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@TricianMike: That sounds quite similar to us. We initially shied away from parties and stayed in the club scene. In the last few years, we've modified our approach to include house parties as well. Mrs Doc does the same thing, she often picks a guy she's just met. I hang around for a while both to watch her in action (its unbelievably erotic)and to make sure she's OK in the situation. Sometimes I'll join in for a bit or I'll wander off to find a playmate or group to join. Once she's finished, she'll often come find me and join in to whatever Im doing. For those few hours, we are free to have whatever fun sex we may find. At the end of the night, the ride home is a recap of the evening that often is so erotic in the telling that we end up rinsing in the pool and boinking each other one last time before sleep. Swinging beats the hell out of dinner and a movie on a Saturday night.

You are absolutely correct and I missed stating that. I think there is the misperception that it is a woman’s disease and the men in our lives are often oblivious to it in how it impacts them and their partners. I think we all need to raise awareness.

The key is patience on the part of the guy. Before we met, Mrs Doc dated a guy who was 10 inches plus and quite thick. She said that he always took his time to make sure she was aroused and well lubricated and then he SLOWLY eased into her until she was comfortable and until she started to move and rotate her hips. Once that happened, he was able to stroke but was careful not to drive or piston fuck her. He was very considerate and good in the sack. To my good fortune, he was otherwise a nut case and she eventually booted him and his big dick to the curb. We have 2 good friend couples where the guy is big, not quite as big the first guy but BIG. Both are consistently considerate and patient. They are generally well and wetly rewarded for it.

Great advice. We are SLS lifetime members. Although we rarely meet single men, we have three minimum requirements 1)public pictures 2) paid profile 3) certification by other member(s) SLS seems to have increased the number of single men over the last few years so you really need something besides a dick pic and a profile that has “I wanna fuck,” under every heading. If given the opportunity to meet a couple of single lady, be confident, articulate without being over complimentary or arrogant. We enjoy meeting regular guys who are funny and can carry on a conversation more than a hard body who is socially awkward or treats us as if we are getting the prize. We also like the advice of local “munches,” off premesis parties, or social meet and greets to get you feet wet without pressure. Great advice

We described a number of our earlier experiences in the stories section of this site. We were slow starters but once we were certain that sexual variety really IS the spice of life we had and continue to have a blast more than 15 years later. The key for us was the acceptance that we can have wild, orgasmic sex with other people without guilt, sneaking around, or recriminations afterwards. This is our reward for decades of kids, church, pta meetings, coaching soccer, cheerleading, and girls softball and generally being pillars of the community.

This had me thinking because our playing keeps changing. Normally Mike and I are in the same room. We were voyeurs in the beginning and a little exhibitionist. Now I enjoy new partners and Michael is good at watching and sometimes joining. At parties, depending on others we will both play and I will play both men and women. I search out a man I never met before. My choice is meeting a new man and experience the thrill of the newness. Michael says he enjoys watching me and then joining if the moment is right

I rely too on condoms for birth control. There was only one time that I experienced a condom failure. The rubber broke while a swing partner was inside me and I didnt notice. Good thing he owned it and never resulted in a pregnancy. To prevent stealthing, I do suggest: * Make it clear to partners that the consent is only valid when protected. And they will be responsible for any outcome. * Dont play when you are ovulating to reduce the risk. * Practice self-awareness during the play. I know this might lessen the fun but it can be done with practice. * It is better to play with people who you know personally (you know where they live, work, etc) and there is some level of mutual trust.

That has happened to me. Now I routinely "select all" and then "copy" as I'm writing to save my work and "paste" if need to.

Ok, that's unusual. "so how did you two meet?" "Well, it goes like this...." I've a relative who is now married. I asked he and his wife once how they met. They looked at each other with a bit of an uncomfortable smile (oxymoron there...) and then he said "We'd rather not say". Playdar went off big time... When I was 19/20, I had a girlfriend who went to see her gynecologist. Male gynecologist. This really bothered me. I know it's stupid, but at the time it really, really bothered me. The idea of another man looking at my naked girlfriend...just got me. I got over it of course, but coming from that I never would have expected to feel as I do now. I really, really enjoy watching my wife have sex with other men. I've puzzled over this for a long time when we first got into swinging but of course never figured it out. I gave up trying. I just enjoy it. There's just something very exciting about watching another man's cock slide in and out of your wife.

