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When we first started we enjoyed meeting new people. Not every couple was great but we had had an excitement of being with people we just met. Over time we made some great friends that we still enjoy playing with. Mike and I enjoy our friends and our friendships are not something we want to give up. It’s funny how much more we talk about our evenings of play when we meet a new play partner or partners. Our first reason for swinging was the excitement of new partners. I won’t call it a conquest though after we do meet a new couple there is an exhilaration after. I would say our new meetings with new people is usually more satisfying for both of us. Do others enjoy new partners or staying with the people for all your play?

To add to this and I agree... most are very polite. We did meet up with another couple a few years back and the guy was a bit more aggressive than we expected. I think his wife liked it that way. As we were engaged my wife was blowing him as he was about to cum, and our rule is not in the mouth he jams his cock into her mouth and erupts, keeps it in there as she pushes it out so she swallows. We had a nice discussion later with the hosts of the party and they were not welcomed back.

My wife and I have been talking about a threesome with another woman. This is going to sound strange but the idea doesn't make me go completely crazy. Our sex life is fantastic. We've been married over 10 years and I feel like it's better than it was in the beginning. I guess my issue is that the idea of having sex with another person doesn't really get me going. And I'm not sure how I would react to seeing her with another person. It sure sounds fun and I'm wondering if I am over thinking it. She had two lesbian experience in high school but she didn't doing anything to the other girls they went down on her. With that being said, is it common that when engaging another female that she wouldn't get any attention from my wife in the way of oral? I've never been on a site like this. I thought this might be a good place to ask people what they have experienced. I apologize for being such a newbie...

The wife and I went to our first club/resort this past weekend. The place has on site rooms/pool as well as a nightclub and playroom. I told my wife prior to going.. I'm not sure 100% what to expect but I feel like Ive been waiting my whole life for this weekend. Neither of us has ever done anything close to this but I knew deep down that we were going to have fun.When I arrived at the place I knew I was home.. LOL Spent the afternoon out by the pool/hot tub. Ive never been to a nude anything but I dove right in with that and adjusted rather quickly lol. My wife was a little more reserved and decided to stay in a bathing suit although I had her breast exposed pretty quick. LOL Later that night we did the nightclub for a bit then headed for the group playroom. Just like I imagined I picked a spot and fucked my wife's brains out in front of a bunch of strangers.Almost like it was second nature We both LOVED the experience. We didn't play with anyone else etc.. Just enjoyed the whole experience together. A couple of things I was curious about in general.. Like I said before fucking in front of people came quite easy to me and my wife was was certainty able to relax enough to enjoy herself thoroughly. Did the first time for some of you in a setting like this seem oddly familiar as well? lol Second question is.. After reflecting on the night and our time in the playroom area one thing both of us kind of took note of in hindsight was that there seemed to be more couples watching than fucking. In the group area you are not allowed to wear clothes(except lingerie etc) so everyone is generally walking around in towels. At first I assumed that everyone walking through the playroom was looking for a spot to fuck but later when I thought about it I didn't see as many bed spaces taken up as I did people. It was almost like alot of couples were just there to watch. I have absolutely no problem with that but was just wondering if any of you notice the same at the places where you go.

We are both 59. Not boring though! The age range was all types, just as body types, etc., there were all kinds there. We did not indulge with others, but I did enjoy groping her on the dance floor. The bondage convention that Saturday was a little much for us, but I was informed that this was not a typical weekend. I would certainly return but there are quite a few that I would check out beforehand.

I think as swingers, we evolve with experience in the hobby and as we grow older. Initially, we were drawn to the club scene and the opportunity to meet new people practically every weekend. Over the last 15 years, the clubs have ceased to be our focus. We've met a decent sized group of snow birds who we house party with once a month or so from Sept to May. We continue to be open to meetings off SLS or SDC but not nearly as frequently as we once did. And, we met a newbie couple several months ago where the four of us click on multiple levels. Sex with them is quite amazing and comfortable even after the newness wore off. We're planning on introducing them to our house party group as well. I haven't decided if this is just a natural progression for couples or geography/demographics of if we've been incredibly lucky.

It is a word (and a board game), but it's Mon-opoly

Well again....it reminds me of a line from Goldie Hawn in a movie.....”we’re not prostitutes....we’re housewives...we give it away!” Well, not really. Every one has a line they will not cross. And like many lines it isn’t always straight. I am one that believes that with some guidelines and licensing if you want to do this for fun or money you should be allowed to make that choice. The claim is it is the oldest profession in the world....I expect it is. In the US we have peculiar double standards....especially when it comes to sex.

Agreed, patience. And enjoy the journey as the adventure unfolds.

Hi TnA83. My wife and I were talking about Caliente the other day. What did you think of it. What was the general age range?

No, but I would like to know what I'd be offered. I probably wouldn't fetch much now as an over thirty mother (maybe, I'm in good shape), but when I was nineteen and looked thirteen (small tits, very little hair), probably a lot from certain people.

After two years of hubby allowing me to have a boyfriend, I decided that I could tolerate the idea of him having sex with another woman, so long as I got to choose. It wasn't difficult among my friends and acquaintances finding a woman willing to have sex with my husband, but more difficult to find one that would even let me watch, let alone be interested in pussy licking either way.

I came into this thread expecting a discussion about delicious cake. This is especially of interest to me because I’m on Keto and can’t have cake. I’m disappointed.

