There was a book I read, "Speaker for the Dead" which had something I really liked as a kid and still do now.
The "Speaker for the Dead" would basically do an investigation of the life of someone who died and then tell their whole story at the memorial. The good the bad the shocking. I wouldn't mind my swinging activities coming out after my death, but obviously I wouldn't want my wife to have to field those stares from the uninitiated either, so I'd have to go second