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Tjudy, I really feel for you. I think the advice to just scrap all of this if it's not feeling right for you is good. Sometimes you just need to look out for number one. But aren't you just a little happy that your husband is enjoying it? I can certainly understand your feeling like you're getting less than he is though. You do need to let him know about your concerns. Forty four years? Well, we're almost to forty seven. We began the first time when we were in our twenties and then again in our fifties. Now I'm 71 and my wife is 66 and I'd love it if she met some guy, in the lifestyle, that she just couldn't resist. Heck, I wouldn't care that much if he didn't have a wife to share with me, I just want my wife happy. I really think that, if you find a couple with the husband someone you really find appealing, you will be able to just sort of ignore what your husband and the other wife are up to. And it just might make your husband a bit jealous and want to have reclaiming sex with you after the party. You might want to keep a blue pill on reserve, just for that purpose.

Oh dear. Well it's all good because, like I said, we're just having fun with the fantasy. Some lines are easy enough to not cross. I've gotten very accustomed to being able to pay my bills on time, and I don't plan on changing this habit anytime soon.

Is there something that you would like to explore that appeals more to you? MFM? Bi experience? If the whole hobby is just not for you, say so and scrap the mission.

Variety is the spice of life, but you both have to enjoy it. I use Viagra for other women because I need the boost (I am 61). I don’t need it for my wife, because she turns me on and I find her attractive and she knows how to get me going without stress. You guys need a big direct talk to make sure that you are both getting what you need. I will say give it chance, there are better and worse experiences. But my sexual relationship with my wife takes precedence over the lifestyle.

We've all occasionally met people in our day to day lives who spark an instant connection. You just...CONNECT. You find yourselves wondering if you know this person from somewhere, because there is something so damned familiar about them. And they fascinate you. You don't necessarily interpret it as sexual attraction (or maybe you do), but you find yourselves awkwardly struggling to prolong a conversation that has long since exceeded its polite expiry time in your particular social context. And you're racking your brains to come up with a socially acceptable reason to have to meet again to carry on the conversation. We've all done this. You've just met someone with whom you have wicked good energetic chemistry. Or, if you subscribe to such beliefs (raises hand), someone you've known in a past life who happened to stop around to say hello. Sometimes you don't even realize how compatible you really are until your clothes are off and ka-BOOM! Holy fuck! It's like being on a date with a Hitachi Magic Wand, because he just intuitively hits exactly all the right buttons. This was the case with one of my playmates. It surprised the hell out of me because he didn't strike me immediately as "my type". But afterward, I found myself groaning and squirming at just the memory of our playtime. And attracted suddenly to other men who were of a similar type. So this playmate happens to be exceptionally energetically sensitive. Like I said, he's very intuitive, and had me almost passing out with very light G-spot manipulation. In turn, I found that the thing he found most arousing was gentle, feather-light stroking of his cock. And the most surprising thing? Every wave of pleasure he experienced "echoed" in me; I could feel it as a sweet aching in that energy centre just below my belly button, and it flared in time with his. "Oh my God, what are you doing to me?" he asked. I'm like, "I don't know! What the hell are you doing to ME?" I figured it was me subconsciously playing around with his energy. I know there are a lot of rational types in this group - maybe predominantly so - but I'm hoping you'll look at this with an open mind. To me, this is a very real thing. I can't define it, I can't really adequately describe it, and I sure can't prove it to anyone. But this phenomenon is part of my reality, and I'm more than happy to incorporate its mysteries as part of my playtime. Anyone have any thoughts on this, or similar experiences?

That's unfortunate to have happened, I personally prefer to not really drink before sexual endeavors, better luck for a new opportunity also I got your message but I can't reply because I've not been a member enough days but no harm no foul.

Alura, watch the end The Graduate over again. Elaine is at the altar, Ben's in the choir loft, she runs out, he threatens people with the crucifix, they hop on a passing bus. Yeah, all this is remembered. But then . . . We look to the rear seat of the bus where Elaine and Ben are sitting. They look out that back window, Ben has this this huge smile on his face, Elaine's enjoying his mirth. Then, right at the end, Ben takes a huge sigh, they both become serious, considering what is it they've done, The Sounds Of Silence plays. Ben looks straight forward with a serious mien, Elaine looks to him for support, gets none. The camera shifts, we see the bus pull away into the distance, the future, fade to credits. I interpret that as "What did we do? What now?" and there's no resolution. A great scene. And BTW, the movie is streaming on Netflix as we speak.

