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For us, I (husband) had briefly been in a poly triad before meeting my wife. She knew about that, and thought it really wrong that my girlfriend was cheating on her husband. I patiently explained that she wasn't cheating, and I was friends with her husband, and everything was on the up and up. She still didn't like it, and was adamantly opposed to the idea. I never suggested it for us, I just shared it as part of what couples do; sharing their past. Over the early years of our marriage, the subject of the poly triad I had been in came up every once in a blue moon. My now wife had always voiced objection to it. I would have bet every penny I ever earned that we would never have gotten into swinging or polyamory. It wasn't even a thought. I was quite content with things how they were, and being monogamous with my wife for the rest of my life. Then, six years in, she surprised the hell out of me and mentioned in bed one evening something like "You know, I could see the advantage in having two men; both could massage me at the same time" (she absolutely loves massage; can't get enough of it). That started the ball rolling, and many months later after considerable discussion, lots of reading together, thoughts, scenarios considered, etc. we found ourselves at a swing club for the first time ever. The first few experiences weren't all that great. Not bad, just not great. Then, she had a lover who just made her toes curl, and she completely bought into non-monogamy then. That was 12 years ago now, and we're still here.

So maybe my couple on couple x2 a "soft swing orgy", the Padoc's couple on couple on couple a "full swap orgy"?? Man, this orgy shit gets complicated Now there's something everyone would agree with!!

Our first swapping a number of years ago was in different rooms where I was made love to my a great man. It was really romantic. The next day was horrible when I was used by that same man for sex in front of others. I also didn’t enjoy watching my husband have sex with another woman and I had no desire to be with another woman. To this day I still prefer being alone with a partner even if others are playing in a party setting. We don’t play very often and it’s mostly with the original couple who doesn’t live close to us. When we do visit them they have invited others to our evenings. Over time I have let myself enjoy other men and even though I was originally repulsed by being with women. Over time I reluctantly did a little play, more allowing and me not a great participant with women. Over the New Year we visited our friends who also invited two other couples. We did play as a group which I don’t know if I was ready for. The couples were not what I thought it was going to be. They were pretty nice people and we enjoyed everything that led up to the inevitable sex. I found myself with a man we just met and was nervous. I wanted to go to a bedroom with him as I am more comfortable that way. We didn’t and all of us stayed in the same room. After a little hesitation I felt more comfortable and started to enjoy. Then I saw two of the women playing and prayed they would leave me alone. Didn’t take long before I was drawn into playing. After some playing and fun at my expense it came out that I enjoy separate room play. I was coaxed into going to another room with one of the women. We spent the rest of the night together at first talking, telling stories and eventually much more. She was great in not forcing me to do things and instead letting things happen. I think I at first felt obligated but it the end I wanted to play. I am still evolving.

My husband didn’t “let” me, I never asked him if I could have sex when he is out of town. He suggested it. We had played with his best friend and my husband wanted me to have fun when he travels for work. I was surprised that he was so insistent. He explained that he knew it would be safe and there was no reason for me to be lonely. I think you need to feel safe if you go along with her want. If you feel threatened you will not be happy

Missionary. It give most phisical bond to us

I'm not sure there is a standard definition but for us 2 couples is a swap. 2 couples and a 3rd guy is a 5-some (one of Mrs Docs favorite combination) 3 couples or more sharing a bed is, to us, an orgy. Sadly, we haven't had nearly as many of them as we'd like!