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I think men are more obsessed with their size than women. I have had a fear of what guys think of my size. I posted that my clitoris is large and that I fear I am not tight enough. I also think if you are reading this board you may think that every guy is large. The fact, and you can look it up, is under 6 inches. Only the men on here are average at 7-8 inches NOT. What is true is men come in different shapes and thickness. We also know some guys grow more than others. My big fear has been a guy won’t feel me. Also I don’t like how I look there. Nobody has ever complained. It’s just me. Now let me make you feel better. A recent story from a party I was just at. My friends have been having parties that we started to go to a year ago. We live 4 hours away so we only have been to a few. It’s my college girlfriends and their partners. We were at a party and there was a guy I never saw. He acted as if it was his first time. He was the last to undress and he held a towel to cover up. Don’t ask why I approached him. I usually don’t approach guys, guys usually join after I am with someone. When I did approach I did think damn. Not because he was small but because I was afraid I was too loose for him to enjoy. I didn’t measure but he was smaller than my hand. I know he was nervous. We played. He was actually attentive and seemed like a good guy. I put on condom on him. It was a little loose. I ended up on top. He did slip out a few times and I knew it would be better if I more or less rocked on him. I was able to orgasm and it wasn’t faked. When we were both done and I got off the condom was still in me. He was more worried than I was. We ended up laughing together and he asked if I faked it. I assured him I didn’t. I never mentioned size. I just said it was great.

I see no good purpose in using the two-word combination "no drama" in an on-line profile. * A drama couple typically do not see themselves as a drama couple. Consequently, you are liable to see the words "no drama" in a high-drama couple's profile. * To say in you profile that you want to avoid drama couples, the high-drama couples who do not realized that they are actually drama couple are still going to try to get in touch with you. * It is a generally good strategy to avoid anything in your profile that sounds negative.

We love it when others put this in their profile. It tells us that avoiding them is probably the prudent move.

I agree it often means bisexual. It can also mean BDSM. It'll have nothing to do with everyday, vanilla 'open-minded' concept, that's for sure.

I like the stockings and garter look. As someone else said they frame the ass and pussy. I find the look sexy. That said it's certainly not essential for me. I agree that it's more about what she is comfortable with. A flirty smile and confidence will always trump whatever a gal might or might not be wearing.

I won't wear them, how will he suck my toes?

I am in it for variety, I already have one exclusive relationship with my husband. I don't wish a restricted Lifestyle - I don't mind a relationship - FWB type of relationship, but no exclusivity.

IntrovertSwingr has prompted me to add to this discussion. I don't find stockings, hosiery, boots, etc. to be all that sexy - not that I have any prejudice against them. I would much rather the woman I'm with to be comfortable than trying to dress sexy for me. If stockings make her feel sexy, great, and I've been with women who feel that way. But, to me, stark naked and desiring play is the very sexiest thing for me.

I think it's probably code as well in most cases. If it's someone you otherwise might be interested in the best thing to do is simply ask them what they mean by open minded. You are opening the door for them to explain themselves. It they are bi-sexual or curious I think at that point they will tell you. If it means they are referring to something else they should be able to explain what that is.

All of the above and the fact that it makes me realize that I am still attractive to men and from age 21 to 100 they all want to sleep with me as if it is the most natural thing to do. When I was 30, I had the perception that I will be asexual by 60. Now I realize, that swinging keeps it alive for as long as you want it.

I don't wear pantyhose or thigh highs.... mainly because the thigh highs won't stay up for shit. I prefer to be comfortable. I also don't wear heels. So, I go in my pants and shirt, change pretty immediately into whatever lingerie I am going to be wearing that night with flat sandals. Bare ass white legs and all If people don't find me as I am sexy, they can move on. --signed, the non-girly girl woman

I tend to agree with your wife. It's just about the kiss of death for a man to put bisexual on a swinger site. Too many men/couples see that as saying he's in it for the M/M activities. But, seriously, there are a lot of husbands who aren't really bisexual but don't mind, or even might enjoy, some M/M things during threesomes or foursomes. Now it's considered, not only OK but cool, for the wives to be 'open-minded' but not for the husbands. If you were to contact a lot of couples on SLS that the ad says 'straight' for the husband, I'm betting you'll find that a good percentage will admit that the husband is also open-minded, so to speak, if that's what is desired.

Without having to Google it, I remember the Reverend Arthur Dimmesdale (thank you spell correct) as a candy ass punk. Wouldn't stand up for the woman he was screwing. Even as a girl I knew that he was the antithesis of what I wanted in a man.