When we started, we had a bunch of silly rules. We quickly saw that they were silly and did away with them. If this is what she needs to get started, then take it and run (but do not violate her rules). They will either be set aside, or she will not be interested in continuing. Good luck and let us know how things progress.

Like any other family we have our disagreements, which can be emotional. What I have observed, however, is that (unlike a traditional couple) in a poly family the two opponents have others to run to for consolation, support, psycho-therapy, and yes, sex. The others not only provide support, but also help reconcile the two that are fighting. It is a big advantage to maintaining our family.

We wouldn't turn down what was basically an advanced makeout session under the right circumstances, but I think you should both be honest with yourselves about the possibility that once you get to that point, hands do have a way of finding themselves down pants. Your wife probably realizes this intuitively and is hesitant to acknowledge it, but it's probably worth making sure, between the two of you, that she knows you won't be judgmental about it. We tried to set some "solo soft swinging" rules for when we're apart for business travel and even in the first conversations, quickly realized the barriers between kissing and handjobs/fingering are almost nonexistent, and once a cock is out and tongues are already mingling, oral just happens.

To clarify - the small percentage of times that I cum in a woman's mouth I refrain from pushing in. Everyone in our group is extremely polite, sensitive and accommodating and I try to be too.

Why? Everybody who’s ever taken up ANYthing — golf, piano, beekeeping, swinging — was a newbie at one point.

This is going to be tough. Lots of couples write off other couples for simply being soft swap only. Not all couples mind you, but it narrows your search. I'm going to recommend something a little crazy: Book the two of you a trip to Hedonism 2 in Jamaica. Here is why: As long as you both can handle seeing OTHER people have sex publicly -- it will be easier for her to experience this very specific requirement. In fact, there were women and men making out in the pool and just touching breasts in the pool at all hours. There was NO pressure. None at all. You could just hang out and talk the whole time if you wanted. You can hang in the prude pool with a bathing suit, or (I recommend) hanging out in the nude pool where the party is. It's a controversial piece of advice, I know -- but our first exposure (true exposure) to the Lifestyle was at Hedo. We were never pressured at all. We made great friends that we didn't sleep with, and we also saw a lot of crazy stuff. However, my wife has gotten used to people requesting (and being given permission) to touch her breast in the pool. lol

If there is any hope of it going further you have to respect her decision now with no expectation to go further. There is no need to dive in faster your wife is ready for.

Having been there, done that, doing it again, I endorse your fantasy.

Like njbm said, our first cut is are they nice and do we like them? For us, the answer to that has nothing to do with race, color, or any of the myriad of other ways to categorize and label people. Now, having gotten past that first hurdle, are there people that we may find more exotic simply because they are so different from us? Yes. Could that difference add some icing on the already baked cake. Yes. So to the OP's question, assuming I liked her, would I find an Arab woman exotic in a sexy sort of way, yes. The way I look at it, it's just the wrapping paper though. Superficial to what's inside, but still, something that may catch your eye, and more to some than others since all brains are wired differently. Or to use another example, it's like hair color. Would I ever turn down anyone based on black, brunette, blonde, red, etc? Absolutely not. Do I specifically seek out women with a certain hair color? Nope. If there was a woman of any skin tone with a red buzz cut, would I consider that exotic? Yes, simply because I've never even met a buzz cut redhead, so that exoticness is likely to pique my interest a little bit. I've never felt hair that short on a woman, it would seem very very different to me, and therein lies the interest. Do I have some sort of fetish for super short hair on a woman? Nope, not at all. As a general rule even, don't like it. Some can rock it and look great, but for most it's not the best look for them, or at least to my eyes it's not anyways (not that what I think really matters).

Seems more like comparing bananas and peaches....

My GF and I are interested in being swingers with no experience. In our 40’s and have been together for years. We booked a trip at the end of March. Any advice? Looking forward to dancing and eating, drinking and meeting new people either way. Anyone been here in 2019?

ClosetSwinger, this is a good situational question for swingers to address, as I'm sure many couples swing with other couples where one half works, and the other half doesn't. And, if its your half that doesn't work, you really hate messing it up for everyone else ... but, hey, we're all adults here, and eventually it happens to everyone. It could be as innocent as crooked teeth, or tattoos when you hate tattoos ... could be anything. With us guys, if it doesn't work for us, we unfortunately show it with a limp wick. So, the first thing you got to do is quit beating yourself up for it not working. Its like you blaming yourself for not being able to reach orgasm with a new partner, and then saying "I don't know what's wrong with me". Good sex is sometimes very complicated for literally millions of reasons. I guess your posts and explanations creates curiosity for me ... like, what specifically turned you off, or what you didn't like about him? Did he have physical imperfections, or maybe move too quickly the first time, etc? I'm a guy, and I prefer "directness", but many people can't handle that. I believe, however, if you have some casual conversation & drinks with him, and explain your situation, even though it wouldn't be what he wanted to hear, I believe he would appreciate your honesty. If it is something simple like bad breath, a wart, or dirty nails, he'd probably appreciate you bringing his attention to it. Are all kinds of intimacies off the table, or is it just intercourse? Could you enthusiastically give him a BJ or HJ? I can tell you, many guys love a woman to give them handjobs. Speaking personally, I get a kick out of watching the woman's face as I begin ejaculating ... seeing her facial expressions, etc. as she acknowledges her accomplishment. So, if BJ's or HJ's are acceptable, tell him that ... possibly that will salvage the relationship, and as time goes by, possibly the thing that's clicking you OFF, won't click you off anymore.