They want a rematch. You must have done somethings right so don't over think this.

I love the way you write!!! I found myself actually, LOLing. This 21 Y/0 student is a potential for pure pleasure for you and also pure drama! But then, you know that. Tell him to check back when he graduates. I have a dear friend, who was a teacher and administrator with my wife before they retired. She told us of a similar situation she had. Only this was an underage high school student. He was always coming on to her and she would tell him to come back when he graduated and was over 18. Well, then she went on to say he did. I could tell by her smile that it was a pleasant surprise. And, knowing her, the young man got an excellent education after he graduated.

You know, I'm thinking that you might invite them here. Just message them and, first thank them for everything and mention that you had found a website when you were that new and that it had given some great advice. In doing that, if they do join this site, they'll probably read your nice post in this thread and be happy they found you and your wife.

I agree, be forthright with him! Swinging is meant to make a good relationship between a committed couple better, not to replace it with a 'Cheryl.' Simply tell him that until he treats you as well as he treated the other woman, you have no intention of swinging again. (Of course, you have to back that up with action, if he calls the bluff.) And now that there's generic Viagra, it's inexpensive enough that he doesn't have to save it for other people. Best of luck . . .

Tell him

Communication is the key. If you're uncomfortable you should say something. If he wants to change the game plan, he should say something. If you're in a place where your rules are evolving, you need to work twice as hard at communicating. I can understand his desire for being "natural and spontaneous" but you still need to communicate. Communicating can, and should, be natural and spontaneous too.

We completely understand what you are saying and have experienced the same types of energy. I think you hit the nail on the head when you said "exceptionally energetically sensitive. Like I said, he's very intuitive". In our opinion this person has learned to embrace their feelings and allows their sexual, intellectual and sensitive side to come out. This person knows how to read body language and use empathy to adapt to the situation at hand. If in turn you allow the energy to flow and fully give in to the situation the exchange will be beyond what most would consider normal. Most men have trouble showing these type of emotions openly, cause they might appear weak or vulnerable. Curious, what are your and his Zodiac signs?

Scarlet Ranch is a wonderful place. Very upscale, higher class than all of the Vegas clubs, although I've never been inside the Green Door. A variety of different play areas, from private (with a curtain drawn) to wide open. I have not seen the hot tub renovation, but there are many outdoor cabanas for your play pleasure. They even have a tepee! What are you people waiting for?

Every situation is different. When it's time to finish, the right place usually seems to follow from the context. I don't really have a favorite place apart from whatever seems to be the place where it seems hottest to the person I'm having sex with, based on whatever clues I get along the way.

I enjoy watching it shoot out and feeling the warmth, so I usually like it on my face or tits. If a guy wants to cum in my mouth, that's ok too. I'll usually just take it in my mouth as far as I can to feel it shoot down my throat and feel the pulsations and throbbing in my mouth.

You are the Cliff Clavin of this site!

Here are a few other similar nuggets: “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.” ― Mark Twain "Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you."

If my partner said this to me, and I trusted them 100%, that is all I would need to hear (at the time anyway, for sure). However... Over time, I suspect curiosity may get the better of me, and I would inquire. I think it is just human nature. As has been suggested... When the right opportunity presents itself (especially if he brings it up), it may be a good idea to come clean with the whole story. I agree that this woman is crazy, manipulative, and looking to cause a lot of drama. Unfortunately, there is no real defense against crazy. Another favorite guidepost of mine is: "Never argue with a moron. People who are watching may not be able to tell the difference." To be completely honest, I can't say that I always live it (I can have a fairly quick trigger when I feel that I am being bullied, or someone close to me is being threatened in some way), but pretty much without exception I have regretted caving and reacting to some rude (crazy) person's onslaught. The worst thing you can do is get sucked into her drama, and stoop to her level. If ignoring her feels like the safest thing for you to do, then that is likely the most prudent course of action for you. "Words may hurt, but silence kills..." - Shotgun Wedding - Timbuk3 If you can keep your composure, kindness is usually the better path to take. One of the premiere rules in the Swinger Lifestyle (LS) is that "No means No". ... If this person is repeatedly ignoring this, then it is quite probable that nothing you can do or say will deter them. You could go to the club manager / owner though, and explain the situation to them. (Be safe and smart about it however.) I bet they will know how to handle it. It seems highly unlikely that you are the only recipient of this persons disrespectful behavior. :-|

Run.