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Hey Everyone! Small update We’ve been chatting with a few couples and met one for drinks last night. We agreed prior that we would not go home with them. Butbdinner was great! A lot of my anxiety has subsided (at least for now) I really enjoyed myself and SO enjoyed the dinner and me. We are planning on going on another date with this couple and see where things lead us....also have plans to visit the club! Thanks again!

Well, talking about it is the cure. He should know your side of it. Perhaps a hiatus would help. Take a break. Find another hobby with him. Reestablish your relationship with him. If after six months or more you're both still interested, reengage with new rules.

TPA was our go to place nearly every weekend for the 1st 5 years we were involved in this hobby. We still go back nearly every year for the NYE party. Its in a rural area and very private. The parking lot is safe and patrolled by security. The club itself is scrupulously clean and well maintained. Its BYOB and they do serve some hot and cold bar food like apps. There is a bar, a nice sound system, a dj who plays to the demographic, a large dance floor with a pole and a cage. There are probably 20 play rooms, some with one bed, a couple with more than one, several theme rooms and a glory hole room. The clientele is friendly, by and large attractive and not cliquish provided that you are friendly and approachable. The couples average in age from 30-55 and are from all walks of life. They allow single males but only at a 10:1 couples to male ratio. You can't just decide to show up on Saturday night. You're required to call ahead and pre register. On your first visit they'll give you a tour and answer all of your questions prior to setting you loose in the club. By coming to the club, you're not obligated to DO anything. Go, look around have fun and play to your comfort level. If you go, do let us know about your experience.

and since this post I've tried the talking thing and it gets no where.only arguing, manipulation and right back to the same shit.always what he wants to do, and whenever I suggest something I want to try he gets out of the mood and theres only one way to get him back. or we fight. and it never changes for the better. I've endulged in EVERY fantasy he's had and he can't even give me one. I truly believe this will end our relationship. and looking back? It wasn't worth it at all.

Although I had engaged in threesomes more than once before (MMF, FFM, FFF), as well as a couple of orgies when younger and single, I'd never actual tried swinging; let alone when married. My husband had only had threesomes (a couple of times when married to me), but never more. After being married a few years and already a couple of kids, we were curious about swinging and started to look into it, but didn't really get into much online before stumbling upon a couple we met through my son's preschool of all things. They had two young children like us as well and we hit it off with them, building a very friendly relationship, with plenty of get-togethers like BBQs, coffee times, date nights to movies and the like. Over time it was clear there was more to our relationship than just friendship. My husband was constantly checking the other wife out (we'll call her Tina, not that you'd ever know who she really was! LOL) and her husband (Andy) was doing the same with me (and, yes, us girls were very flattered and reciprocated- it really feels good being noticed after having a couple of kids! LOL). Tina and I also had some sparks between us, as we had similar tastes in clothing (both pretty feminine/girly girl types) and a woman's form (I am bisexual and was openly so then, too). So over time we started drinking more together at one or the others' place (kids always babysat, if you're wondering!) and doing things like dancing (and, increasingly, swapping partners for that, plus sometimes the wives would dance while the men watched and, yes, it was getting more sensual and, even, a bit lewd). We eventually started playing games like strip poker, jokingly played spin the bottle, truth or dare, and other silly games that might lead to some more naughty results. One night, we all had a lot to drink and the tension in the air could be cut with a knife, when Andy made the first move and slide his hand up my thigh and under the skirts of my dress, then kissed me. I looked a bit shocked but also smiled and looked over to my husband and Tina, who were clearly enjoying the show, so I kissed back and deeper, putting my hand on his thigh and hitching up my skirts a bit more, legs a bit more open too. He saw this as his invitation and slide his hand well up my dress as we kissed. Tina then turned to my husband and kissed him, while running her hand over his crotch. So then things really took off. Soon Tina was on her knees fellating my husband who was running his fingers through her hair with one hand and the other in her blouse playing with one of her breasts, which he'd pulled from her bra. Andy had 2 fingers buried in my puss as this was happening and our kissing got more intense, my legs wider and skirts hiked up much more. In time, Andy had his head up my skirts licking my wet puss, my legs wrapped around him, as I squirmed and moaned. By then, my hubby was behind Tina, her skirt to her hips and panties to her knees, as she was on all fours, her breasts now fully dangling freely below her as he fingered her with one hand and felt her breasts up with the other. She was still lactating after the birth of her second, so he was basically milking her a bit, too. There was so much moaning, sighing, gasping and the like then, and the air was filled with our scents. LOL After fingering and licking Tina to orgasm, my husband then filled her wit his cock and truly pounded her from behind. It was such a beautiful sight seeing her jerking and her breasts swaying, as she grunted and moaned. Andy could tell I was excited by what I saw and told me to kiss her, so I went to her and did that as my husband fucked her. She had such a sweet mouth and she was so eager to kiss me, our tongues played for what seemed like forever. As I kissed her and kneaded one of her breasts, Andy got behind me and filled me like Tina was filled and soon there were two girls grunting, gasping, and moaning. When our husbands were ready to cum, we each licked and sucked their cocks together: two wives enjoying each cock on their own. Our faces and breasts were covered by their cum (and our mouths had some, too). It was glorious! After our men were spent, us girls got together and enjoyed one another, kissing, feeling/licking/sucking breasts, fingering one another, scissoring a bit, then ending in a 69 position that was a beautiful time. When we orgasmed again, we all cuddled together, the wives together with Andy close to me on one side and my husband on Tina's side. We were so content and knew this wasn't the last time we'd do this. I later found out Tina had limited experience with girls, but did experiment a bit in high school and college, but nothing significant and she never considered herself bi. That changed after being with me during our swinging sessions. LOL We were regular from then on and still see them from time to time as part of our little group of swinging couples, early 15 years later (and we have done a fair bit more than we did that first time! LOL).

