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Sorry your first experience was less than stellar. When you go to a house party, there is often a free for all motif. Your wife finds a partner or partners and you do, too. The problem for you, which is sometimes a problem for me, is that our wives are the belle of the ball and we are just another male. I have spent house parties in the living room eating coffee cake while my wife is taking on the whole party. A lot of interest in my wife, less so for me. Just to keep it brief and direct, I have two solutions. One, at house parties decide who you would like to do and ask them. Keep in mind it’s a little like musical chairs. If you don’t ask, someone else will and you will be eating coffee cake while someone else is plowing your choice. Plan B is to have you and your wife approach a couple in your league and have your wife ask them if they want to play( less threatening than if you ask). That way you both have someone to play with. We do that often and go individually after that, but at least we both get activity and don’t feel left out. Note that many couples have said no. Part of the game. Plan C is to meet a couple at a bar or restaurant for a vanilla meeting. If all 4 want to play, make a play date at your home, their home or a hotel. Everyone should get to play. I like this format best. Quiet, focused, I know I will score. Don’t give up. We have had some wacky episodes. Everyone in the LS has.

Do you understand what average means? About the same as most others. Some much smaller, some bigger. I can tell you the larger man didn’t spoil it for you. What makes you think she hasn’t been with men before you that were bigger. I can tell you my toy is bigger than my husband, So What.

We go out for steak, spaghetti, tacos, hamburgers and many other things I make at home. The difference is it always different in a restaurant.

Swinging is just like every other couple activity in which you can engage. If you bowl, some nights she'll have a better score than you some nights, vice versa. She had a good night and you?? Hell, you got to watch. Actually, for a 1st experience, you two did well. You didn't describe yourselves but understand, swinging is generally a couples sport and a visual one. Perhaps your wife is more physically attractive than you? If so, go to the gym, get a haircut and work on your social skills. Swinging women basically call the shots in this hobby, something your first experience demonstrated clearly. Work a bit to become more attractive to the women around you and to be considered a "fair" trade. The best part of your story is that your wife established that she was attractive to both sexes. That's gotta be good for her. Be proud of her instead of jealous and take an honest look at yourself in the mirror and address whatever you need to to be your wife's equal in the attractiveness department.

We talked about exes when we dated, but not nonmonogamy. We're lucky things later turned out as they did.

As my wife has said about what we do when playing - "It's like going to a restaurant, you don't order something you can get at home."

When I start to ejaculate, it can be sudden and I have an extremely difficult time pulling out of whatever I'm into. If there are boundaries, I need to know beforehand so I can comply. Fortunately, my wife and the other women are fine with it wherever.

PaDoc, are you saying golf doesn't make you feel awkward or bad about yourself? Maybe you haven't played the stupid game . . .

We were out for my birthday....mrs was looking exceptionally hot is a tight sexy minidress and 6" platform heels. We were obviously on the prowl that night and she whispered in my ear, "I want to be your dirty whore this evening, so we can do whatever you want"! That was an instant hard on. We did find a single guy in the bar and went to his room shortly after that.....

The hottest thing my husband ever told me was before the first time we had sex. We were making out. He looked into my eyes and with intense longing in his voice he said "I want you". That's how he got my virginity.