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...because you're not ready (yet). In order to be successful in swinging (or a 3some) you need to be in a solid committed relationship. If the relationship is less than granite, then you start worrying about everything else...is she better/prettier/someone he likes more than me? Am I not good enough for him? Etc. Wait until you have a wonderful relationship built around the big three (love/trust/communication) and then see about moving forward.

Something strange and can I say uncomfortable occurred a few weekends ago. We are not very involved on a regular basis in swinging. I like to say we enjoy swapping and have been to a very limited number of full swing parties. Our regular swap partners live far enough away that it is real special occasion when we visit them or they visit us. I am still not totally into girl play and as we say I am at last open to some play. We were invited to visit our friends, they told us we would be just the four of us one night and asked it was fine with us to have two other couples the next night. I hesitantly agreed. I do enjoy our friends and their house parties we attended had fun people. It does bring out a side of me I repress. Night one was everything I looked forward to. We did some play together and then swapped for the night. Next day two couples joined. The evening was a normal night of meeting new people. Knowing more was going to happen it was great that we all melded. The new couples gave a vibe of knowing themselves very well. It turned out the husband of one couple and the wife of the other couple were brother and sister. I didn’t believe them at first even when I saw a resemblance. I know I must have looked shock. They made many jokes about their relationship. Their spouses said they both knew from the very beginning and has made for interesting family get togethers. To them it was funny and made jokes about rural trash and everyone does it where they are from. I knew they were pulling my leg. I thought incest was not a real thing up to then.

Yeah, I assume that he's gone missing since I see his picture on salad dressing bottles, etc.

Pervert? Yes...isn't that why we are here?

There's sort of a why-what-how series of questions that come into play during an internal conversation (a conversation with yourself). For the "why" aspect, you have to sort out whether you want this for you (curiosity, excitement, whatever) or you are being driven by a desire to please someone else (aka "boyfriend thinks it would be hot!") . Put simply, if the interest/desire is not coming from within you,just stop. No one determines your sexuality except you. For the "what" aspect, you need to sort out what you want the (first) experience to be like. What does that intimate episode look like in your fantasy? Is it anonymous or is there a relationship underpinning the experience? With whom? Having answered that question, what is fueling the anxiety? That you will be judged? That you might not enjoy it? That you might be hurt? Talking it out (to yourself) can be helpful. If you made it to "how", that's a little easier. Person(s), time, place, boundaries, safety. And give yourself permission to back out at any time without fear of disappointing anyone--first and foremost yourself. Good luck.

Yes they did play, not immediately. I am not a big party player and normally play I a separate room. I ended up in a room with the brother. We played about an hour and I went to freshen up. My new friend went to the room where the others were. He was sitting next to his sister. From there they played right on the floor.

I guess the closest I ever came to a relative was a first cousin I made out with when we were teens. But, honestly, if I'd run into a cousin at a swinger's event, and she and I both agreed, I'd think it would be pretty cool.