My husband has done most of the thread so far. For us we have many close friends from all backgrounds, colors and ethnicities. I imagine and hope we can experience the same swinging. We have only had each other for many years. Not intending any disrespect towards anyone, we are both attracted to people of color, particularly black men/women. I would love to wrap my arms and legs around a black man, soaking up the color contrast of our skin. Would love to receive it doggie style from a black man while going down on my husband. Hoping we can make this happen! I suspect we will have an easier time finding a fellow (including a single male) to help pleasure me. Am guessing we will need to find a couple to satisfy my husband, as trying to find a single black lady may be difficult-Which is fine with me, it may mean I get a 2nd guy...sorry husband. We are both excited to fulfill our longtime fantasies. Plan to go to Colette in Dallas or Players to start this adventure. Any comments on these clubs are appreciated.

Hotel takeovers are ok as long as you know what may take place. We are lifestyle cruise veterans (have taken 9 and 3 more booked) as well as avid Desire customers. Our hotel takeover experience is nothing like the cruises or resorts. Things we did not like about the hotel takeovers: 1. Cliquish groups - not very open to those that are attending the hotel takeover the first time. We heard this from others as well. 2. Pool not clothing optional - not even top optional. For a takeover, you would think there would be some additional fun with the pools during the day. But was a very vanilla experience for the pool time. 3. Hard to link up - one restaurant in the hotel so many scattered at dinner time to parts unknown off property. At the resort and cruises, meal times were another opportunity to meet other couples and link up. We had friends book a hotel takeover coming up in May in Cancun (not a Desire property). We told them to ask about the pool clothing optional and, sure enough, the pool is NOT clothing optional. Really takes away from a true lifestyle experience that can be found at resorts and cruises geared to the lifestyle. BTW, we don't have a hard time meeting people. We are official greeters for one agency that books lifestyle events (volunteer greeters) and hosts VIP parties. We love meeting people.

That was a great read. You described perfectly the joy in seeing your spouse happy and enjoying sex with another. No jealousy or insecurity. It's a beautiful thing to experience the gift you give each other during the scenario you described. This is why we swing. It's not so we can fuck someone else. For us it's giving each other the gift being intimate with another partner. We get much more out of that then the sex itself.

Each to their own, the world would be a boring place if everyone liked the same things. Personally we only play together as for us thats a big part of it, watching each other. Its good to share.

