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We have been discussing finally leaving our house and meeting people. I was open to meeting friends for drinks outdoors, my frisky wife had been contacting lifestyle friends for more than drinks. Beaches finally opened in N.J. including our national park beach in Sandy Hook that has a clothing optional area. We made a plan to meet a couple we have played with at the beach along with another couple. It was a perfect beach day. I will admit to laughing at the sight of nude people with masks on. Masks were not prevalent on most. Most of the talk was about what is going on and how we are dealing with it. Plenty of sex talk bordering on porn description. Our friends invited us back to their home to continue the day. Both couples were great to hang with and we were extremely comfortable spending the day with. I was less comfortable going back for what most certainly wouldn’t be social distancing. We took a rain check on the invite. I just wasn’t ready even if I may have been the only one who was still worrying. One the way home my wife seemed annoyed with me. She thinks we won’t be invited in the future. I am just being careful, possibly over cautious.

I don’t think the exchange of STD reports is common. They are pretty useless except for one point in time for you to know how you are. The day after your test if you have a new sexual partner, your test is moot. We get a full panel STD check once a year. We have found that most swingers we encounter do use condoms or will use condoms if asked. People think of STDs as syphillis, gonorrhea and chlamydia, but HPV and HSV are more common. Condoms help prevent HPV and HSV, but they are far from perfect. Hope your wife has had the HPV vaccine, if not, look into it. There are some couples that would not play with us because we are 100% condom compliant. If you want to play bareback, there are many who will. We are hesitant to play with couples who play bareback with others even if they wear condoms for us. We think they are more likely to encounter STDs. We hear about “trusting” other people, but people often don’t know they have something themselves. Hate to be Debbie Downer, but assess your risk and decide what risks you are willing to take.

Just like "couplers", I'm wired for polyamory so it is part of my nature and can't be "stopped". But I'm a swinger too and the 'play' part of it is dispensable. By this I mean the hobby part which is motivated by curiosity, especially when I was still starting out in the Ls. Although most of the time, I swing with people who I'm really attracted to - sexy personality or wit - whom I want to bond with in an intimate way. So I guess that won't go away ?

As a healthcare professional in the front lines of care of COVID patients, I will attest that your caution and prudence are entirely appropriate. While your wife's disappointment is understandable, we continue to see apparently healthy people sicken and in some cases die from the infection. LS friends who are true friends will accept your caution.

You can only make one mistake with covid19. I endorse your caution. If they are a nice, considerate couple, you will get another chance. We have had many near misses, snubs and unexpected no second times in the lifestyle. It’s just part of the hobby, there are always new people to meet. You have no idea as to the other couple’s contacts. We are in New Jersey, also, and our friends from other parts of the country often are unaware of how bad the pandemic is in NJ. Stay safe, hope for a vaccine or treatment and congrats for getting out. We belong to a nudist resort and we are hesitant to go.

Tinderizing, I toy with those that are just so out of touch they don’t get it. Recently after just a brief “hello” this fellow starts in on how he would like to get a room and have me be his fuck slut. He asks if I spit or swallow . I didn’t answer. Eventually I just said I was too classy for him (his profile said he was looking for a classy woman.) He continued to contact me, was I thinking of him? No. I said I am looking for intelligent men with style and substance. He kept at it. I encouraged him to learn to use his spell check. Then he called me a smart ass, changed his mind to dumb ass, why was I being such a bitch to him? He wants me to want him. When I finally said “keep wanking” he said “bye bye” like a small child. Was I bitchy? Maybe, but “he had it coming” (Chicago quote)

We LOVE Hedo! (Hedonism 2 in Negril Jamaica.) Trip # 24 coming up in the fall. All kinds of folks go to Hedo, young, old, thin, curvy, nudists only, soft-swap or full-swap, great and friendly people from all over the US and Canada and many other counties. Everyone gets along. Easy to make friends. There is no pressure to do anything you don't want to do, but the opportunity exists to do just about anything you do want to do. Yes, there are some single guys and single gals, but most are very nice and polite, and when they're not, security or other guests will set them straight. It is a beautiful place with lots of improvements in recent years. Staff is great. Good food and lots entertainment and activities, water sports, snorkeling,, tennis, gym, etc. Get a massage in the spa or on the beach. You can get naked, go to the nude pool or hot tub, visit the playroom, have sex with your partner, swap with another couple, have a threesome, whatever, party all day and all night. Or, just wear your swimsuit to the clothing optional beach and read your book all day and sleep all night. Your vacation, your choice. Lots of groups go there of all types. Check out the groups on the Hedo website, see which one appeals to you, and book with them. No matter what you are looking for, it will be the best vacation of your life. Good luck.

Our first was at HEDO. Over did it on the first day, but is was a blast. We have been back 20 times.

I’ve recently met a few buddies and they’ll come over a few nights a week, drink a few beers, sit on the couch and I blow them. They enjoy the release and I enjoy giving. They’re about 10 yrs older than me...great group of 3.

NJPM gave very good advice. Mary and I are tested every six months, I in January in June, she in April and October. Assuming if one has it, we both do, then we get tested every three months. (In 18 years, no positive results. We always use condoms.)