Leaderboard

Hello, Petra here. Why are all of the responses to this thread discussing what makes it good for the guy? For me, as a woman giving a blowjob (to completion), what makes unforgettable for me is: - He's already been in a pussy, mine or preferably another woman's, but hasn't yet come (see below); - He's totally flaccid (I like getting it all in my mouth to start and feeling him expand); - He is not too long. A good blow job-size dick for me is short, but thickness doesn't matter - the opposite of what I like for anal where thinness is preferable and length doesn't matter. - He lets me have control. I don't like it when a guy is thrusting his dick into my throat. I can deep throat some, but it doesn't make it good for me. I want to do it my way with a lot of tongue and take it farther down when I'm ready. Be patient and I can take it all the way. - He lets me know when he's going to cum, because: - I take all of his semen in my mouth; - I hold it in my open mouth (to me the taste is anywhere from neutral to good), roll it around with my tongue for him and anyone else who's interested to see what I've done (naughty girl); - I make a show of swallowing. - Optional - Instead of swallowing, I like to snowball (pass the semen back and forth between our mouths before swallowing) by either kissing him or another woman. (I like to do it with another guy, but guys don't. Hubby's done it for me twice though.) - Also option - Having someone fucking me or licking me while doing the above. I prefer giving blow jobs while upright (kneeling, standing, sitting) for control so I prefer doing cowgirl, reverse cowgirl or sitting on his/her face if it's going to be me doing these simultaneously. Doggy can work as well.

I'm curious if folks with more experience or knowledge of Polyamory have a opinion. Too elaborate; does anyone feel poly relationships/family groups will become more common, and openly known in the next 2-3 decades. I've had knowledge of two such relationships in the past couple decades, and read about others. Is it going to remain a thing involving a relatively small stable portion of the North American or European population. Or is it growing as a practice, with increasing numbers in informal & formal poly relationships?

I was just with a new woman for the first time in many years. I know or think I know she had to be with bigger men, she told us she just came back from Desires. Porn has made many of us to think we aren’t big enough even though we are the norm.

To answer the question about definition; What I'm looking at are relationships that extend beyond sex but include it. & at the core have formal understandings between the participants. That may or may not include written contracts concerning property or other financial agreements but that the adults involved have a clear and formal agreement on these things. The other discussion that triggered my question here implied children and parenting was included, tho its not necessary as I see it to restrict this to ongoing child rearing relationships. As for 'swinging' outside a poly relationship. Extramaritinal sex does not automatically dissolve monogamous marriages or relationships, so it won't exclude a poly relationship in my view here.

From our experience, you do not have to worry about either of your questions. People in the lifestyle are normally very easy to get along with, non-demanding, and respectful of other's concerns. While finding a single female is rare, most of the women we know in the lifestyle are bi. And, most guys are fine with their female partner playing with the female of the other couple. The guys know that if their partner is happy, they will make sure that their guy is taken care of by another women or themselves. We have found that most guys are turned on by their female partners having sex with another guy. And, it is OK if you do not jump the guy of the couple. However, it makes the situation easier if you are nice to the guy, perhaps give him a hand job, and talk about how hot is is to see your guy with his wife and how much you appreciate it. For example, we do not go along with any humiliation either way, and that has never been a problem.

We could not agree more Gold, a vagina IS a really marvelous thing!!!!

I have seen more than once single guys with identifiable face pictures of other women not mentioned in their ad. This is a huge lack of discretion and I wonder do these woman know their face is on a swinger site.

At some point most women have had a baby and that is WAY bigger than the largest penis...and yet the vagina (which is really a marvelous thing), is able to recover and enjoy something as 'small' as a penis again. Also, there are things that you can do that doen't even require a penis for the woman to enjoy. Don't worry about this, it isn't going to be an issue.

