Leaderboard

Why should you be angry or jealous or disappointed? That's why we're in this activity of having sex with other people. My wife (and I) do things with play partners that we don't or seldom do with one another. It's an achievement in swinging to click with someone and reach a level of pleasure not reached before. Take some joy and satisfaction from your wife's pleasure. And seek your own. Maybe with someone else or maybe your wife and you can investigate and unlock what she's discovered. In any case, don't ruin the experiences for you and her.

"My wife worries that if things continue on like this, that I will grow to resent her" A very realistic concern. I'd listen to her. I don't know what your impetus was to start seeing other people solo, but I might consider scaling back on that and going back to swinging (i.e., foursomes) or (if you're into it,) MFM threesomes.

"You have a right to live your way." . . . As long as you don't hurt anyone

It's good that different people like different things. If everyone wanted the same thing, we would all be competing for a small subset of potential partners.

Adding to what Numex said, we've found that as we stretched our wings with play partners, we were able to incorporate the best of the techniques and experiences to enhance our sex life together. We were happy and compatible before we started swinging. Our sex life continues to get better even 15 plus years into swinging. I don't know a vanilla couple who can say that let alone demonstrate it for others to watch.

Against the advice of many people here, I recommend approaching someone who you know, she is attracted to, and is safe from both STDs and physical abuse. From my experience as the woman, I also recommend allowing them to start of by themselves the first couple of times so that they, and you, get comfortable with the whole thing. Then you can watch and participate.

We girls would go shopping. What does she like to buy?

First of all, start by making your relationship as strong and as great as possible. Swinging is all about love, trust and communication...and you can't have too much of any of the three. The best way to start the talk with your SO is to talk about fantasies. Find out what theirs are and tell them yours. Next step is to see about making some of them come true, usually starting in the bedroom and them venturing further out. Once you get to considering swinging, there are two paths to travel: quantity (just having sex with others, usually one night stands, and quality, or FWB or couples dating). Choose what your style is and move forward. Read most everything in the Curious About Swinging forum, set your boundaries and rules and then depending on what you are looking for either visit a club or set up an online profile (Find Swingers tab on top of page). Once you are at this point, come back and we can help you go from here. Good luck and have fun!

My personal recommendation on rules would be to make as few as possible to suit yourselves. I would also suggest that they be general in nature. Even then something will go past the line. Because of this one thing you need to absolutely agree on before hand is that neither of you will intentionally cross the specific lines in your rules, but if somehow one sees a transgression when the other does not is that the benefit of the doubt will lean towards innocence. That way the talk afterward can be "How do we make this not happen again" and not "How could you do that" Short story. One of our rules was no BDSM type play with playmates. My wife while feeling frisky grabbed the couples riding crop and playfully slapped the guys rump. I was not there and she recounted the event to me later as just another thing in a play by play recounting. To her it was no more than a slap with her hand or a tickle, to me she was using an SM play toy. The discussion took a few minutes with her promising to be more careful and my realizing that I was being too thin skinned, and telling her so. I told her clearly that she need not worry about "careful" because she would spend more time worrying than having fun, that I trust her not to hurt me purposely. Upshot? New understanding of the rule is now in play.

Check out the swinger sight that advertises here, Swing Lifestyle. (SLS) My wife and I met several guys there. If you need advise on how to attract a quality male in the quagmire of creeps, there is advise in the forum on how to best do this. It's not that easy.

A club is a good way to introduce yourself. If there isn't one around, maybe a house party or better yet a meet and greet. When you meet a couple, let them know you are first timers.

It sounds like she enjoyed herself, but you may be having issues with her having an experience that you haven’t had with her. I would suggest to continue talking with her and let her know how you are feeling

In a play room situation, asking to join is good. Its also good to just look for signs. If a couple are watching us and we want company, Mrs Doc has been known to simply reach out to the guy or woman and gently guide him/her to join us. In that situation eye contact and welcoming body language are a must. Pay attention. If you're unsure ask.

Keysandanklets.com for hotwifing.

Looks like we have some listening to do...Thanks for the info.

I agree with this. "Slutty" is a normal personality trait/behavior that gets indulged. Just because I'll sometimes spend lavishly on a delicious meal doesn't mean I'm a generally wasteful person. Fun and stimulation are an important part of life. Kind of related, but a little bit ago, there was a scandal on our little street when a neighbor had to throw her younger husband out because, to put it simply, everything he had ever said was a crazy lie. Not just about sex, but money and more. Mrs. E and the neighbor, a middle-aged professional, have been having dinner regularly since for girl talk time. She's has been wasting no time. She didn't just line up a fuck buddy, she's on a rotation of five regulars now. Her car is never in her driveway on weekends because she's away doing her thing on Match and Tinder. I'm sure she'll settle back down and won't even tell her next husband about even 10% of this, but for now, she's having a blast with it. So last night Mrs. E was explaining this to me and it came with a generic "can you believe that, so shocking" footnote. It clicked with me that even with everything we've gotten up to and talked about, she still has a hard time making the rest of the connection that it's completely normal. "Wait, she likes to fuck. How is that shocking? So do we." The five seconds of confused silence were priceless.

My number of sex partners is limited to three, but I do have an opinion, actually several. Comparing my two long-term, on-going guys, hubby David and Red have almost exactly the same length dicks - the width of my hand plus three fingers from the base of their dicks to just under the head. I would guess slightly over 6 inches. David is much thicker, however. While I can easily get my hand around Red, I can't even come close to touching my thumb to finger when I wrap my hand around David's dick. David is harder to work into my pussy, but I would say he feels better once he is in me. But both can really give me good sex - great orgasms - so size doesn't make that much of a difference, it's everything else from the foreplay to the motion to the dirty talking. Where it does make a big difference is in anal. Red likes to, so I let him put it in my bum on occasion; it's a long, slow go with lots of lube to make it work. Then for me it is just OK, I can't come that way. But hubby hasn't asked and I would never let him try anal with me anyway, he is just too big around. So the closest he gets is the front end of DP, which is really good for me. [bTW - My third sex partner, which I never mention since it was pretty bad, was about the same length and the same thickness as Red, but just terrible at sex for other reasons, mostly attitude.] P.S. - The other girls that hubby has played with (and I have discussed it with each of them and sometimes watched the experience), have all commented that they like his girth.

So do we, although Sheryl's prefers to have her playmates cum in her mouth.

Well I guess it all matters if you wine and dine you partner before sex....if you are in and out in a rush she will feel bad but if you set a picture session with a nice cocktail and some good nice words she want have a problem about you been small...

Oh yeah, I really want an 8" cock trying to penetrate through my cervix! That really turns me on! Seriously, I can see a large penis as more of a problem (for me) than of a desire. Size only matters with those that make it matter. For instance, some men don't care what cup size a woman is, a boob is a boob right? Great in all shapes and sizes right? They all have nipples ready to be sucked, and they all receive the pleasure from being sucked. Now, some men have a hangup on "if I'm going to be with a girl, she's gotta have at least a C cup", that's the same thing as a girl saying "I'm only going to be with a guy who has at least X amount of inches". For the rest of us, as long as it does the job, who cares? If I orgasm, it's big enough. Jan

I read an interview with a famous porn star (I'm pretty sure it was Asia Carrera) in which she said about size; "You can reach my G-spot with your finger. Anything more than that is overkill."