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Just recently deleted our profile on a website after frustrating try into navigating the social aspect of meeting swingers in our area. We thought we tried to be very open with communicating what we were looking. After meeting several couples and having experiences turned down. We are left trying to figure out if we are going about it all wrong or it is really all strictly a physical attraction that is not compatible. We have been let down nicely what feels like bogus excuses from multiple people leaving it hard to figure out if we are doing something wrong or just not attractive. Both of us are rather low on self confidence and also struggle with our vanilla relationships. Most of our vanillas are what I call half friends. Only friends when it's convenient for them and leave us hanging a lot when we put effort into trying to maintain friend ships. We feel lead along by our vanillas that there is a relationship there but their actions don't say the same. We have had the same experience in trying to meet people in the lifestyle which might make us more sensitive to let downs I assume. I'm beginning to think we just be caring of other people to just have sex.

DD is a squirter, not always but sometimes. Bring on the squirt, if that's how you get off then do it. I veiw a squirt as a bit of validation that I did good. It's just sex, quit over thinking it and have fun.

I’d like to offer an opinion on the subject. First, wish we had a singles night at our club. They don’t offer one. My wife and I love threesomes. Guys are charged a premium price. Almost double a couple. So this limits our choice. We’ve never played with a single guy at a club. The ones that are their, we have witnessed the same. They sit around. They don’t engage. Guess I can’t blame them. It’s tough. Even as the male of a couple, I’ve had some difficulty with other wives. Maybe I do it wrong. But I think this is a problem with guys in the couple too. I struggle with things to say. Even when I do compliment a lady, I’ve had them say something smart ass back. Example. I told a lady her outfit was the sexiest I ever saw. And her response was take a good look cause that’s all you get. Now, I’m sorry, it’s hard to be confident with ladies doing that. I can definitely see a single guy struggling with this. Some ideas on learning this confidence would be helpful. QUOTE=agreatguy;592236]I can see what you are saying to a certain extent but they should know the score if they are at a club on single guy night. Most, if not all, of the couples are there for the same thing. That in itself should give them some them confidence and not intimidate them. Actually, I've been there as a single guy although it's been quite a few years. I looked for cues and if there wasn't anything obvious I mingled. In this particular case we did walk around a bit and spoke to one guy who seemed shell shocked. He actually came and talked to us later but we had already had our fun for the night and were waiting on another couple to finish their evening so we could tell them goodbye. The guy she finally grabbed got many clues from her that he seemed to ignore including multiple glances and flirty smiles. I tracked him down and opened the door for him and he again seemed shell shocked. I don't know why. It's what he's there for. She finally grabbed his arm as he walked by and got him talking then he couldn't take his eyes off of her. My wife has all the freedom she needs but I think she feels like she wants me there with her so I'll be there with her until she doesn't want that. What she really wants is to be pursued a little not always have to do the pursuing. Fortunately the guys she has pursued have all turned out to be decent guys and charming enough once WE broke the ice. I don't think it's too much to expect a single guy to approach us and start a conversation. I understand the fear of being rejected but that's going to happen, you move on to the next couple. My experience in the past and with my wife is that confidence is going to overcome a lot of other shortcomings a guy may have as long as he doesn't come off as arrogant. Any one of four of the five guys there that night could have had a great night if they had just approached us. As far as I could tell the only guy that got laid was the one my wife finally made a move on and he certainly left happy. I guess that was the reason for my post other than it just being a rant. Just wanted to let guys know that confidence and charm will open the doors more than sitting by themselves waiting on the couples to make the first move.

If we can govern with short tweets some may not be able to put too many thoughts together to have a meaningful dialog

Not only that, but the person connected to the boobs is the key. The question is: does she respond to me? If so, the rest is "spice," as you say

If you have a sexy attitude and a friendly disposition, you have nothing to worry about. Chemistry doesn't come about due to bra size. It just happens. We like awesome people. I'm a stranger, but I'm guessing you don't need implants to be happy, so don't get them to make someone else happy.

Hi!

My wife and I had dozens of MFMs over the years. She and I enjoyed it for all of the above reasons. One thing that hasn't (I think) been mentioned is that extramarital sex leads to increased libido which leads to more and better intramarital sex.

We have a couple we go bareback with also though we have not made anything official as far as exclusivity goes. We did agree that if we have encounters with others then we will let the other couple know as far as the bareback issue goes. Don't know if we will play with anyone else but when/if that happens we will cross that bridge when we get there. It is nice not having to use condoms! We just recently got back into swinging after taking some time off to focus on each other so we are moving slowly right now. We've only been with the one couple since we started again.