A bold, but in my opinion, a good way to go. Separate play eliminates much of the anxiety about what you should do and what your spouse thinks. There's enough going on with just getting the right rhythm with a new sex partner. The threesomes and same room play can come later when the twosomes are comfortable and all are ready for new thrills. We still keep going back to mostly separate rooms and alone play.

I originally met my wife(kitten) at my first ever LS experience. It was a MMF threesome. So it comes more natural for us than most. I do very much enjoy watching her play with others, male or female. I find I would rather watch her than play myself. When I was younger I never thought I would feel this way about anyone but its the bond that we have with each other that makes it easy. We do only play together that is our main rule.

As always, if it works for you, have a ball! I feel that my wife's safety is paramount, she does too, and if she goes off with a man she'll text me a picture of his license plate, the address where they are playing. We also have our phones set up so we can track them, if anything suspicious happens I can go to that location. If worst came to worst, I could always hand this information to the police.

Mrs. Alura and I hosted two parties a year to which we invited swinger friends and vanillas. We never had any trouble with discretion. I remember one incident, though, during which Mrs. Playmate was introduced to Mrs. Evangelical, a neighbor who lived two doors down. Mrs. Evangelical asked "How did y'all meet?" "I don't remember..." said Mrs. Playmate. "Mr. Alura and Mr. Playmate met in a bookstore," Mrs. Alura informed her. [True, an adult book store. We were checking our the Swingers Bulletin Board. Pat pointed out a 3X5 card and said "This is ours." I pointed to ours.] "Oh, I remember!" said Mrs. Playmate. "They were both looking for something for their wives." [True. We were hoping to find another man to fuck our wifes. It was good luck that each of us had a wife who was anxious to make that happen.] "They had coffee together and decided to take their wives out for dinner," said Laura. [True. After dinner we swapped.] "We've been friends ever since," said Mrs. Playmate [True. And swapping about once a month.]

For us (the three women in my poly family with two men), so long as neither an erection nor an ejaculation is wasted, the guys can stimulate themselves. Otherwise, it is a scare resource being wasted. They can only masturbate if none of us women are not around, like if the guy is out of town. A harsh rule, I know, but necessary.

"Some people do things on vacation that they might not do at home." True, but . . . when on vacation, particularly when under the influence of alcohol or drugs, stuff happens and then feelings can get hurt. Drama! Tread carefully.

If you want to catch fish, start fishing in a pond that you know already has fish in it. If you start fishing in a pet store, while there's ALWAYS a chance you may catch a fish, you probably won't catch the kind of fish you are looking for.

That's precisely why we don't use condoms. Both the men and women like to feel the flow of an ejaculation inside her, whichever opening that may be. We also jointly have no rules against kissing, anal, alone play. We see the emotional connections as a plus. We are all comfortable with this because we only play with a closed group of other couples. Could someone cheat? Perhaps, but we have a lot of trust among us and agree that anyone can back off anytime, no questions even by a spouse. Plus it's less likely anyone would cheat simply because there is so much opportunity for fun within our group. For instance, one pair of non-spouses occasionally gets together alone for their mutual interest in BDSM, which no one else is into.

Gaga, it's your life . . . literally. Do as you wish, accept the risks. If things turn out badly, remember you asked for it.

‘Stealthing’ Case Leads To Verdict On Sexual Assault Charges For Police Officer If someone did that to my wife rape charges would be the least of their worries. It might be the one time I grab another man's genitalia - in order to rip it off!

If 2 people agree to have sex with a condom, then half way through one takes off the condom when they think the other isn't in a position to prevent penetration, they are lacking consent for that alternate penetration. That amounts to rape.