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From the woman's perspective, I pretty much agree with the above. Maybe not on the first date, but when the topic first turns to sex, as it certainly will, it would be best to bring up the subject early on, so as to not waste anyone's time. The best way to put anything is in terms of the other person - not "I'd like to swing," but rather "People make too big a deal of monogamy. I wouldn't demand it of you." Don't press the issue, but give her time to contemplate. You may need to sort through a few, but it will be worth it. Best of luck and keep us posted.

There really isn't an answer to your question, or others would have chimed in already. But I will share my thoughts at this point. Every relationship is unique in many ways. And honestly swinging is a really big step for the majority of people. It is contrary to how they were raised and societal norms. The chances of you meeting someone who is "swinger ready" are pretty much slim to none. So, if swinging is something you really want to do, then you have to be honest about it. In my case, monogamy was something that was never really important to me. It all depends on your motivations. If you want to find a woman that feels the same way, then you will have to look where the environment is already swinger friendly. If she is there, she leans that way to start off with. I saw a profile of a woman on SLS the other day who was specifically looking for a male swinging partner for a LTR. You might try there. You can also visit venues in your area that are swinger friendly. If you are up front in what you are looking for in a relationship, where ever you meet her, you are gonna have a lot of one and done dates, but then again, you might get lucky! Women at your age are past the raising kids stage, they are in their sexual prime, and you just never know. Good luck!

I'm new to the forum and wasn't sure where to post this. So, Administrator, please move to appropriate area if this isn't the right one. I'm single. 49 years old. Straight. Never married. No kids. Recently snipped. Very stable and good guy. Yes, a true bachelor. I've been out of the dating scene for a LONG time due to some bad experiences in late 2000's. I also discovered I wasn't truly emotionally available and it wasn't fair to women to be out there meeting them if I wasn't happy with myself--I was really just wasting their time. But things have changed. Totally different guy now. Lots of very positive things going on. Feeling good and looking good. So, now, I am ready to start meeting women again. So here's the question: When is the appropriate time to bring up with a woman that I'd like to try swinging if we are to be a couple? I've been reading a lot on the boards here. But it seems most people don't get into it until they are married. Lots of "We were monogamous and married for 20 years, then . . ." Well, what if you're a single guy, and you're out meeting women and dating them? I'm guessing that mentioning it on the first date isn't wise. But waiting until you're 6 months in isn't appropriate either--because she'll know I've had this planned all along. I guess what I'm saying is there aren't any single women out there who have "I am open to swinging" in their dating profiles. You know what I mean? As an example,I re-hooked up with a woman I've known for 19 years in 2019. We've done a lot together. She knows me as well as any woman on the planet. She is outgoing and friendly and non-prudish, etc. I brought up us going to a swingers club. Her response, "You want me to have sex with strangers????" And this is from a 46 year old with lots of sexual experience. And it's too bad because I know she would be extremely popular with other couples. Also, as a single guy, I don't want to be "that single guy" who rolls in to a swingers club or resort by himself. That just feels weird to me. I want swinging to be something that I experience with someone else I'm crazy about who feels like I do. I don't want to be viewed as a guy who is just into the scene because I want to have sex with other guys' wives. I want to make sure there are mutually beneficial relationships going on with giving and receiving. Or, am I looking at this wrong? Maybe it's better that couples don't get into swinging until they're married so that close emotional bond of love is solid. In addition, there's a contract if something goes wrong--one person can divorce the other. Whereas, just going as bf and gf, it's essentially just two single people who are together with no real penalty if things go wrong while swinging. Does swinging as a non-married couple make it more likely that jealousy and falling in love with someone else's wife or husband will happen? Yep, I think that's a good question too. Thoughts on this? Thanks. I think this forum is spectacular, by the way. So much openness and honesty.

I think you have the idea, Clearwater Man. I'll offer one more tip that I learned from my late wife: Never ask questions that can be answered with a "yes" or "no." Laura used the question, "How do y'all feel about Swinging?" She called it an "essay" question.

This is just a note from my tiny section of the swingers universe. First you worry about being "that guy". I am thinking that that pretty much innoculates you against that. You are aware and do not want to go there. That puts you ahead of all the horny post notching married men, and there are more than a few of those. Second not all swinger communities are structured in the same way. Some absolutely shun single men. They have their reasons some good some not so. Our particular group , while mostly married couples, decided a while ago that singles of either gender , if they behaved themselves, would be welcome. We are mostly an older group and these singles are sometimes widowed persons or divorced. We have had our share of couples that formed after meeting at a party. There have even been a few marriages.Being a bit older and knowing what you want sometimes makes thing simpler. If you were to show up at a group like ours , out of 40 people, you would be one of 3-4 single males (at this point 5-7 single females). If you were civil and participated in the social and work activities the ladies would notice. It might take a few parties with little or no action as they vetted you. Even as a married guy I went through that.( My wife not so much. I didn't get jealous of other guys playing with her as I was perturbed a bit by the disparity in our activity levels.) At any rate after a number of parties it was no longer an issue. Even at the first party while I was helping the ladies set up the meal I was getting my ass grabbed and on full on hug and kiss as a thanks. I think you would experience much the same given the right group. On our part we met a gentleman who has become a long term play partner, mostly in threes , but on occasion with just my wife. As to your question of WHEN, I would say if you don't recognize the time, then it has not come. That of course is not an issue if you meet in a swingers environment in the first place. If you do get involved with a vanilla, why not just lay it out there as a fascination of yours while you are still in the discovery stage, not phrasing it as "Do you want to do this with me?" Let it perk in her mind for a while if she does she might just surprise you.

Lately I am addicted to my girlfriends pussy while my husband is inside her. I love watching them together and pleasuring them both - can’t get enough.

Seems like your wife wants a GF with no involvement from you. Let her have her f/f fun. Give her some space and freedom. She'll love you for it.