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The first time for my wife after we married was with an ex, then another ex, with my encouragement. So for both of us, it was exciting but without anxiety. A good way to start.

Every situation is different. When it's time to finish, the right place usually seems to follow from the context. I don't really have a favorite place apart from whatever seems to be the place where it seems hottest to the person I'm having sex with, based on whatever clues I get along the way.

Not a woman.....but can speak from experience and observation as well as knowing my Queen’s preferences. Penises like breasts come in all sizes and shapes. Not knowing how to use them in play or enjoy them is the biggest issue. I’m not huge but a good size and I have learned slow and take my time. I’m there for here pleasure and mine is secondary. We have had very hung men at our parties in the past.....sadly most had no game. Of the women who spent time with them none including my wife could give them a decent rating and most all where never invited back. Similar theme. He laid there waiting to be worship for his size and did nothing. Most would not know how or try to use their hands or oral. Most every one wanted to penetrate right away....slam it home....bang around furiously....all deep pumping. And a number of them could never get hard...fully hard or cum. Not to say we didn’t have a few winners. But only a few. Most women attending our parties and events liked the idea...the fantasy....and were very disappointed. Sad. But like I said we did have a few that were great....gentle and had skills. They were always welcome. The most popular man at our parties and events “G” man. A shortish, bald late thirties guy, funny....talkative....a little over weight. Sported 3.5” hard. Had huge energy. Could cum 5-6 times a night. According to our lady friends and my Queen...Very skilled with his hands and mouth. Great kisser. And he didn’t fuck. Well didn’t thrust. Almost couldn’t. But had the whole hump and grind thing down pat. Women who never orgasmed from penetration did with him. For lack of size he had mastered his moves. Every gathering he had a line of women waiting. And he still complained and felt inadequate with his size. It’s a male thing. Read, talk, learn and practice practice practice.....any size will do as long as it works.

We have done this multiple times - I love being watched and he loves watching me. It isn’t uncommon to want to masturbate while you watch. It’s even more exciting if her husband is there with you.

It felt like something that I deserved. It was a feeling of empowerment that I was fucking them on my terms. Even more so because they both knew about the other and still wanted me anyway. At my request, they met. They were monogamous with me even though I didn't ask, probably because I gave them both as much sex and love as they could handle. In time we began relationships with other women because I wanted it. It also freed me from my stifling religious upbringing.

I presume that you need a prescription for that. How did you explain that to your doctor?

This right here. You most likely need to work those pelvic floor muscles to get back in shape. Read up on it and watch some how-to vids. It's not difficult and you can do them throughout the day. If you really want to go pro, you can invest in some kegel balls that will help you actively work on it be clenching to prevent the ball from dropping out. No, definitely do not need to lay of the "bigger guys". Enjoy your sexuality! Just do your homework/exercising to tone up!

I once (many times, actually) fucked someone who fucked John Holmes. Maybe we should start a six degrees of separation from John Holmes thread?

When I was in my late twenties I started learning to edge & include meditative techniques with sex. Over several years I learned to control my orgasm, & able to delay or bring it on. It required regular attention to retain the ability. When I was in my late forties I let it lapse for fifteen years. It took a couple years to recover the ability & I found age has changed some aspects.

I asked my wife about this our first time having a new person (friend) join in. She said it was strange at first as she never thought of that person that way but as his cock teased her pussy she said it felt strange but her pussy was pulling his cock in... and in the end as he was thrusting he pulled out and she put it back in to let him finish in her. She said it was strange having another man cum in her and she did visualise his cum filled with sperm in her. Very erotic.

Our first experience, after about 25 years married, was with a couple who ran a (now defunct) swing club in Florida. Some of you may remember Bob and Nancy in Zephyr Hills. They invited us on a Thursday night to be initiated into the lifestyle before attending the weekend party. After a couple of hours of chat, we split up to have our first experience. I was playing with Nancy for a while and she with me. I gave her an orgasm with tongue, fingers and vibrator. Then it was time for that first penetration into someone other than my wife. I remember very little of the physical sensation, other than that it felt good, rather like every time I went into my wife. Nancy was soft, warm and welcoming, so physically it was not really unique. What I remember was the emotional sensation: here I am with another woman, a fantasy that I had dreamed of and anticipated for a couple of years. The overwhelming sense of satisfaction at being able to overcome the anxiety and ENJOY the experience was the "take-away". Meanwhile, my wife was with Bob, who showed her a new positions that was very pleasing. We used it many times in the following years. Interestingly , all the time I was with Nancy, I never thought about my wife being screwed by another man I hardly knew. We stayed for the weekend party and had a really good time with new partners. That was the beginning of the best era of our sex lives.

Well it's obvious he's hurting bad to start making threats. After all he would be outing himself too. This BTW does not minimize your pain either. I would be upset too to find my wife heading out with a partner without telling me. Making threats like that is a desperate ploy to get your attention and get back with you and a (bad) way of trying to control the situation and you. I don't think he would see it as designed to be deliberately hurtful but rather it is apparent he is too immature to understand that it won't (usually) work and that he would have more success facing the mistake and admitting it and working on a solution with you. Ending a 5 year relationship is a pretty drastic step. May I ask if you engaged in any counselling first? Secondly if you had counselling and it didn't work then I would suggest that next time he threatens you tell him that you'll have to explain to your friends if he does out you that he was too small & inept to satisfy you so you had to start going outside for sex.