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Hey, all. My husband and I just had our first swinging experience, and it's kind of blowing my mind. It wasn't planned, though we had talked about the idea of bringing another man into the bedroom. My husband is bi, and to be frank, I love dicks, so this is a topic that had come up a lot for us. We've been together for a very long time and our sex life is better than it's ever been, so I think that factored in to things going the way they did this weekend. Now I'm trying to make sense of it all! As we often do when we have a chance to get away, we went to Atlantic City for a couple of nights. We love having great restaurants and entertainment right there and walking the boardwalk, as grungy as it can be. There's something about AC that's just pure indulgence. On our second day, we hit the pool and had a great afternoon fuck and went for an early dinner. Dinner was wonderful and done early enough to hit the tables for a few hours. I like to play blackjack. My husband plays poker. Anyway, I sat down at a table that seemed to have a good vibe and got chatty, like I always do. There were guys sitting on each side of me, which is par for the course when you're gambling. Guy on my right was a douchebag. Guy on my left was charming and equally unimpressed with guy on my right. Time went by and I got on a good run. Most of the table was winning. Douchebag guy eventually bottomed out and left (yay!) and I got to know the other guy better. We had a lot in common, especially 100% sarcastic attitudes. We started playing each other's hands when one of us went to the bathroom, and before I knew it, it's 1am and my husband comes back from poker. I ask Blackjack Guy if he'd like to go grab some food because I'm fucking starving (this always happens at the tables) and we end up stuffing our faces with pizza slices. Now, hubs and I had talked about the idea of inviting a guy to our room, so I discreetly asked hubs if he was into it and he said YES. I felt like I was having an out of body experience, but I made myself just do it and asked Blackjack Guy if he'd like to have fun with us. Turned out he wasn't bi, but he was into the idea of sharing me with my husband. Seriously, I thought I would faint. We grabbed some mixers and protection and headed back to our room. They undressed me together, which was fucking amazing. A few minutes later we were all in bed and getting acquainted and shockingly, it felt so normal and natural. Blackjack Guy turned out to be really kind and thoughtful, and wasn't in any kind of rush, so we really enjoyed the hell out of each other. By the time we were done, the sun was coming up and I needed a shower, LOL. While I know it's probably not much of a feat to find a guy who wants to have sex, it really felt like we hit the jackpot with Blackjack Guy and now I'm wondering how we ever get to that place again. Honestly, the idea of soliciting people online or in apps freaks me out. I don't want strangers to use me. I want to have fun with people who give a shit about the people they're with...so I guess I'm wondering what we do now. We told Blackjack Guy he was our first, and he was surprised. He thought we'd done it before, but we were just winging it. I'm nervous about winging it again, but I'd love to find a bi guy for my husband. Would love insights from others who've ended up in similar position (pun intended).

To the OP... well, you messed up. As others have said, drugs and swinging is a bad combination. You need to work with your partner and try to resolve the issue. That said, I think your partner should have been more forthcoming with his objections. He could easily have said something at the time, in both cases. He certainly should have said something afterward. Hinting and dropping subtle clues doesn't do it. He should clearly and honestly express himself... and so should you.

Respectfully, I disagree. Swinging is about sharing. It requires communication, trust and honesty. When a couple establishes boundaries, they should be respected. Swinging is not a license to break the rules. It requires a different, in many ways stricter, set of rules.

Mrs. Alura and I hosted two parties a year to which we invited swinger friends and vanillas. We never had any trouble with discretion. I remember one incident, though, during which Mrs. Playmate was introduced to Mrs. Evangelical, a neighbor who lived two doors down. Mrs. Evangelical asked "How did y'all meet?" "I don't remember..." said Mrs. Playmate. "Mr. Alura and Mr. Playmate met in a bookstore," Mrs. Alura informed her. [True, an adult book store. We were checking our the Swingers Bulletin Board. Pat pointed out a 3X5 card and said "This is ours." I pointed to ours.] "Oh, I remember!" said Mrs. Playmate. "They were both looking for something for their wives." [True. We were hoping to find another man to fuck our wifes. It was good luck that each of us had a wife who was anxious to make that happen.] "They had coffee together and decided to take their wives out for dinner," said Laura. [True. After dinner we swapped.] "We've been friends ever since," said Mrs. Playmate [True. And swapping about once a month.]