Which "such relationships" The poly or the closed swinger circle? We get into difficulty when we try to define too closely. My wife and I are VERY married. We also play with others. By many definitions of marriage we are being unfaithful. By our lights that could not be farther from the truth. When I talk swinger or poly I always start out with "What do you mean by that term?" The range on Poly runs regularly from, if it feels good do it bar pickup to committed long term solid family structures that just to have several adults and maybe some children. In between there are varying degrees of looser sexual and emotional alliances. All of them see themselves as POLY. FWB?, Swinger?, The same sort of variation applies. For me, Poly would be closed group, mutual emotional ties all around, commitment for the long haul. This view is strongly influenced by my vision and experience with marriage. As we are relationship types my wife and I both tend to develop some degree of emotional attachment to our longer term playmates . The odd thing is that often times I end up concerned for the welfare of the guys and she the women, although we do not play that way. So, are we then Poly? Or are we just normal decent human beings?

Private message sent

It is the veterans that opened my mind to allow me to enjoy my life. I know I haven’t taken all the advice but at least you all are a sounding board for me.

There are two toxic emotions in swinging, and it's worth naming them and explaining them. The first is ENVY. Someone else will always have better teeth, a bigger cock, a tighter pussy, perkier breasts, nicer skin, ... Envy is an expression of the fear of inadequacy. The antidote is contentment. Embracing who you are, what you are, and what you bring to lifestyle is essential. The second is JEALOUSY. Jealousy is an expression of fear of loss or even abandonment, the idea that your partner might like someone else enough to cast you aside because their new partner is somehow "better". Swinging is about having fun, not "trading up". The antidote here is compersion--finding joy in seeing your partner pleasured by someone else. Being able to name and to discuss these common toxic feelings is an essential first step to having fun in the lifestyle. Here is the point. Just about everyone coming into the lifestyle confronts these emotions--either before, during, or just after the first encounter. It is normal for one or both in a couple to have these concerns. Reassuring each other that it is just adult play and not a contest goes a long way towards dealing with these feelings. Good luck and have fun!

Don't get discouraged. Our first date was simply a meet and greet, dinner, drinks. We danced a little and my wife invited the other guy to step outside. I was impressed with her confidence. They stayed outside for a while and came back in. She told me she kissed him and he felt her up a little. She encouraged me to do the same which I did. As the evening wore on it became apparent that the couple was not representing themselves as they had in emails. We told them as newbies we were soft swap, same room only. They said that was fine but as the evening went on they started telling us how they preferred same room and the wife even wanted to be able to text me. We said our goodbyes around midnight and on the drive home my wife had a breakdown. Come to find out she was muscling through the evening but really had gotten turned off about an hour before. It took us a while, several months actually to work through that. We realized we aren't looking for friends just good one off experiences and prefer some mystery and anonymity so we've had better luck at clubs. I say all that to say this. Take a little time to work through it. These are the situations where swingers learn how important communication is. It's especially important for you to be able to acknowledge that there is nothing wrong with her shutting down for her own reasons, whatever they may, be and be completely supportive of that(it sounds like you were so you're already a step ahead of the curve). She needs some time to digest this first experience and figure out what she wants and for you both to figure out what you want together out of the lifestyle. Once you've done that you can move on to your next experience better for the knowledge and experience you have.

Our favorite house party is one that allows a fair number of single guys. Since the ladies can generally play more than us guys can, it doesn't seem all that "unbalanced", though the women are definitely busy! It helps that this is a crowd who mostly know each other well, so we're kinda mostly past the annoying stalker guy problems. The host, himself a single guy, tends to select attendees who are cool, friendly, and respectful people. I admit that things can sometimes be a little bit "competitive" for guys, but I am usually able to have plenty of fun.

I'm gonna go with "yes".

We both love watching cumshot compilations. At first she had been avoiding of thinking me to cum on her. She was only for blowjob and inside. But during the time we kept watching movies, and she did me blowjob almost 3 4 times per week (sometimes less, sometimes more), she got used to the feeling to cum on her. I must add that the movies do an high affect on that decision. Now we act totally free and enjoyable. Sometimes she allows me to cum on her face, breasts, even her body when she lies on the floor, if she's in the mood. Except that her favourite is blowjob. All the way she tends to feel my cum.