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You know many many many people in the world would/could/do say the exact same thing about swinging/partner sharing/infidelity etc. Everything is a matter of degrees and here in this community I hope a pray we can all be open to others without judgement regardless of our/their unique kinks. My wife loves men sucking each other. Don't know why exactly, but I also don't care why. She gets off and that's all that matters. Is it for everyone? Nope. But I'm not into ass licking either, whether with a man or woman. But I don't judge those that enjoy that activity and I would never suggest it isn't desirable in this setting.

While not part of "mainstream" swinging (definitely an oxymoron @njbm) it is probably more common than most people think and we once met a couple whose wife literally came just at the sight of her husband sucking cock.

How to proposition friends and acquaintances? Create the opportunities - I would leave my friend alone with my husband for short periods to show that I wasn't jealous; I would undress/dress in front of both of them. (It was something I had done in front of her before, and obviously had done in front of my husband, but with both there it created an interesting dynamic.) Go slowly - let the other person take the next incremental step, then welcome it. Make your response mutual - when she said she found my husband attractive, I would say he finds you attractive too.

When Laura and I were swinging, our "play-dates" were all about fun. We laughed, joked, and giggled. Laura was particularly adept at making the most audacious remarks, putting us all into hysterics. It wasn't an atmosphere that fostered something serious like love. Once, while doing a well-endowed fellow, she said, "Ohmigawd, Darling! I've felt cocks in my throat before, but never from this direction!"

I like most of the women with whom I have had swinging activity. But I am in love with my wife and have not even remotely approached that status with a playmate. Totally a recreational activity for me.

We know plenty of couples who are into it. The women love it. m/m play in the context of mfmf and mfm play is more common than you might think. And, it would not happen if the ladies weren't enthusiastically in favor - because as we all know - they are in charge.

I personally have no desire to see that. We were playing at parties and have never seen it occur within the guys in our group. It also has not come up in any conversations. I try to keep an open mind to what others do and would not disparage guys who are into it. So here I am, a participant of same sex play saying two females is fun but not wanting to watch two males. Does that make me a hypocrite?

Main stream swinging is an oxymoron. Swinging is not main stream. Within swinging there are diverse interests. Bisexuality by both genders, BDSM, hot wifing, vixen/stag, dom/sub. Many of these sub interests are currently of no interest to me, but if I am open minded enough to participate in the lifestyle, I owe it to participants in these subgroups to be tolerant and supportive of their interests and not denigrate them.

I Make love when we meet I Love what he does when we are together I Love what we do together I Love the anticipation of meeting I Love pleasing and being pleased I Love the snuggling, kissing and playing. BUT I ONLY LOVE MY HUSBAND!!!!

The whole feelings thing pops up in numerous topics. Perhaps I will start another one shortly, but for right now I have a question. Why do so many think that love is a finite commodity? Yes there are different loves, mine for my wife is unique. There are others though that fall close to it. We have some friends who have gotten very close to us. The others wife and I... well let us just say that I am very glad that my wife is not the jealous type. In many cases the feelings involved might justify it. The one thing that makes it work for us is that the four of us are all very protective of the others marriages. This is not , by my definition, polyamory. It is just that something has really clicked with my lover and I, coupled with everyone having their priorities in line. The fact that both of our spouses are comfortable and supportive with us is remarkable. This is probably because there is no doubt on anyone's part where first loyalties lie.

I met my SO and present bf during a swing play. But it is not like we had played several times before developing a feeling for each other. The swing just became an initial meeting point, just like meeting for coffee (!), but they later pursued me to develop the friendship and fell in love. Bf came into my life much later.

I have posted my beginning of being in the lifestyle. I don’t pretend to know the whole conversation my wife and her friend had. My wife’s best friend from childhood got divorced and then remarried. My wife was with her through the highs and lows. Most likely my wife knew some deep reasons of her friends life. I’m just the husband and only heard what my wife shared. During her rebound she dated a few men. I always wondered how many she was with. Fast forward she marries a guy that I approve of. I felt almost like a brother-in-law and wanted the best for her. That is the background that must have led to the women talking about swinging. The new husband was a swinger in his prior marriage. I had no idea. I don’t know how the topic came up or what was said or how my wife first reacted. It must have excited my wife enough for her and our friend connived a way to get me to agree to us playing with them. I read so many posts about the downside of going forward. I figured they were experienced and who better to initiate us than friends we liked. In our start I was the one who had to be convinced not the wife. My exact memory of my fears have faded. My memory of jealousy has faded. My memory of our friend and me is still vivid. There might be a downside of playing with friends, for me I couldn’t think of anyone better.

But seriously, my gay friend excitedly asked me "did your balls touch?" when listening to my wife share the details of her most recent DP experience. I said, "I don't think so" and he seemed disappointed. ???