Most people end up kissing a lot of frogs before finding a prince. You drew an ace and a 10 on your first hand. Good for you! If you continue to explore you'll find, like blackjack, that the cards don't always fall your way. Keep playing, you have a reasonable chance of 2 10's or a 10 and a 9.

On a serious note, the life expectancy difference between men and women generally is sad. Not only do women spend their later years without a spouse, but also without potential sex partners. I expect that I will predecease my wife, and hope that to the extent she still wants it she will have a someone who can satisfy her.

I did feel horrible. I was in a monogamous relationship and found myself in a threeway with a college friend and her friend. My first time with a female was an eye opener but letting myself be with a man who I just met made me feel like a cheater. With guilt I confessed to my then boyfriend. It caused friction in our relationship and chased him away. I felt I wronged my love. It took time to reconcile and we did and married. As a couple we have grown and realize that sex is sex. Sex is fun. Sex is respect. Sex is not always love.

My first time was with a girl that my husband and I were having a threesome with. It wasn't my first FMF, but it was the first where the girl was clear she had a Lesbian side. After my husband had just ejaculated into her I felt compelled to go down on her and loved it. After that I sometimes played with her alone and she was the first girl to do oral on me. I loved that too. The difference for me is that oral sex on a guy is usually either foreplay or postplay - although I do like a guy cumming in my mouth and like to swallow, I prefer he finish in my pussy. With another woman, the goal of me eating her pussy is always an orgasm. (Except I guess in those circumstances when I'm exciting her for a guy.)

i had a similar experience. my wife was keen to try swinging so i took her to a club and it was her lucky night as 2 young guys also there for the first time and wanted to take her in the private room. never knew what a thrill it would be to watch her being fucked especially by two young guys, what a thrill. when the club finished we took them back to our hotel room for more fun she had the time of her life !!!

We've decided that we'll play until people ask us NOT to get naked. I fully expect that won't happen until we're deep into our 70's. This is what 61 looks like….

Is swinging everything you thought it would be? We came into this not really expecting anything. It was a fantasy that we decided to try and fulfill. That we even have a relationship that is THIS AWESOME is amazing. Swinging is only the sprinkles on top of the sundae, we could have lived without them, but having them there is just a bonus. Are you finding it to be the fun and free lifestyle you thought? Yes. Having friends that you can get naked with or talk about sex with, or have sex with...it's a fantasy that most people have but they never take the steps or effort to achieve. I don't care how close you are to your (vanilla) friends, but you are not going to tell them what amazing thing you did in the bedroom last weekend (or living room, garage, front porch, hood of the car, in the park, etc.). It's great being able to talk about anything to your partner and/or your naughty best friends and not have them be shocked and dismayed. Were you looking for friends and can now only find people looking for sex? No, we only look for people that we are interested in becoming friends with first...the sex is just a bonus that comes afterward Are you happy with how things have turned out or a bit disappointed in what you have found? Overall, happy. It is HARD to find a four way match and takes time and effort, but once you find that match, all the effort is worth it. It may seem to be taking forever, but it IS worth the effort. Bonus question: Where in the Constitution or Bill of Rights does "putting sexual preference up front" get mentioned as a basic right? Amendment I Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. Amendment IX The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people. In other words, the rights of the people are not limited to just the rights listed in the Constitution. We are free to do or pursue whatever freedoms we decide to pursue since we are free men and women. It's what makes America great.

I am guessing you posed the question to women. I have been having oral sex with guys all my sexual life. I admit the first times I gagged, choked and vomited. With practice all that went away and it became fun and yes I didn’t mind swallowing. It wasn’t until years later, after college that I ever saw a vagina other than mine, that close up. After the first time doing oral to a girlfriend, something I can’t believe I did, I couldn’t wait to do it again. I never lost the enjoyment of guys and now still look forward to being with other girlfriends. My then found sexuality opened up more enjoyment knowing I don’t need to choose.

Seems more like comparing bananas and peaches....

This should be a must read thread for all who are thinking about swinging. We can say the same as just about everything above. I guess the thing that probably surprised us the most was how nice most swingers are, and then how hard it is to find compatible playmates but then on the flipside, how when everything finally comes together, how awesome it is. We've made some lifelong memories and friends through swinging, and you can't ask for more than that

The emotions actually turn out to be good feelings.

