Sorry your first experience was less than stellar.
When you go to a house party, there is often a free for all motif. Your wife finds a partner or partners and you do, too. The problem for you, which is sometimes a problem for me, is that our wives are the belle of the ball and we are just another male. I have spent house parties in the living room eating coffee cake while my wife is taking on the whole party. A lot of interest in my wife, less so for me.
Just to keep it brief and direct, I have two solutions. One, at house parties decide who you would like to do and ask them. Keep in mind it’s a little like musical chairs. If you don’t ask, someone else will and you will be eating coffee cake while someone else is plowing your choice.
Plan B is to have you and your wife approach a couple in your league and have your wife ask them if they want to play( less threatening than if you ask). That way you both have someone to play with. We do that often and go individually after that, but at least we both get activity and don’t feel left out. Note that many couples have said no. Part of the game.
Plan C is to meet a couple at a bar or restaurant for a vanilla meeting. If all 4 want to play, make a play date at your home, their home or a hotel. Everyone should get to play. I like this format best. Quiet, focused, I know I will score.
Don’t give up. We have had some wacky episodes. Everyone in the LS has.