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We probably have 3 different modes of play depending upon the venue: 1. At a club: its often fairly quick and intense. This is especially true if we're in a group setting where we can have several partners in a short time, 20 minutes to an hour. Although there have been a few occasions at Trapeze when we've gone to the back at about 11:00 and next thing we knew it was 1:00 am. Mrs Doc calls that "bacon time". Those of you unfamiliar with Trapeze, they serve an excellent late (or early) breakfast and we know that if we make it to bacon time it's been a VERY good night. 2. At a house party: There is more of a build-up, sexy clothing, chatting and feeling up friends, ice breaker games, etc. We play at parties with people we know or friends of people we know so we often have multiple partners or end up in a big puppy pile taking generally around 2 to 2.5 hrs on average. 3. At home(ours or another couples): These occasions are more protracted. There is always a lot of foreplay, sometimes together, sometimes separate rooms. Our goal is for the four of us to cum as many times as possible, admittedly way easier for the two women than for most guys who are on the upper edge of the age curve. Sometimes with hydration or snack breaks, or a dip in the pool or spa before round 2, generally 2-3 hours. Of course, much of the above is directed related to Mrs Doc. She's multi-orgasmic but when she's done, she's DONE and therefore so am I. The attached picture is from a pre Wuhan party. Mrs Doc is on the right. There were 4 other wives that weren't in the picture. THAT was a 3 hour play party!!

We're the feature length movie types. The quickest times I can remember were at clubs and those were still probably at least 15 minutes, and that was really due more to the circumstances of not just having the whole place to yourself without other people wanting the room so they can play too. Some play sessions have gone on most of the evening until late, and then if you count some goodbye sex the next morning before heading home after an overnighter as all one session, then multiple times across 12+ hours. There are lots of intermissions and down time in those sessions though. Neither of us is the pound away for hours type, and we haven't encountered any playmates like that either really. So it's more have sex at whatever pace feels right, take a break and hang out and chat for a while, maybe another session, hang out, maybe a nightcap, and so on. Just whatever feels right and everyone is up for. Sometimes everyone will be taking a break, then two will get going again, and that often fires up the other two also. Or, sometimes not, and those two are content to just watch or even be somewhere else in the house having a drink or whatever. As far as how many time the guys getting off? Just depends. Usually once, maybe twice, probably three times absolute tops and that is with a lot of down time involved.

Let us agree that communication is foundational to every successful marriage. Part of the Lifestyle, and surely part of an 'open' marriage is intense trust that the other person will not put the marriage at risk. Your 'need to know' suggests her flirting --and not telling you--is a sign that you believe that your marriage is at risk. She believes otherwise. The notion of trust means that your need--and her beliefs--need to be resolved. That doesn't mean your need takes priority over her belief. It does mean, however, that either of you has the right to bring up concerns about trust and the other has the responsibility to listen to concerns. Setting monogamy aside requires much greater attention to fidelity and loyalty.

I never thought of it like that. How are we counting? Three at once gangbang style or three in one night? I always think of my wife Amy having a just one man in a night. This is her usual swinger lover. One night we swapped with a different couple using condoms. Number 1. Amy did not enjoy the swap with condoms. She had a second swap with her regular swinger lover, going bareback. Number 2. We went home and had sex for a third time. Number 3. That's three, not all at the same time, but in the same evening.

But if they were, you can be certain that their backswing was excellent.

Brides were serial, not simultaneous. ☺️ First one was ten years, second one seven years and most recent one 30 years and counting. ? I’m optimistic that with this one “Till death do us part” will be literal and not simply notional. None of my three spouses had sex with anyone else on our wedding nights, but then again we didn’t attend swinger parties in the evening of our nuptials. My first wife did have (non-penetrative) sex with the then husband of my current spouse while I was in the same room playing with my current wife. But that was a one-off event, more than 40 years ago and there was no follow-up with current wife for about a dozen years (during which I had a whole second marriage, the wedding for which my current wife attended. Is this sufficiently complicated?) My first marriage was casually but consensually non-monogamous. We talked about swinging, but in those days there wasn’t the current social infrastructure to facilitate it. We both thought it might be fun, but our lives were quite busy (she was a medical student) and we weren’t sufficiently committed to the notion to follow through. Early on in our relationship my second wife hinted at interest in swinging, but at that point I didn’t have much interest. My current wife identifies as bi, but isn’t interested in casual sex and doesn’t believe she could manage a polyamorous lifestyle. (“If I fall in love with someone else and start having sex with them, it’s going to be bad news for you.” Okay, got it!) Thankfully, she is a generous and non-jealous soul and okay with me pursuing my variety of sexual interests, as long as the relationships remain casual. And as long as I always keep her fully informed. Which I do. So, no, none of my wives had sex with anyone else on our respective wedding nights. But I will note that watching my first wife with current wife’s then husband remains one of the most compelling sexual experiences of my life. My wife is well aware that I would be more than eager to bring a third of either gender — or a couple — into our bed. I most often play with couples, mostly committed ones. I see how avidly the men tend to watch while their women and I engage, and I am just a little jealous. I would love to watch my own wife in that same situation. And she knows if she ever changes her mind I will do whatever I can to facilitate. Even if she wants the privacy of a one-on-one.

When I was a young cop, my partner on the job took a weekend and went with his g/f to Platos in NYC. He came back and told me all about their experiences (you talk about all kinds of stuff on midnight shifts) and he suggested my wife and I go with them some weekend. I mentioned it to my wife at the time but her religious upbringing prohibited her from even giving it a 2nd thought. Other than one very hot night on our honeymoon several years before, she would never entertain a suggestion to expand our sex life. So we never went. I occasionally would broach the subject with her but was stonewalled every time. 20 years later, I was dating Mrs Doc when we saw a tv news expose about Club Khama Sutra on South St in Philly. We checked and found CKS and about 4 other clubs we all within about an hours drive from our home. We talked about it for a week or so and then went to TJ's near Harrisburg. We were hooked. Within 2 months, we'd visited all four of the close clubs and then started to really expand our sexual horizons. By the time we got married 2 years later, there was no question that we would honeymoon at Desire.

Like Sandra, my wife Mary tends to get a little wild at house parties and not elsewhere. When we're having friends over to our house for a threesome or foursome, we're limited by the number of people, obviously. At the club, there's too many things to do, and Mary is not attracted to the public room. Our normal scene is that we will play in a foursome, then do other things for awhile. Such as the jacuzzi and dancing. By the time we're ready again, we'll find a single guy for her or possibly another foursome. Then at 2:00 they're kicking us out, so we're done. But at house parties, there's no other things to do after the first round other than conversing in the kitchen with other people, and they are all dressed (or undressed) sexily, which leads us into more trouble. Plus, unlike the other scenarios, Mary and I trust a number of people there who are our friends, and we tend to split up rather than stay together. Without that consideration, Mary tends to become more accepting of invitations, so her body count goes up.