! I called my friend later on that night and told him what me and Suzy talked about. He was obviously excited and said that he was down if we were down. I saw him soon afterwards and I laid out my plan on how we could get her to fuck the both of us. He smiled and admitted to me that he was always sexually attracted to her and said that he couldn't wait to join us in a threesome. He even admitted dreaming about her again giving him a blow job when he was laid out on our couch one night! Later on, I told Suzy that I had talked to Mario and she laughed when I told her what Mario had dreamed about. She said with a sexy smirk on her face, "Yeah, he wishes I would blow him!" A couple of weeks had passed when me and Mario dropped by her house with her favorite wine in hand. We were ready to seduce her that day! When we got there, she said for us to kick back because she wanted to jump in the shower. She gave me a kiss and went in, saying that she would be out soon! Me and Mario looked at one another smiling and were barely able to contain ourselves. I popped in a porn flick to get the party started! When she came out of the shower, she was wrapped in a big white towel and walked in to her bedroom where we were sitting watching the porn video. She looked at the screen and said with a smart ass look, “Oh, I see that somebody has been watching porn while I was showering.” Before we could respond, she said “Okay you two, you both need to go sit in the living room while I get dressed.” We both stood up laughing and went to the living room. After a while she called us back to the bedroom where we found her drying her long wavy dark brown hair. She had put on some tight little shorts that showed off her long legs and plump ass. I noticed that she had put on a t-top with no bra underneath. Her nipples were hard and poking through. You could see her huge dark areolas and nipples through the white t-top! I looked at Mario and smiled when I saw him with his eyes on her boobs! She continued drying her hair and didn’t seem to care if we saw her bra-less and acted like nothing was happening. The porn was still playing on the screen , which I took as a sign that she didn’t mind it being on at all. She ignored it but I caught her peeking at it a couple of times. We talked and drank for a while when she suddenly asked with a sarcastic tone and smile on her face, “do you guys wanna’ get beat in some dominoes, or are you scared?” I said "Let's do it!" Mario chimed in by saying, “I'm in!” We laughed and sat around a table and pulled out the dominoes. We began drinking, listening to music and playing dominoes. The three of us were having a good time but dealing with the sexual tension was tough for us! I began to notice that she was getting buzzed because she began to tease us and talk shit whenever she would win a round! I suggested that we start playing "Truth or Dare" with the dominoes. The rule was whoever won a round could ask anybody a question or dare them to do whatever the winner told them to do. She agreed to play and even boasted that she was not gonna’ lose! HA! From the very start, she was doomed to lose! Me and Mario kept winning games and our questions to her were becoming more and more personal! At one point he asked her what her last sexual dream was about. I got an instant hard on when she sheepishly answered with a smile that she had a dream that she had sex with a hot looking guy while I watched! I looked at Mario and I could tell he also had a raging hard on! I asked her if she ever thought about the sexual fantasy that we had talked about. Mario played dumb and asked, “Whoa, what sexual fantasy?” She took her time and was a little embarrassed when she admitted she did think about it! I went on to explain to Mario what me and Suzy had talked about. Me and Mario had smiles from ear to ear! At one point, she asked Mario if he could have sex with any of her friends, which one would he pick? He could have chosen any of her sexy ass friends but instead he smartly answered, “I wouldn't want any of them, I would want to be with you Suzy! She blushed and smiled and didn't say a word. I acted like I was surprised at what Mario had said and asked him laughing, "you would pick my lady dude?" He replied, "no disrespect but I have to keep it real with you guys." I replied by telling him that it was cool. I understood. I didn't blame him for picking Suzy cause' she is heck of sexy! She smiled and said, "Awww, thanks babe and gave me a kiss on the lips." Mario laughed and followed by saying, "Hey, what about me? I don't get a kiss? I was the one that picked Suzy over all of those other chicks!" She smiled and said, "thank you Mario and blew a kiss at him." I was so excited at what I was hearing that my cock was throbbing! I won the next round and when she picked "Dare", I dared her to flash us her boobs for 10 seconds! She paused, and sighed before she slowly pulled up her t-top, letting her then 42DD's flop out! Mario said, "OMG, they are so big!" She covered herself up and exclaimed with a laugh, "You guys must be cheating!" He won another round and asked my GF, "are you down with us having a threesome" It got quiet real suddenly as we waited for her response. “Shit, maybe if you two are good boys", she laughed out! I knew we were wearing her down and she was buzzing hard so I decided to go all out! I said loudly, "Okay, whoever wins this round gets to order somebody to do whatever you tell them to do!" I was ready to explode! I could feel the pre-cum running down my cock! She laughed when we got up to stretch and she could easily see how hard we were! She laughed and teased us by suggesting that we could watch the movie and play with ourselves while she went back to sleep! I said to her, "babe, if I win you will not be able to sleep after what we do to you!“ She laughed and said confidently, "you two will be doing what I tell you to do after I win this game, watch!" It was close but Mario ended up winning the round and ordered Suzy to lay back on the bed, close her eyes and relax! Suzy let out a sigh, acting like she wasn't looking forward to what was coming next. She looked at me and quietly did what he ordered her to do. She positioned herself on her bed and closed her eyes. We both smiled at each other and quickly dropped our pants as we both laid next to my girlfriend on either side and pulled up her shirt. We grabbed and began sucking on her huge dark nipples, her neck, and her mouth while rubbing her thighs and legs, slowly reaching her wet pussy after pulling off her shorts! She was moaning quietly with her eyes closed and opened her legs wide. Her tongue was licking her own lips as she began grinding her hips. We all moved up on the bed and took our positions! I felt her pussy and felt how wet her pussy was. She was on her back while he laid next to her with his tongue in her mouth! She had his balls and hard uncut cock in the palm of her hand as she stroked my cock with her other hand! I went down, lifted her legs up and ate her hot pussy like a man who hadn't eaten in days! I fingered her at the same time making her cum loud! I got up and sat up against the head board while she got on all fours so that her mouth was on my hard swollen cock! He slid his cock in her and began pounding her hard! He grabbed and pulled on her long brown hair as she moaned and cried out for him to fuck her harder! “Fuck me Mario! Fuck my pussy!” She sucked on my cock until I finally could not hold it! She stroked my cock hard as I came all over the place! Mario was fucking her Doggy Style when I said to them that I was going to take a quick shower to cool off. I looked and winked at him before jumping into the shower! I had left them alone fucking doggy style! When I came out dripping wet ten minutes later and saw that they had switched positions. He was on his back, grabbing her bouncing 42DD’s as she rode him with her eyes closed! She looked at me and said that she wanted to go back to doing it doggy style and got off him. He got up, his uncut cock all wet with her sweet juices. She got on all fours again and I returned to where I was sitting against the headboard and stroked my cock until she began to suck on it again! Seeing her sucking my cock must have gotten him hornier and ready to shoot his load cause’ he yelled “Oh shit, I am ready to cum baby!” She sucked on my nuts, and cock while I pushed her head down and ordered Mario to fuck her pussy harder! “I'm going to cum” he yelled out! “OH FUCKKKK!” … “YESSS”, she cried out as she took her mouth off of my cock! “TAKE THAT PUSSY MARIO, TAKE IT!” He grunted like a bear and shook as he shot his load in her and fell on her body. He rolled off wet with sweat and exhausted! She laid flat on her stomach and looked at me breathing hard, “It’s your turn babe, fuck me hard and cum in me!” I got up and rolled her over, got on my knees, lifted her legs over my shoulders and pushed my throbbing cock in her! Her pussy was soaked with her cum and Mario’s cream! It felt so good that I said, “Oh shit, I’m cumming baby!” She moaned hard as I pounded her pussy harder and let out a yell as I shot my load deep in her pussy! All three of us laid there naked and exhausted and fell asleep. That was such a wild morning that we all still talk about that day whenever we see each other.