We adjusted by forming a closed group with other like-minded couples. It's possible, but very unlikely, that someone will cheat. There's just so much readily available among us - everything from a quick hard fuck to a date doing something the wife isn't interested in.

Even at that, if my wife wouldn't let me do her ass, and some other guy opened the way, I'd be thankful, not upset. BTW, my wife had anal with guys before we met, so it's no big deal to either of us.

It has now been about five years since we met our first couple. Linda found them on line. We thought they were fake, too good to be real. They were younger, good looking and he was pretty big. I was more interested in watching the women play. Looking back I didn’t want to watch Linda with him. When he finished in a few seconds I was relieved. Over the years we have matured our desires. I now want her to enjoy. I want her to have multiple cums. As much as I want to be involved it is fine if she plays with them and I watch.

For me, it's actually been the opposite. We started with my wife fucking exes (separately) because these were guys she had said she loved fucking, they were safe, and emotionally it was easy for me because she had already fucked them before me and they were exes for a reason. It was it was easy for her to set up, they met several times before hand, and they knew that I knew. At first they played alone, but later we did MFMs. Eventually she ditched them as we evolved to couples swaps within a closed group. Although I didn't mind and actually enjoyed my wife playing alone and the MFMs, I like fucking other women too.

Adding to what Numex said, we've found that as we stretched our wings with play partners, we were able to incorporate the best of the techniques and experiences to enhance our sex life together. We were happy and compatible before we started swinging. Our sex life continues to get better even 15 plus years into swinging. I don't know a vanilla couple who can say that let alone demonstrate it for others to watch.

My long time friend is coming out to visit us, from another state, and staying with us in our tiny one bedroom apartment. My wife and this guy really like each other, have flirted many times, and I have told both of them they have the green light from me to fuck if they want. I feel like if they do actually fuck, the situation you describe above will be what happens between all of us. I haven't seen her with a guy that she REALLY likes... so if this goes down, I suspect I will feel the same as you did! I feel it will be very intense and hot!

if she can handle it - double vaginal feels amazing for everyone involved. If you are interested in some anal play, get her a strap on and let her peg both of you. Suck his cock while she is fucking him - it will drive them both wild.

Seems like PrEP isn't widely taken/talked about in the ls community. I got a daily script for it but my doctor said I only really need to take it 5 days before and after a possible exposure. So swallowing a pill for 10 days in exchange for not getting HIV....I'll take that!! Nothing available to prevent other STD's other than what might be visible.

Agreed. TBH my wife is not big on giving me head. When she does it is like swallowing a stick and simply going up and down it. When she first tried another male (friend) I could see passion and how she loved it doing other techniques and with him swallowing. At first when guys would go down on her and me in the room, same bed etc... she was basically freeze and then pang she opened up, often forcing their head down to her pussy and then pull íng them up for the fucking. The most erotic part is seeing the male´s cock enter her and her face, reaction etc... when they are about to cum it is amazing.

yes u r right..its more hot to watch her with other man.. i did this with my wife... like to watch her sucking and fucking the guy the same way she do with me...it turns me on so much to watch her frenchkissing him too... i dont know why it turns me on too...but i love it..

We both equally love doing MFM’s! I really enjoy taking a pause in the middle of the action and watching my wife lost in the moment. A threesome if done properly- by both males working together to stimulate her-will really put her in over the edge. Of course-I love pausing and watching her enjoy herself-especially as we all reach the end and take turns. This allows her to focus on us individually (something she likes) and usually she is so lost enjoying each of us that pausing and watching is natural reaction at the time. I have really enjoyed seeing her lost in moment, free and really enjoying the experiencing. Her pleasure bring me pleasure-so there is no separation or "cuck" situation involved-after we are all focused on her and we both (the guys) got her to this point. Our friend would equally watch-he equally had NOT seen a woman this stimulated/hot so it was equally a goal for both men. If you find yourself in the moment...take the time to pause and enjoy the view.

You may want to consider being upfront with the guy about what you're looking for, and talk to him about it. We agree with the above.Dito To you two JC!!If indeed the folks involved are good friends,then bi all means,talk about it.True friends,even if he/she/they are not into swinging for whatever reason,should be able to discuss things together w/o fear of rejection or humiliation.And if nothing cums from it,at least you know for sure and can move forward with a regular friendship. Enjoy!!!