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We are a married swinger couple. This response is being written by the Mrs. We have had numerous SM join us for an MFM which have turned out to be amazing. Very sensual, very respectful to both my husband and I, and truly understood the meaning of him being a SM joining us as a couple for an MFM. Everyone was involved and all different positions took place making sure the focus was on the woman from the two men. In the end everyone walked away happy. There are very few of these types of SM in the lifestyle that we have found, so when we do have the pleasure of finding one of the good SM we try to hold onto them as long as we can. We have also had some not-so-good experiences with SM joining us for an MFM. These experiences consisted of the SM telling us what he knew we wanted to hear and involving all three in different scenarios which seemed very hot, but once we invited him over and play started, everything he told us his actions were totally opposite. He was more trying to monopolize me and limit my husband's involvement as if he was doing us a favor by joining us for an MFM and not realizing that he was not NEEDED by us, but was invited to join us for additional pleasure. He didn't seem to realize that he was there for OUR enjoyment as if he was a toy brought into our bedroom for the time being. I am always interested in chatting with SM on a site because there are some good apples out there and just because we have come across some bad ones doesn't mean all the SM should get the same bad rap as those that are disrespectful, arrogant, and feel their entitlement to dominate the wife during an MFM. The good ones that you can/may come across are definitely worth keeping and enjoying for some hot, sexy, intimate MFM playtime. A lot of SM will PM me on the swinger's site we belong to and I always give them the chance to speak with me and get to know them a little bit. Most of them start out great, but within 10 minutes of chatting they shoot themselves in the foot by stupid comments such as "I can't wait to fuck you" or "I will eat your pussy for hours and you will love it" or I am going to eat your ass and then fuck you so hard that you will be begging for more". Never once do they ask what I may want or if I even like what they are telling me they are going to do to me. It seems to turn into all about what THEY want to do or enjoy and no care or concern or consideration about what I want or how my husband and I may be picturing the MFM to turn out. They get eliminated immediately. I don't need any SM telling me what I want or like without even a consideration of IF I want or like that. Those are the arrogant ones that just are listed as a SM to join a couple for their pleasure of getting laid, and not for the true enjoyment of what a real lifestyle MFM for us should be. There are plenty of rude and disrespectful SM out there, but I'm not willing to eliminate the entire field of SM because of those that don't know the etiquette of joining a couple as a SM in an MFM. If I were to do that, then I would be selling myself short on finding some of the truly good and respectful SM who are knowledgeable about what their role is when being invited as a SM to join a couple for a hot, fun, sexy MFM. I am willing to weed out the bad to find the good and hold onto the good ones as long as possible. Bottom line is there are good and bad couples you will find, good and bad SM you will find, good and bad SF you will find, and depending on how you handle the bad situations that may occur can make a huge difference in how you approach your future desires in the lifestyle and hopefully won't limit yourselves by excluding an entire group just because of some that try and ruin it for the others. Every situation can be handled the way you chose to handle it, but we have definitely found some very well respected, well liked and very sensual SM to join us and make some great memories with us in MFMs.

Brand new to the lifestyle. Looking for a single male. This is proving to be a little challenging. Any I've spoken to have been very rude/crude. There seems to be a total lack of respect. My question is....are there any respectful single men on here or am I just wasting my time? Should I just stick to married men? Thanks.

Nice tip about elbows and knees. I also spray perfume in the air and walk through it so my hair smells good. Husband and I use more scented lotions and oils on arms and legs not nessisarly in kissing licking areas. As to woman smell I noticed after menopause my "smell" changed. I Miss my own muskieness, husband says I still smell nice. I have to believe him cause no way in hell am I flexible to get my nose down there to tell.?. As we have gotten older I have noticed his cum smell is not as strong either. I can remember my underwear smelling like him next day after sex when we were younger. (Even after showering) I do use underarm deodorant and sometimes under my breasts if it is really hot. I'm built heavyer there and gravity and I are no friends.?. As long as someone is clean smells should not be a problem.

Similar situation. More curious than anything. Keep us posted

We've been a full swap couple for over a decade. Yet in that time, we've also met and played with soft swap couples. For us, good sex does not necessarily have to involve penetration. We like orgasms and we like sharing them. If Mrs Doc gets off several times during an encounter that doesn't include penetration she still has orgasms. If I get a blow job to completion Im certainly not going to complain that it didn't happen balls deep in the woman. Each couple, each encounter is different and that's one of the main attractions of this hobby.

Don't be concerned. The LS embraces all levels of participation. A simple "no thanks, we're not at that point yet" is just fine. Some never get beyond your current stage. Everyone else passed through your stage on the way. Just remember to keep your minds open. Your comfort zones may change.

We are still in the "watching" phase. A soft swap is our agreed upon next step. We admittedly have concerns about encountering an experienced full-swap couple who will not understand our current limits.

I have physically measured three men. My husband was the smallest of the three. He is 5 3/4”. His friend who I am with often is 6 1/8”. I would say he is thicker than my husband too even though I haven’t measured that. The only other person I measured was a boyfriend I had years ago. He was 7 1/2”. He swore he was 9 inches, the reason we measured. My husband is far from being the smallest, I think he is above average. He thinks he is small but I think plenty of men think they are small. Then there are those who think they are a gift. It’s funny how some women gravitate to well hung guys at parties and others stay away.