Don't cha just love human beings, Board Members?

I'm slightly above "average". Never really had any hangups about my size. It is what it is and I can't do anything about my size. Can I?LOL. What I can do is keep trying to improve my skills. We recently had our first full swap at a club. The guy had a bigger cock than me and I heard my wife say several times that he had a big cock when she was blowing him and she just about begged him to put that big cock in her while he was eating her pussy. I thought it was hot. If a big cock turns her on then it turns me on. The guy had skills too and he was aggressive the way she likes so she got fucked good. I liked knowing she was enjoying it and hearing her tell him to give her that big cock and fuck her harder. She came several times for him and even commented on his size afterward when we checked in. It came down to she was hot for him that night and had a great time. That's what it's all about and we do this for the variety right? I fucked the guys wife. She was decent but honestly my wife is a better, more passionate and active fuck. I'd swap with them again just so my wife could have that guys cock if she wanted it. She and I fucked at the end of the night and she made a point to tell me she like feeling my bare cock filling her with my cum best. I know that is the truth. If we met that couple out at the club next time and she wanted to fuck him again I'd be fine with it. Hell, I might go run him down for her. My wife has a nice tight pussy and some really good head skills. My wife is always picking out the hottest looking women in the club and asking me if I'd like to fuck her so she's not insecure about it either. If I found a gal that competed with her skills or looks, yeah, I'd be pursuing her as well but will always go home with my wife.

