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Since our introduction to swinging I have opened up to a more public sex experience, something that almost stopped me at the start. I have posted that our first experience was a swap of mates. Having sex with a new partner in private was an unforgettable experience. Not taking anything away from the great sex I have with my husband, a new partner, a man I just met was both terrifying and indescribable in a slut way. In private I was being the deep seated sexual person I wanted to be. I didn’t care what anyone was going to think, I wanted to be satisfied first and satisfying the partner I was with was secondary. Behind closed doors he was the perfect partner and the night was everything I hoped it would be. He told me it was great and I at the time felt he was truthful. Same person, now in a public setting, with my husband watching with the other wife acted in a totally different manner. What was erotic now became raw. What was tender now became hard and dominating. What was a shared experience was now me being used as a receptacle for his sexual release. I didn’t complain at the time and my discomfort of the scene was not picked up by my husband. The lover was now being a showman. I have since become more comfortable with public sex, the same partner is now more fun in public, no longer trying to show his manliness to others. He has become my favorite person, other than my husband, to have sex with. His wife is the only woman I have become comfortable playing with. Even with her, I still enjoy private play versus putting on a display for the men. Private or public, I still would chose private with one person.

Interesting news item as to why vanilla folks -- and even some LS folks--prefer to mate in private. https://phys.org/news/2020-08-humans-private.html The explanation is a bit of a "just so" story, and one wonders whether the norm of "behind closed doors" is social, cultural, or biological. Do you prefer same room play? Playing in public for the risk of being caught? Playing in public for the thrill of being watched? The LS is many things, but rarely the vanilla norm. Here's the link to full scientific report. https://royalsocietypublishing.org/doi/10.1098/rspb.2020.1330

My wife told me I’m the best!

I'm left with the question as to why you started down this road in the first place. The idea of swinging, ultimately, is to see your spouse have as much sexual pleasure as possible, and for you to do the same, in that order. If that's not your goal and you don't enjoy getting there, then you need to find another religion.

As already noted, you should not be playing right now. Also as noted, maybe house parties are not for you. There is a much bigger issue here. To be successful in swinging, you must have an abundance of love, trust, and communication...not just some, but an abundance. Working on building trust isn't good enough. You have said that you don't trust her several times and that she 'doesn't remember' what happened and has a problem 'being honest with herself'. Does she have a problem remembering or is it that she lacks trust in herself and/or you? Either way, this indicates that you two aren't ready (yet). The good news is that it is a problem that is repairable and most definitely needs to be repaired even if you never swing again. The answer is love, trust and communication. The more you do any of the three generally increases ALL THREE. Jealousy usually is a byproduct of not having enough of all three. Stop swinging and work on improving your communication and until you feel that you are at complete peace with how things are in your relationship. Then and only then readdress the idea of swinging. Good luck and let us know how things are going for you two.

We have a good friend that is totally into this. She loves the verbal abuse and for the guys to totally use her body. She will take on 6 or 7 guys and let them take turns fucking anything they want. Just her groove - definitely not mine. I love having 3 or 4 guys at a time as long as they treat me like a goddess!

I hope you don't get me wrong on this Shelly, I fully support you in your decision as I do SW_PA_Couple in theirs, nor would I even think of saying either one of you is wrong in the choice you have made. The only thing I have a problem with, and maybe it is not how you meant it, but it seems so, is the idea that people shouldn't give their opinion here if it differs from yours on this subject. As I said before, there are people who swing that cannot believe that people would swing without condoms and others that cannot imagine why anyone would use them. I have no problem with either view on a personal level, I have done the research and made my decision on our use of condoms, so what others think is only important when the time comes to make the decision to play with them or not. The only thing that bothered me about your post is the idea that we should all be policed in what we say if we believe differently than the supporters of condom use. If we did that, we wouldn't be giving a very accurate picture of what the real swinging world is like, and if that standard of politically correctness were carried to all subjects here, it would make the sight pretty useless, in my opinion.

I have to respectfully disagree with you here, saying that "condoms are definitely safer than not using one at all." is just not true with the STD's one is most likely to encounter. If it makes one feel better to believe this that is fine by me, but this belief is not supported by reputable studies. For example studies of HPV transmission rates with or without a condom show no measurable difference and studies of herpes transmission rates that show a difference, show only a slight difference, and these are the two most common incurable STD's one is likely to encounter. Therefore, I don't see any problem with someone stating whether they use condoms or not, or even giving there opinion of whether they think others should use them or not, as it really boils down to each individuals determination of the risks involved and how much protection, if any, they believe condoms will provide. I just do not see where anyone is better served by people censoring their posts to perpetuate the politically correct myth that all swingers use, or should use condoms because it is a personal decision and many do not. As for people who might say, "Well, they don't use one, so we won't either.", if that is their decision, then I don’t see the problem, because it is only a matter of time before they meet up with other swingers that prefer not to use condoms or even those that out right refuse to, so they will then have to decide anyway. I find it interesting that in the swinging community you run into as many people who are as baffled by the people that think condoms will protect them as people bewildered by those that chose not to use them.