1)She's my favorite porn star. I love watching her flirt then seduce then get busy. 2)It's an ego boost for me that other guys want her. 3)There is pride in our relationship that I can enjoy her taking pleasure from another man. 4)I get to be a part of it. 5)It's an ego boost for her to be desired and the sex for days and even weeks after is always intense. Sex in most forms is a turn on for me. I like watching and I like participating. Anytime that is happening I'm interested. If I'm involved even better How does she like it? She loves it or she wouldn't do it. I don't own her and I have never talked her into or forced her to do something she didn't want to do. I will agree with Achilles, when she gets going she is such a flirt, so seductive and gets incredibly turned on I think the pheromones she gives off just make guys cum before they even get started good. I've never had an expectation that because she gets to have MFM that at some point I'll get to have FMF. I'd love it but I don't expect it. We also swap so I get to have my fun with other women.

Me and the wife had dabbled a bit and been to a few swingers clubs but mostly kept to each other and observed. Well last sat night had a nice surprise to it. We entered a club and although it was early we noticed that the crowd was a little thin. Not knowing anyone or how things operated we got a few drinks and settled in by the couch area where we mostly talked, kissed a bit and did some light touching. My wife looked hot as hell, decked out in high heels, a mini skit with no panties and a tight top that really showed off her nice breasts. After a few hot rounds of making out and fondling, we decided to check out the rest of the club. The room in the back consisted of several beds and couches, a few guys were getting blow jobs from their ladies and we watched a bit, but weren't quite ready to join in so we went back to the bar area where our night got interesting. We bellied up next to this couple, lets call them Steve and Amy. Amy was very friendly and we said hello, then asked if they frequented the club often. After some small talk I told them we were newbies, but we both had talked about trying our swinging, but that my wife was nervous. Amy took some real mercy on my wife and gave her the low down about the lifestyle and about how everything is ok if you do what you want and how you want in your comfort zone. We took to them right away. Amy went to ask my wife if she was bi-curious. Knowing that she was, she replied yes and Amy went over to her and gave her a hot kiss that instantly got me hard. My wife was shaking from it, but Amy told her to relax and calmed her down rather quickly. We then talked a bit more, and told them we were going to go and hang on the couches again, as I wanted to see how my wife was feeling about what just happened. She seemed okay with it all and we started making out again, she was so wet so I knew that she enjoyed the kiss. After a little longer I asked if she wanted to go play in the back rooms. She agreed and we went and found a couch. After some kissing and fooling around in the back room Amy came around the corner and started watching us go at it. We both caught a glimpse of her in-between kissing and I knew she was going to make a move. My wife looked at me and said we have company. Amy came in front of my wife and smiled at us both then leaned over to give her a kiss. The both of them made out so passionately I though I was going to cum just from watching them. Amy then leaned over and kissed me too. Then she got on her knees and asked my wife's permission to lick her pussy. My wife had no hesitation and she started going down on her. I went to work kissing her and sucking and playing with her tits. My wife was in heaven even prompting Amy to stop and say she is so wet. We both smiled and Amy said she wasn't stopping till my wife came. My wife orgasmed and then Amy stopped and the two of them kissed even more. My cock was now out and throbbing and my wife was stroking me as she kissed Amy. Amy left and went back to the bar area and my wife sucked me till I finished. We went back to the bar after and talked to them more and said our goodbye. We exchanged numbers and they want to meet us again for more intimate dinner and drinks the next time. I'd love to see my wife and Amy go further next time. The only thing is, we don't find her husband Steve attractive, he's a bit overweight and just not our thing. We don't want to judge but I am sure my wife is not looking to get involved with him. I suppose we will just have to tell them how it is and see what they say. I'm hopeful the ladies can play and then us gents can give it our own ladies good for the next time. Swinging is so much fun, can't wait to try it again.

We deleted online profiles after a major disappointment and realizing we were spending way too much time sorting through all the fakes and flakes. We also weren't looking for friends and are pretty much homebodies otherwise. It's not that we don't enjoy meeting people and getting to know them we just don't need to be lifelong friends with people we want to swing with. We found that we can go to our club when the mood strikes, meet and socialize with like minded people and have a good time. We can also have variety and not be tied to specific people. We like the variety a club offers whether it's another couple or a single guy. The not knowing what you're going to get is kind of exciting. Sometimes we don't get anything but each other and possibly an audience and that's fine too. We have fun. Confidence is a major factor in this lifestyle. It's a turn on for us and lack of it is a turn off. If this is something you're lacking in it may be the reason you're not being as successful as you would like. If you happen to try a club make sure you aren't wallflowers, get up and mingle. Get yourselves some sexy new clothes that make you feel attractive or maybe find a club that has a theme night that would encourage you to go in costume or at least in character. Sometimes stepping outside yourself is a way to overcome a lack of confidence and it's not really lying about who you are if everyone knows it's playacting. With success will come more confidence. Good luck!

We are in Long Beach, 63 and 71, and still have fun.