He's right (I know, you can't actually tell him that though). As the old saying goes, beauty is only skin deep...but sexy is something that comes from inside and has nothing to do with the skin. You are a VERY sexy woman and that is something that your friend can see and wishes she had. We all see the 'flaws' in ourselves but they are usually only seen by us. Trust what others tell you: your husband, your friends, us...your opinion is distorted due to your proximity. Careful, after saying nice things about everyone on the board, you have to go out and call us 'normal'...some of us might be insulted by this Thank you for sharing with us.

I post on here thoughts I can't post anywhere else. I am sorry if I am too personal. I found this board in a very strange way and I have found so many of you open to helping so many others. I know you aren't all sex addicts. I was afraid to post on here at first thinking who would be on this site. I found out that you are normal, for the most part. Business people, lawyers, doctors and just everyday people looking to help others with their doubts and curiosities. It looks like many of us have had the same experiences. I have shared some really private thoughts, being bisexual being the most scary I thought. I found it easy by being anonymous to share my experiences. My body is something I seem to have always had my doubts about. I know it is silly. I grew up with those who were all shapes. The friends who I thought were very pretty had doubts about their own bodies. I have a friend who to me has a perfect body and she she has always said to me that she wishes she had my body. When i was younger others developed before me. I wear glasses, my butt is flat, my hips wide. I was awkward. I was able to talk about looks with certain friends. I couldn't talk about what I looked like down there. For the most part this board is the first time I could really open up about it and only because it's anonymous. I have joked with my husband about it and he says that I am crazy. I have now in the last year or more seen other friends parts. Of course we are all different, maybe mine is just more different. I think I know how a guy with a small penis may feel. I think it is ridiculous for anyone to hide their body. I know that I have had good sex with someone who was on the small size. I think I had to prove to myself that I wasn't too big for him. He even said that it was great. So much for my Hump Day post

Brief summary: We had a very hot experience on vacation (two nights) and enjoyed it. Since then we've been searching for our next by meeting people on SLS. It's been extraordinarily difficult and we really AREN'T super picky people (I promise!). The following is a log of get-to-know dinners we have had. Aliases withheld to protect the innocent: Couple 1: No attraction. Couple 2: Attraction! But they flaked off after trying to schedule something a couple times. They would make contact again, then flake off again. :/ Finally gave up! Couple 3: No attraction. They were both pretty aggressive at dinner. Just didn't click. Couple 4: Attraction, especially to their personalities. We weren't comfortable with their interests in the bedroom though. Couple 5: Attraction! Had 2nd date planned but then the husband went *super drama* on us. We pulled the plug immediately. Couple 6: This one still has potential. We like them. Our schedules haven't worked out. We will see if we can make something happen next month. Couple 7: Attraction! But then...they wanted to trade videos (basically cybersex) while pushing back our first physical date. Then they pushed back our 2nd. We pulled the plug. Couple 8: This past weekend: we (by accident) were both going to a club the same night we made contact on SLS so we arranged to meet up there. Then we quickly discovered they must have had a pre-planned date with another couple because they rolled up on us and took over the conversation with these people. So we turned out being the third wheel standing there awkwardly while they talked. We drifted off and just danced together, etc. Never said another word to us. Very awkward. With that last couple: I mean...exercise some common courtesy would you? If you already have plans it's super easy to say: "hey we will meet tonight at the club! But we already have arrangements with another couple so we can meet briefly but then we have to carry on with our original plans! Hope you understand!" Well hell yeah we would understand, but have the damn courtesy to just let us know instead of blowing us off mid-meeting. We didn't expect to play that night with you since it was our first meeting...but we also didn't expect to be cast aside for clearly a previously planned date. So our SLS dinner graveyard heap grows. A couple of them were just lack of attraction which is fine. The flaking, drama, and inconsiderate type stuff is ridiculous though. I will say that even though nothing has worked out in the 6 MONTHS we've been trying -- at least we have had some hot together-sex in the bedroom thinking about a few of these couples. Thanks for listening to my rant! :p This swinging thing is difficult.

We were one year before we met people with whom we clicked. But here's the thing. After you find an experienced and worthwhile couple, they will introduce you to other people who will introduce you to other people . . . You'll then be off to the races.

Unicorns do exist, but they are VERY RARE and hard to find (as you have found out). Even after finding one, there's no promise of a match. That's why most couples look for other couples since there are just more of them out there to find. Even still, finding a match is going to be difficult...but while it will take some time and effort, it can be worth all the work when you do find that match. You really only have two options: keep looking and hoping to find your match or just give up, but once you found a match it really is worth the effort. Good luck.

Think we know there is no such thing as a unicorn except in porn. Reading half the things posted on this board read like a porn story. I would think there are other women who are curious like my wife. Maybe even a couple who only want the wives to play. We aren’t looking for couples on this board. I am posting for thoughts and suggestions.