We used to only do same room play because I enjoy watching my wife and was uncomfortable with the idea of her playing alone. She was perfectly fine with me playing alone, and I did on a couple of occasions. As adamgunn said, it was nice because I could focus on the person I was with without distractions. After a while, as we have gotten more comfortable, I've become ok with my wife playing without me... with the proviso that I want to hear the details of her encounters (basically because I'm a voyeuristic perv ). That's actually worked quite well, because she gets to have her fun without distraction and I still get to share the experience with her. Interestingly, she has no interest in the details of my separate play. That just isn't her kink. In the end, as long as everyone is open and honest, having fun and following whatever your rules are, there aren't right or wrong ways... together or separate, soft swap or full swap or whatever. Do what's fun for you.

Same room is like a party. You hear and see what the other couple(s) is doing, it can be very erotic. If part of the reason you're swinging is that you want to see and hear your partner as they enjoy themselves, this is the way to go. Separate room in more intimate. You get to concentrate on the person you're with, without distractions. If jealousy is an minor issue separate rooms can help the situation. Both are nice.

Hubby curves up just slightly and it is AMAZING! He has made a few women orgasm from intercourse who have never done it before. So, yeah. Slight curve up wins the prize in my book. Straight comes second, I suppose.

I'm going to make a comment here that's based on my religion so this is my little disclaimer: if you don't want to hear anything about my views of God and religion, just don't read this post, okay? I don't want to offend anyone, but religion is a part of life and as such is fair game for discussion. It plays a part in each person's decision whether to swing or not. This is just my opinion. I am actually a Christian, but I can't remember the last time I went to church. I truly don't think that I'm twisting the Bible's words to suit my lifestyle; I'm just interpreting what I see in it realistically. What I see are people getting so hung up on minutiae of the "rules" that they don't stop and think why God made the rules in the first place. He gave me a brain, and I'm not afraid to use it. So if I follow His advice and stop getting bogged down in the fine print and just look at the main objective, the whole point is to keep it simple. You don't need to be a rocket scientist to lead a good and worthy life. You focus on not hurting people, but helping them and recognizing their beauty and potential. You stay honest and do the right thing, regardless of whether or not it's popular. Keep a sense of humour and don't wallow in the negative aspects of life but move forward and keep trying. Lead by example. Use common-sense. Don't take anything for granted, and remember to say thank you. Be a good citizen by being part of the solution rather than part of the problem. Be brave and take risks. Respect yourself and your needs equally with those of others. Don't let things get to you. Remember that this life is only temporary, kinda like boot camp for the soul. And recognize a good thing when you see it. I mean, it's pretty basic stuff! No, I don't believe that God intended sex to be some kind of thorn in our sides, a burden of the flesh. If he didn't mean for us to enjoy it, he would not have made it pleasurable. And I really think that if he meant for us to ONLY enjoy sex with our spouses, he would've taken away the desire for sex with others. It's not a cruel joke. Sex was meant to be enjoyed in moderation, just like food, sleep, leisure time, etc. It needs to be respected, but it sure doesn't need to be vilified and/or put up on a pedestal as something to be worshipped in and of its own right. I mean, come on! It's a bodily function. God wants us to get the most out of the life we were given, and we'd be doing Him a disservice if we threw this gift back in His face, saying that it was dirty or wrong, or abusing it just to indulge our selfishness. But apparently we're sick because we don't just automatically believe what we're told by people who (they tell us) have some kind of inside knowledge of such matters. Excuse me for laughing, but I think it's pretty arrogant to believe that anyone has any kind of advantage over anyone else in matters of spirituality. The disciples weren't university educated men. They were your average working joe's. They had ordinary lives that became extraordinary because people suddenly took an interest in them. Everyone has something extraordinary to offer if we'd only take the time to look. And speaking of people in positions of power dictating values to the masses, do you suppose Dr. Phil has an ordinary text-book marriage or sex life? You don't see him taking the cameras into his house and allowing the general public to pick apart and critique his marriage style, yet he has no qualms about judging the lives of others. Swingers aren't any different from anyone else; we're just made to appear so through the lens of the camera and through the (mis)interpretations of people "in the know" like Phil. You know what they say about absolute power... I think I was born in the wrong decade.

D's curves straight up and is thick...The "G spot" myth...For me it's not a myth. I LOVE the curve, for sucking and fucking, it is PERRRFECT