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I hope so! We have seriously discussed and agreed that once Trapeze (FLL) reopens, we'll definitely go for a long weekend at Haulover and the Club. We think Trapeze will survive. The club is long established, well managed, has a good rep for cleanliness, and a huge clientele. I would guess that some of the lesser clubs may have problems regenerating their business.

One of the things that has made my wife scratch her head for years is this male mind set of "staying power"! She thinks some of it stems from porn. Her take on sex is simple, the goal is to have fun and have orgasms. Swinger sex is equally simple, have fun and share orgasms. Pounding eventually becomes boring. The fact is, she is complimented when her partner cums, especially if its more or less effortless in the flow of the sexual encounter. Of course, her view may have something to do with the fact that if someone takes just a little time with foreplay, she cums very easily, wetly and frequently.

"When did you realize that monogamy was optional?" When we dated and got married, my wife and I were comfortable talking about our exes, then about our sexual experiences with them. It turned us both on. When my wife talked about two in particular who she enjoyed, I thought, "Why not?" She knew them, had fun fucking them, and most importantly for me (at first anyway), she had already had sex with them, so why should I care/worry. I suggested it, she was eager and did it with them separately, and it was our start.

We also both grew up in fairly religious/sexually conservative environments and got the same official boilerplate about how it works with men and women. She took it to heart and was a surprisingly good Catholic schoolgirl while her friends were blowing roadies then married young, I spent my twenties having casual sex with multiple women after growing apart from my high school sweetheart. A big part of what got us started in the first place was her finally feeling safe trying and enjoying casual sex without the lying and pretending that people do, but once we realized it was something serious, the official line still crept back in that a committed relationship has different, less fun rules. It took years, even after we'd experimented with other couples, for us to fully come to grips with the number of things that other people care about but that we just really do not and can have our own private space where it's completely OK to get off on things we "shouldn't". That took a lot of very frank and open communication that we'd closed off somewhat when we got serious. Looking back, the whole thing and the baggage is ridiculous. Mrs. E has said more than once that if she'd realized it didn't matter as much as she'd been told and how much fun people were having, she would have spent her high school/college years on all fours in the locker room. I know I blew up a couple of serious relationships trying to be a "good traditional vanilla boyfriend" when they would have lit up if I'd suggested a threesome.

Caliente has discovered in the last 10 years or so that swingers travel for sex and that they spend a lot more money than nudists. Consequently, it has become way more swinger friendly according to our friends. Last time we were there , about 5 years ago, we decided we'd BYOFWB and went with 3 other couples and had a wonderful weekend. The time before that, we had gone alone, met a couple by the pool and had a nice afternoon with them before we totally offended them by inviting them back to our room. She said, "you're swingers"? with a look she'd have likely has if she had just stepped in fresh, warm dog shit. That's why we decided to BYOFWB. SDC has some events at the resort that had been well attended. Let us know your experiences if you go. We've been considering another visit.

Nice to see you are receiving so much support here. I agree with all said above. You owed him NOTHING! Frankly, if I give my partner a couple of orgasms and don't orgasm myself, I'm still a happy camper. I like to give pleasure, I receive plenty as well. So, in the cosmic score keeping, I trust it will all work out. Besides, it's all so fluid (sorry for the pun) anyway. I like to think of sex as pleasure, not orgasms. Pleasure is available to us in so many varied and erotic ways, why limit the experience as pleasureable to whether one has an orgasm or not. Seems reductionist.

To me, there is a VAST difference in non monagomy and having an affair. Non monagamy that invokes knowledge of (for sure!) and participation of both parties, such as swinging. An affair means lies, sneaking, deceit and is hurtful to one partner. That being said, what happens between a married or committed couple is their own business....if they’re happy with non monogamy....good for them.