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We went to a party that turned into a gang bang. Really felt similarly to you. We didn’t know the hosts well. Far too many single men showed up. The house looked like it was between owners/tenants with minimal furnishings. The guys were mostly over machismo, treated the women, at best smugly, at worst with contempt like fuckwhore-toys. We looked in on the action a couple of times thinking it would be hot but girls were handled too roughly, spanked, fucked really hard and aggressively with guys lined up, cheering shouting, calling names. It really disgusted us. We had hoped to sneak into a quiet corner and entertain ourselves but when we saw this, we thanked the host and left. If your gut is telling you that something isn’t right, listen to it.

If they quit, they probably wouldn't be still coming here... just saying.

How would you feel about a profile that says 420 friendly? (Looking for those that are ok, and against it) Reason we are asking, we are a 420 friendly couple that enjoys it every now and then. We also find it to be mind blowing during sex with another couple. We don't want to post it in our profile because it's not a requirement, but we will give preference to those who are. But at the same time don't want to lose potential playmates that may think otherwise.

I am a male and married but very curious about swing and swap, it just making me horny as hell, especially reading the experience and stories, the sex chat is making to make love to my wife more often, she doesn't have some libido, no sex drive.

Similar to a previous discussion about couples watching each other masturbate. The answer is yes, we do. Fun.

While it is always easy to Monday morning quarterback, when you were there, you could have (and probably should have) asked the woman if she was okay with what was happening. Then there would be no questions now. Some women do enjoy being used as just a 'fuck toy'...it 'excuses' what is happening to them (in their eyes). Ms. Gold, while never having been evolved in a GB, has confessed having a fantasy of just being used by a bunch of men as a fuck toy. She's a submissive and the idea excites her knowing that she is just being used for other men's pleasure...not that she hopes this fantasy comes true, it is just a fantasy. If there is a next time, take the 2 seconds and just ask if the woman is good with what is happening and you will then be guilt free in the future.

If someone has a fear of STD's why would they be in the lifestyle to begin with?

Just what we need, ANOTHER lame reality tv show. I say bring back Gunsmoke, NYPD Blue, ER, St Elsewhere, LA Law, The Newsroom, hell, even I Dream of Jeannie. Someone in the 60's famously said that tv is a "vast wasteland". The guy should see it now!!

Give her time to absorb. And while it is absorbing, try to not make this all about you.

I agree....we had many of those. However, we also included mystery nights, dinners....a wide variety of games....most every one sexual.....meant to have those that are new or more shy mingle better with the crowd. Some were challenges....contests with prizes. Our game nights were some of the most attended and active days...and nights.

We've never participated in a gangbang, so can't offer any first hand experience there. I can say that like you, I would have felt uncomfortable in that situation too, even if I felt sure that being treated like that was something that I knew she wanted as part of the experience. It's just too far outside of "me" if that makes any sense. Now, if Mrs. cplnuswing wanted that, then I think I could do it just fine, but that's because I know her really well and so wouldn't have any of those qualms regarding: Is this what she wants, or is this what he wants? Is she really enjoying this, or is she just acting that way? Where's the line? This one is maybe a gray area, but I've always thought that the further away you get from the middle of the road on sex, the more incumbent it is on you to make sure that everyone involved is cool with everything and that get done up front, not during or after. Problem there is what is middle of the road for one is plain vanilla or totally over the top for others, so it's kind of a hard call to make. You also ask is this common in swinging, and to that I do have personal experience, and we've never encountered feeling like we were in a situation like that. So, I would take this as sort of an outlier, and use it as a learning experience to try to feel out a scene a little more before getting involved. Swinging encounters that don't go as well as hoped almost always have an element of lacking or missed communication to them, so don't feel bad, it's not uncommon and it happens to nearly everyone at one time or another.

Is it common to launch a verbal insults during a gang bang? My answer for you is, not usual but not completely unusual. Some women actually groove on this kind of verbal abuse. Because they make you uncomfortable, you should not go again the an event arranged by this particular couple. But you should not feel discouraged to try a gang band by some other couple. Now, I'm going to lend some advise for which you did not ask. Before your separation and divorce are final, you might be giving your spouse a weapon for "taking you to the cleaners" should she decide to bring up your swing activity with an attorney. Wishing you good fortune.

I do. Especially if I know they're thinking about me or looking at me (well, a pic of me) Such a turn on!

I too believe that sex work should not be a crime, but I would never avail myself of it. If a woman doesn't want to have sex with me for mutual pleasure, then I'd rather just move on. Just like I wouldn't enjoy paying someone to golf, hike, cycle or sail with me. To me the mutuality of sex, whether a ONS or marriage, is a big part of the fun. I (and my wife) do almost always pay for all expenses, including for entire vacations, so it's not that I'm cheap. Perhaps I'm fooling myself, but I see myself as generous to people who I click with, not buying an act.