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Been lurking for a loooooooooooonnnnnnng time, used it to educate my self and wife...but wife does not want participate at this time, maybe in future (she says)...I respect her wishes and I envy everyone who does enjoy this lifestyle...it must be difficult to find 4 people that like each other..or at least respect each other's boundaries...I haven't given up hope that she'll get motivated soon. Thanks for listening

I understand the well intentioned thinking but ultimately someone is being left out of the loop and eventually the truth will come out. It is dishonest and may lead to more problems. I think a better approach would be to agree to meet to see if there is any interest in future play but be clear it’s not going to happen at the first meet.

We almost always play in the same room, but lately we have experimented with separate rooms. I know that he loves to watch me with other men or couples, but I wanted him to feel like he could focus on his own pleasure. We were recently at a house party and he was getting the attention of two ladies on the couch in a back room. I left him alone and moved to another space with some friends. I returned about 30 minutes later and it was hot to see him curled up with his new friends. He was gently kissing one woman while the other was slowly riding his cock. He had no idea I was watching and I could tell he was completely immersed in the experience in a way he would never do if he knew I was there.

My wife and I talked openly and freely about our past sex partners from the beginning - who was good and what we liked. So when I encouraged her to have fun again (separately) with two past lovers who she really enjoyed, there was nothing to get used to. They already knew their way around one another's bodies, and in my mind it was no big deal. A very easy start for us.

This ?????? Same with us for the most part. We don’t advertise, however, we’re not going out of our way to hide it. We are who we are, don’t like it then adios amigo.

If you are talking about setting up a meeting with someone else wIthout your wife knowing about it in the hopes that it will turn into more then I would say no don’t do it! If you are not 100 percent on the same page with each other and do not communicate openly about lifestyle choices with each other then you are not ready to enter the lifestyle. Trying to trick someone into doing something never goes well and is a good way to never have them trust you again. Not to mention you have no way of knowing if the person on the other end is going to play along with it the way you want them to regardless of what they tell you before hand.

We would rather have our naturist and lifestyle activities remain private. I don’t think most vanilla people understand these pursuits. We would not like to be the subject of animosity, derision or suspicion from vanilla friends and relatives.

You can't do that legally in Las Vegas. You need to plan your "vacation" destination to be one of the counties in which your plans are legal. If you don't care about legality, you might as well stay home and look where you live.

I’m with Shore. Me on top with my husband cowgirl. Missionary meh. With our friend he enjoys reverse and talks about what he sees. Thinking about it we almost always go from 69 to me creeping up to reverse. At parties if I am with 2 guys reverse and a guy in front of me. If with a couple many times cowgirl with the other girl face sitting. Then again at parties there is plenty of doggie.

Wife says she likes how deep I go during reverse cowgirl. I enjoy her playing with herself and my balls while in that position. Doesn’t take her long to have an orgasm!!

Had a Lola moment last month. The same but different than the encounter described in the original post. My FWB & I met another swinger couple for dinner. Cindy & I are both bi & the wife of the couple identified as bi & the husband 'bicurious'. I immediately started thinking the lady was more than she claimed, her voice being very masculine. Tho she was femme in a sturdy farm girl kind of way. Once we all got naked back at Cindys apt it was immediately clear she was surgically transgendered. Not the first I'd met & had sex with. In this case we just rolled with it and had a hour of great sex. Post debaucheryCindy did bring up the subject & there was a brief conversation. But, I think the wife was relieved we did not start a extended conversation on it, and that we we accepted her & that she could engage us as a woman without any fuss.

Only if you want it to. And mainly for the husbands.

Our first time with a much bigger guy was at Hedo. Previous to that all of our full swaps with couples or single play involved average guys. This guy looked pretty average at the pool but when we got back to the room he ballooned up to about 8”. I could tell that my husband was concerned but we played and had a great time. The next day we really didn’t debrief and just rolled into our routine of morning cocktails, hitting the nude beach and pool and then dinner and night club. At the club and after a lot of drinks he finally asked me how he was. I told him that his big penis was surprise and that he felt good - he was a great partner and knew how to use it. He asked me if he thought that his wife was satisfied with his smaller cock. I told him that we didn’t talk but that it clearly looked like she had a couple of orgasms. We both have a lot of partners and talk a lot about our experiences good or bad. I’ve shared my thoughts on big cocks here before so I won’t repeat. Bottom line - some guys can handle watching their wife get taken by a bigger guy and others can’t. It’s about communication.

Turn it into an MFM?

Thank you lcmim and NudistSwungers for the support It was actually a year ago May that I stated in a marriage counseling session that I was reading about marriages and relationships and love and trust and honesty and communication on this site and that there is TONS of solid gold info here. My wife and the counselor both had collective heart attacks. The counselor then drones on about how she was worked with many people to overcome the “devastation” of swinging. My response was that she only sees the train wrecks. The successful relationships that I see here don’t pay folks like her by the hour to tell her how good their relationships are. She was not impressed

Top Ten Newbie Mistakes: 10. Putting on the "Strap On" backwards 9. Ruminating on how much it "tastes like chicken" 8. Putting pictures of your Social Security Card on your personal ad 7. Putting flyers in all the neighborhood mailboxes 6. Asking the other husband, "So how's this bitch work, anyway?" 5. "Assuming" they're into watersports 4. Asking if you can get the "rode hard and hung out wet" discount 3. Screaming, "I'm CUMMMMING!" in that funny Elmo voice 2. Telling your new playmate she kisses like your sister And the number one newbie mistake: Explaining how you plan to tattoo all of your "conquests" on your impressive three inch weiner... Spoomonkey

I am still to new to know what most of our mistakes are, but I wanted to add We have changed our profile 7 times now.

Linda and I'd been swinging for a few months when we hooked up with a couple in a small town about 50 miles south of here. We met at a Mexican restaurant, and we weren't all that crazy about them, but hey, we'd driven 50 miles to see them, and so we went back to their house, following them. They were about ten miles further out, lived off a dirt road, and you had to drive through a 30 foot long mud puddle on the "driveway" to their house half a mile away. We made it through okay (they briefly got stuck, but got out of it). Once there, we chatted a bit, and then the lady makes her move on Linda. Then her husband made a move on Linda while I paid the wife some attention. We're all in the floor, me licking the lady, the guy fucking Linda. Suddenly, the lady sits up and shrieks, "I said, NO KISSING!" and tries to hit her husband (who was NOT kissing Linda...and we'd not been informed that it was against the rules either...but they weren't kissing). She hits Linda upside the back of the head TWICE and storms into a back room. I tell Linda. "Get dressed. We're leaving now." My only thought is that the crazy psycho rock'em sock'em bitch has gone to get a gun, and we've got to get out. They live on a lake miles from civilization. No one would ever find our bodies. Twenty seconds later, we're dressed, and the lady storms out, "Y'all just finish." I told her, "Oh, we ARE." And we left within another eight seconds. I drove our Honda Odyssey at about 45 mph down their driveway, plowed through the mud puddle and slid sideways out onto the dirt road before flooring the car and getting us home ASAP. We laugh about it these days, but it had to be the most terrifying disastrous experience we ever had. Fortunately, the overwhelming majority of folks we've met are really nice people with whom we have a good time, but we'll never forget that night.