My sister in law is a gorgeous but very straight laced redhead. She started dating a guy shortly after her divorce was final and after several months decided to sleep with him at his place. Foreplay had just started when she heard him fumbling around. The next time he touched her, near her pussy, he was wearing surgical gloves!! Even she thought that was taking the germaphobe thing way too far. That was their last date. My point is similar to others, there ARE risks with any sexual partner unless you're having sex alone…then you run the risk of abrasion. Some risk is inherent in swinging but can be mitigated by refining your selection process. I can tell you that Mrs Doc would NEVER put a latex sheathed penis in her mouth and if I was told I had to use a dental dam to go down on a woman we'd be dressed and out the door in a heartbeat. We try to be smart AND safe without missing the best parts of sex which include skin, taste, texture, fluids and pheromones. It is a balancing act.

I can't answer about the swapping part only my experience in dating. I have never given a blowjob to anyone wearing a condom. I don't think it has ever been brought up. It is hard enough to make sure it is used during sex. As a matter of fact if we didn't have a condom, oral was all we were going to do before I was on birth control. About guys going down on me, not all guys have done that. Especially when I was younger. I read in another thread about dental dams and I laughed. I used to be afraid that I wasn't clean or smelled like flowers. I would make sure I would wash with sweet smelling soap. It is funny that I had no problem putting something in my mouth and worried about that. If I can take him in my mouth, I am not putting a rubber sheet on me. I enjoy getting oral sex. I have joked about breaking guys jaws and have been very satisfied with just oral. Recently for the first time in my life I went down on a girlfriend. no protection used. It was quite different than giving a blowjob and I think I want to again.

We've had a profile on AFF for a couple of months, and have had very little success with it. Our biggest problems with the site have been: 1. Couples contacting us (me) looking for a threesome with a single woman. We are a couple and the first sentence of our profile clearly states we are a couple and only play with couples as a couple. 2. Couples contacting us (as a couple), stating their interest in us and asking to read their profile and let us know if they're interested. Of the 3-5 couples we replied and said "yes, we'd love to meet you, let's set up a time and place" ZERO have contacted us again to set up a meet! 3. Single women rarely contact us (which we expected), but when they do, it's often a woman totally outside our description of who we're interested in meeting. For example, a married woman who's husband doesn't know she's on the site. 4. When I/we contact single women, they don't respond (also expected) or aren't what their profile states. I wasted a lot of time talking to a woman in my area, and it became obvious to me that she didn't really want to meet in person. She was/is a pic and story collector I guess... 5. LOL almost forgot about the single men! I've gotten lots of dick pictures and one-line emails like "U know ur hot, let's do this" or "am I gonna get lucky tonight?" They mostly end up in the junk box though. Our AFF account expires in May, and we will not renew it. I'd like to try SLS or another site that's geared more toward swingers. Trixie

Unfortunately, it depends a lot on where you are. My suggestion is always to take advantage of any free trial they offer and use that to search the site and get a good idea of how many people match what you are looking for locally (as well as check out their features). Then make a decision from there based on which one you're most likely to use. I won't promote a site that doesn't at least have some sort of free trial attached to it for that reason. There are new sites popping up every day claiming to be swinger sites and claiming to have hundreds of thousands of members. Looking back at your OP, you are looking for single females... your best bet is not going to be the internet. Most who have any success finding single females do so in their regular life or via vanilla clubs. Most single females (bi or not) aren't looking on swinger sites.... and unfortunately, most of those you will find (if you try to go the method I suggested above) are not real, so that's not even a good avenue. Some sites do more to cut out the fakes than others, but they all have them. AFF is probably the worst for being riddled with SF ads that are nothing more than promoting some girls cam, website or 800#.

I think ya'll are great people, but I have to give my opinion on this. I think it is not good to in a way tell people not to use protection. I'm sorry, and I am NOT meaning to offend you in any way, or imply that you have poor judgement. BUT there are people who read these posts. You have every right to your opinion, and every right to determine what you do with your body within your comfort zone. AND I know that there is no 100% effective protection other than abstinence. But I do think that people should be careful in saying that its okay not to use a condom, when people can read this and say "well, they don't use one, so we won't either." Now, this is completely jmo. And again, please forgive me if I offend. But condoms, although not 100% safe, definately are safer than not using one at all.